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            <text>Volume 43 </text>
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            <text>The budget: see where student money goes</text>
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            <text>UWPAC124 Ranger News</text>
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            <text>November 6,2013&#13;
v.v _ 1^^ I News since 1972 _ . ^ N ews&#13;
University of Wisconsin Parkside's Student Newspaper&#13;
IU^ange^ews is written and edited by students of the University of Wisconsin Parkside and they are solely responsible for its editorial policy and content.&#13;
The budget: see where student money goes&#13;
Jimmy Gibbs&#13;
gibbsO 14 @ u wp .edu&#13;
Every year, both new and returning students of&#13;
UW Parkside pay tuition in order to attend classes.&#13;
As most are familiar with the process already, the&#13;
school year is broken up into two semesters. Each semester&#13;
is broken up financially, with students paying&#13;
a particular amount of tuition based on the number&#13;
of credit hours they will be taking during the given&#13;
semester. So where does student tuition money actually&#13;
go?&#13;
One of the charges that are added into a student s&#13;
tuition every semester is known as segregated fees, or&#13;
seg. fees. Seg. fees are defined as "mandatory charges&#13;
in addition to instructional fees that are assessed to all&#13;
students to provide funds for recreational, cultural,&#13;
and leisure activities and groups that are not funded&#13;
through other state appropriations." This definition&#13;
can be found on the Cashiers office web page on the&#13;
UW Parkside website. Of these segregated fees, there&#13;
are two categories: allocable seg. fees and non-allocable&#13;
seg. fees. The allocated seg. fees are designed&#13;
to support student activities and programming. They&#13;
are then distributed among the various Parkside organizations,&#13;
such as WIPZ Radio, Rainbow Alliance,&#13;
Student Organizations Council and many more. The&#13;
funds these organizations receive from the allocable&#13;
seg. fees are not fixed, meaning that they are subject&#13;
to change every year depending on what each organization&#13;
spent the following year, how much the organization&#13;
actually needs and so on.&#13;
There are also the non-allocable seg. fees. These&#13;
fees are intended to support fixed financial commitments&#13;
such as debt services, contracts and student&#13;
service programs. These fees can be referred to as&#13;
fixed in a sense. In other words, they are a long term&#13;
commitment that needs to be paid off" over time by&#13;
the university. One example that Scott Menke, Controller&#13;
Director of Business Services here at Parkside,&#13;
provided was the new Student Center. The upgrades&#13;
and building of the new Student Center cost upwards&#13;
of $1.8 million, but the annual seg. fees collected&#13;
from all students was around $1.6 million. In order to&#13;
pay for the Student Center, and also allow for funds&#13;
to still be distributed to the other organizations and&#13;
areas in which they are intended to support, the full&#13;
amount must be paid off over time. Each year, then, a&#13;
set amount is designated from the seg. fees to pay off&#13;
the debt owed for the Student Center.&#13;
The seg. fee distribution is decided upon each year&#13;
by the Segregated University Fee Allocation Committee&#13;
(SUFAC). The seg. fees are broken down by&#13;
credit hour in terms of what students actually pay.&#13;
Students pay $42.50 per credit hour, which comes&#13;
out to $508.80 for 12 credit hours, and a grand total&#13;
of $1,017.60 for the year. This amount is subject to&#13;
change each year, because enrollment must be taken&#13;
into consideration along with what the overall budget&#13;
is for the year.&#13;
Not all students are subject to paying these seg.&#13;
fees. Some examples of those that are not required to&#13;
pay segregated fees include athletes, military veterans&#13;
and TEDU students to name a few. What is important&#13;
to point out, however, is that not all student&#13;
athletes or veterans are exempt from paying the fees.&#13;
Menke refers to this as what is known as the "Seg.&#13;
Fee Remission." When looking at student athletes,&#13;
what this remission means is that each year the Athletics&#13;
department is given a fixed number of student&#13;
athletes that they can bring in that would be exempt&#13;
from paying the segregated fees. This year that number&#13;
is 145. This is the same for veterans, and the rest&#13;
that fall under the "Seg Fee Remission." The reason&#13;
for this is for recruiting and enticement. Basically,&#13;
if a potential student is undecided about coming to&#13;
Parkside, a $1,000 off tuition promise is intended to&#13;
sway their decision towards coming to the university.&#13;
This is the same tactic used for some out-of-state&#13;
students that attend Parkside. Several out-of-state&#13;
students are able to pay in-state tuition fees as opposed&#13;
to out-of-state fees (which are obviously much&#13;
higher) in order to get them to attend and keep them&#13;
attending Parkside.&#13;
Finally at the end of the school year, the left over&#13;
seg. fee money is dealt with. If there is any left over&#13;
money at the end of the year, it is put into a "bucket,"&#13;
as Menke calls it. The money from this bucket is then&#13;
put towards the next year. By doing this, it lessens the&#13;
seg. fees that students will be paying the following&#13;
year. The process then starts over again the next year,&#13;
meaning all the left over money from the "bucket"&#13;
is taken into consideration, the allocated and nonallocated&#13;
fees are examined and SUFAC will determine&#13;
the new amount to be paid for seg. fees by all&#13;
students not exempt from paying.&#13;
Congrats on a great&#13;
season, ladies!&#13;
Good luck in the&#13;
GLVC Tournament!&#13;
Segregated fees, what does Parkside use them for?&#13;
Doria DeBartolo&#13;
debar004@ u wp .edu&#13;
Segregated university fees (SUF)&#13;
are charges, in addition to instructional&#13;
fees, that are assessed to all&#13;
students. These fees support student&#13;
services, facilities, activities, and programs&#13;
here at UW-Parkside. This&#13;
year full time students paid $1,016 in&#13;
SUF charges for the year. Although&#13;
overall tuition costs differ between&#13;
resident and nonresident students,&#13;
SUF charges remain the same. Since&#13;
last year, these charges have increased&#13;
from $988 for each student per year.&#13;
There a few cases in which students&#13;
are not required to pay these&#13;
segregate fees, including many student&#13;
athletes, international students,&#13;
and military veterans. Although all&#13;
military veterans are exempt from&#13;
paying these fees, this does not automatically&#13;
apply to all international&#13;
students and athletes. Each case relies&#13;
on specific scholarships offered.&#13;
When these fees are waived for one&#13;
student, the fees for that person are&#13;
subsequently dispersed onto the remainder&#13;
of the student body who are&#13;
subject to paying this part of tuition.&#13;
There are two types of SUF charges:&#13;
allocable and non-allocable.&#13;
Non-allocable fees are not subject to&#13;
change. They support fixed financial&#13;
commitments, including contracts,&#13;
debt service, and the university student&#13;
service programs. They cover&#13;
the costs of facilities such as the&#13;
Student Health and Advising Center&#13;
and the new weight room in the&#13;
Student Activities Center. Allocable&#13;
fees support student activities and&#13;
programming and are, however, subject&#13;
to change each year. Segregated&#13;
University Fee Advisory Committee&#13;
(SUFAC) is responsible for allocating&#13;
these monies to student organizations&#13;
such as WIPZ, Ranger News, Rainbow&#13;
Alliance, and PSG.&#13;
Before the closing of the Child Care&#13;
Center last year, which was funded&#13;
by allocable SUF, there was a dispute&#13;
in regards to where the funding was&#13;
coming from. It was noted that the&#13;
majority of the people who were using&#13;
this facility were not UWP students,&#13;
but UWP faculty and staff. There were&#13;
only around 30 students using the&#13;
Center, and the rest were all faculty&#13;
members. Student body president Annalee&#13;
Sepanski, who sat on SUFAC last&#13;
year, commented that "Our main concern&#13;
was why are we [students] paying&#13;
for something that is used mostly&#13;
by faculty?" She added that last year&#13;
there were almost 1,000,000 dollars of&#13;
requests from student organizations,&#13;
but SUFAC only had about 100,000 to&#13;
give. SUFAC bases their budgeting decisions&#13;
on presentations of individual&#13;
budgets by student organizations at&#13;
their meetings. SUFAC also has policies&#13;
to follow. For example, only a percentage&#13;
of money may be applied towards&#13;
student travel, as it is preferred&#13;
that most activities are happening on&#13;
campus. There are also penalty fees&#13;
applied to the budgets of student organization&#13;
who present late. &#13;
The Ranger News&#13;
November 6,2013&#13;
Letter from the editor&#13;
University of Wisconsin Parkside Student Newspaper&#13;
900 Wood Road&#13;
Kenosha, WI53141&#13;
Phone: (262) 595-2287&#13;
Fax: (262) 595-2295&#13;
E-mail: rangernews@uwp.edu&#13;
Editor in Chief:&#13;
Staff Reporters:&#13;
Copy Editors:&#13;
Photographers:&#13;
Designers:&#13;
Maggie Lawler&#13;
lawle020@uwp.edu&#13;
Jimmy Gibbs&#13;
gibbsO 14@ uwp .edu&#13;
Doria DeBartolo&#13;
debar004@uwp.edu&#13;
Katlynne Davis&#13;
davis086@uwp.edu&#13;
Michael Jensen&#13;
jense089@uwp.edu&#13;
Carl Rollmann&#13;
rollm001@uwp.edu&#13;
Raymone Pajarillo&#13;
pajarOOl @uwp.edu&#13;
Maggie Lawler&#13;
lawle020@uwp.edu&#13;
Hannah Emery&#13;
emery004@ uwp .edu&#13;
MISSION STATEMENT:&#13;
THE RANGER NEWS STRIVES TO INF ORM, EDUCATE,&#13;
AN D ENG AGE THE UW-PARKSIDE COMmunity&#13;
BY PUBLISHING WELL-WRITTEN, ACCURATE&#13;
STUDENT JO URNALISM ON A BI-WEEKLY&#13;
BASIS, AS WELL AS ONLINE.&#13;
The Ranger News meetings are every Friday&#13;
at noon in MOLN 107. All students and faculty&#13;
of UW-Parkside are welcome to attend.&#13;
Have any comments, concerns, questions, or&#13;
story ideas? Please e-mail us at: rangernews@&#13;
uwp.edu. Like to meet with us? We are located&#13;
in the Student Center in room L101A.&#13;
Wow you guys, we haven't had a chat in quite some time.&#13;
To be honest...I really missed you. We had a very long dry&#13;
spell over summer, and now we're just getting back to print&#13;
in November? It'll be worth the wait, I promise. And I dont&#13;
break promises. Like, I'd be the perfect person to make an&#13;
Unbreakable Vow with (from Harry Potter for you muggles).&#13;
But anyway, enough about that. I'm just really excited&#13;
to be back in print, and I've got some fun things to discuss&#13;
with you.&#13;
The Ranger News wants you! We do! I don't know if&#13;
you've glanced at that staff column to the left of this fine&#13;
block of text, but our numbers are dwindling. It's sad, really,&#13;
because the paper is finally getting good again! You said&#13;
it yourselves...I didn't make that up. My mom also told me&#13;
that, but whatever. If you like to write, come write for us!&#13;
We're a really fun group! Sometimes I even bring cookies&#13;
to the meetings! Don't like to write? Fine! Can you point a&#13;
camera and take non-blurry photographs? You can? You're&#13;
hired! Artists! We're always looking for comics and graphics&#13;
to run in the paper. Show us your stuff, we've been to the&#13;
Rita! We know you've got mad skills. Guys, TRN is an organization,&#13;
and orgs look really good on future resumes. Go&#13;
ahead, ask your bosses, I'm sure they all worked for a college&#13;
newspaper in their past. If they didn't, I'm sure they had a&#13;
really hard time getting the job they currently have. They're&#13;
probably not even qualified to be your boss, let's be honest.&#13;
I'll drop that, for now, but just think about it. Don't mind&#13;
me, I'm just planting the seed and hoping you all grow into&#13;
beautiful TRN flowers.&#13;
What else happened recendy? Halloween! I hope you all&#13;
had a super spooky day, I know I'm still coming down off&#13;
my candy high. Want to see something scary? Take a look&#13;
at my blood sugar. Ba dum tsss. I didn't dress up this year,&#13;
because I was actually laying out this very newspaper on&#13;
Halloween! But if I were to dress up...I'd probably go as the&#13;
greatest newspaper editor that ever lived. Or maybe that pug&#13;
that dressed up like Miley Cyrus' wrecking ball music video.&#13;
I say the pug did it becamse I'm sure that was its own original&#13;
idea, with no outside help from its owner.&#13;
Are you still reading this? I'm impressed. I assumed you'd&#13;
take one look at this chunk-o-words and flip on over to the&#13;
back page for a couple laughs. Speaking of laughing, we've&#13;
got some really great additions to the newspaper this semester.&#13;
You're going to love them all. For starters, we're doing&#13;
horoscopes! The planets are in order, young Ranger, and&#13;
you're very impressed!&#13;
What else can I throw at you guys? We've got an advice&#13;
column! Make sure you check that out. It's real advice from&#13;
the wonderful staff Doc answering real student questions!&#13;
Skeptical? Don't be, he's got a PhD in divinity AND sass.&#13;
As always, we'd love to hear some feedback from you&#13;
and see how you think we're doing. Positive comments&#13;
are our favorite, but negative comments are welcome,&#13;
too. Just don't be too mean, we do have feelings, after&#13;
all. Our contact information is listed to the left, again.&#13;
Something else you'd like to see in the paper? Tell us!&#13;
More importantly, share this newspaper with everyone&#13;
you come across. I expect to find these bad boys laying&#13;
all around the southeastern Wisconsin area. Hair salons,&#13;
restaurants, banks, grocery stories. Go ahead, we approve&#13;
of littering, as long as it's TRN littering. That was a&#13;
joke. Give a hoot, don't pollute.&#13;
Last but not least, I just wanted to thank you all, from&#13;
the bottom of my heart, for picking up our newspaper&#13;
and reading it every issue. You're the reason we do this.&#13;
Don't let the interns fool you, they don't do this for the&#13;
grade. They do it because they love ink-stained hands.&#13;
As long as you keep reading, we'll keep writing. Have a&#13;
spectacular week, Rangers, and please enjoy.&#13;
Wednesday November 6&#13;
Landscapes Jean F. Lanners Collection**&#13;
9:00AM-4:00PM&#13;
E. H. Mathis Gallery&#13;
Story Rangers&#13;
11:00 AM-12:00PM&#13;
Walnut Room&#13;
Friday November 8&#13;
Arts &amp; Humanities Visit Day&#13;
8:00AM-2:00PM&#13;
The Rita&#13;
Sunday November 10&#13;
A Salute to Our Veterans&#13;
3:00PM-4:30PM&#13;
Main Stage Theatre&#13;
Wednesday November 13&#13;
Science Night&#13;
7:00PM-8:00PM&#13;
Greenquist 103&#13;
Thursday November 14&#13;
From the Mississippi Delta to Chicago:&#13;
The Blues and the Two Postwar Africa&#13;
7:00PM-8:30PM&#13;
Library Overlook Lounge, L2&#13;
Friday November 15&#13;
Noon Concert:&#13;
UWP Flute and Saxaphone Ensembles&#13;
12:00PM-1:00PM&#13;
Bedford Concert Hall&#13;
Visiting Artist Series: Pallude Musica&#13;
7:00PM-8:00PM&#13;
UW-Parkside, Bedford Hall&#13;
Saturday November 16&#13;
Saturday Info Session&#13;
9:00 AM-11:00 AM&#13;
Student Center&#13;
Monday November 18&#13;
Arts &amp; Humanities Day&#13;
8:00AM-2:00PM&#13;
Rita Tallent Picken Center&#13;
**Gallery will be open all month. &#13;
November 6,2013 The Ranger News 3&#13;
Quoth the raven, Poe Open Mic was fantastic tribute to great literature&#13;
Parkside guest speaker on climate change and energy policy in America&#13;
College Republicans invite representative from E&amp;EI Energy and Enterprise Alex Bozmoski to speak on campus&#13;
over to the microphone to mournfully&#13;
cry, "Nevermore!". Both myself and the&#13;
other audience members found ourselves&#13;
laughing, almost spitting out our&#13;
apple cider.&#13;
Other participants included Jill&#13;
Miatech from the Kenosha Public library,&#13;
who was more than excited to&#13;
read some of Poes lesser known works.&#13;
Chernouski took the stage again to read&#13;
the chilling poem "Annabel Lee", which&#13;
was followed by a reading of some personal&#13;
poetry that had been written in&#13;
response to Poes work. Afterwards,&#13;
Chernouski teamed up for a second&#13;
time with another fellow English major&#13;
Katie Abbott for what was arguably&#13;
one of the nights most creative performances.&#13;
Chernouski read a short poem&#13;
while Abbott stood slightly to her side,&#13;
signing the poem simultaneously in&#13;
American Sign Language. Both received&#13;
a hearty applause from the audience&#13;
for their unique rendition of Poes&#13;
works.&#13;
When those who had formally&#13;
signed up to read were finished, others&#13;
were invited to peruse any available&#13;
books for works that struck their&#13;
fancy, or just to socialize and enjoy the&#13;
delicious apple cider and cookies. All&#13;
in all, the Poe Open Mic event was a&#13;
great opportunity to further explore the&#13;
mystery behind Edgar Allan Poes masterpieces&#13;
while celebrating the written&#13;
word. Not such a dreary event after all.&#13;
Sorry Poe!&#13;
ties have already taken place, it all isn't&#13;
over yet! If you're interested in the Edgar&#13;
Allan Poe Big Read series, head to&#13;
the UWP library for a complimentary&#13;
copy of "Edgar Allan Poe: Great Tales&#13;
and Poems", or check out the UWP library's&#13;
website for more information.&#13;
Don't become "insane with long intervals&#13;
of horrible sanity"! Learn how to&#13;
avoid this situation by reading some&#13;
Poe!&#13;
Katlynne Davis&#13;
davis086@uwp.edu&#13;
"Once upon a dreary Oct. 18 evening,&#13;
Parkside students, weak and weary, gathered&#13;
in the dim light of the Den to ponder&#13;
over many quaint and forgotten books of&#13;
lore."&#13;
Ok, so it's not as good as Poes masterpieces,&#13;
but the reference was unavoidable.&#13;
The Poe Open Mic event, held in the&#13;
Den on Friday Oct. 18, invited students&#13;
to come and read the works of American&#13;
literary legend, Edgar Allen Poe. As&#13;
a part of the UWP and Kenosha libraries'&#13;
Big Read series, the Poe Open Mic was&#13;
one of many events held on campus celebrating&#13;
the haunting poems and fiction&#13;
of Edgar Allan Poe. Hosted by the international&#13;
English honor society Sigma Tau&#13;
Delta-Tau Psi, Parkside students, faculty,&#13;
and others gathered together in the Den&#13;
to hear some of Poes classic works read&#13;
aloud.&#13;
With the lights dimmed and raven&#13;
decorations perched throughout the&#13;
Den, the atmosphere was eerily appropriate.&#13;
English major and Sigma Tau Delta&#13;
member Sarah Towle began the event by&#13;
reading some interesting biographical&#13;
information about the author. Poe, who&#13;
was born as Edgar Poe in Boston, MA. in&#13;
1809, led a life full of difficulty and misery,&#13;
and it is easy to see that these themes&#13;
are reflected in his writings. He died in&#13;
1849 under mysterious circumstances,&#13;
leaving many to speculate that alcohol,&#13;
lis&#13;
passing. After some background information,&#13;
Libby Chernouski, president of&#13;
the Tau Psi chapter of Sigma Tau Delta,&#13;
alongside fellow English major Sara Tickanen&#13;
delivered an entertaining and rather&#13;
hilarious reading of Poe's most famous&#13;
poem, "The Raven". Tickanen grabbed&#13;
the audience's attention as the speaker&#13;
of "The Raven" wonders who is "rapping&#13;
at his door". Once the raven was introSome&#13;
great readings from the last Poe event. Photos courtesy of Sara Tickanen. chernouski chimed in&gt; leanjng&#13;
Doria DeBartolo&#13;
debar004@uwp .edu&#13;
On Oct. 23 E&amp;EI Energy and Enterprise&#13;
Initiative director of strategy&#13;
and operations Alex Bozmoski gave&#13;
a presentation that was open to all&#13;
students and faculty; he was invited&#13;
to speak on campus by the College&#13;
Republicans student organization. He&#13;
spoke briefly about rising concerns on&#13;
the risks of climate change, and went&#13;
on to explain his campaign's solution&#13;
to this growing problem.&#13;
Bozmoski believes that humans&#13;
are in fact a significant contributing&#13;
factor to climate risks, while some&#13;
people believe that climate change is&#13;
a government conspiracy. He went&#13;
on to mention that in recent polls&#13;
65% of republicans say that America&#13;
absolutely should or should probably&#13;
take steps to combat climate change.&#13;
He also says that "the majority of republicans&#13;
actually want an answer to&#13;
climate change, but no one is giving&#13;
it to them." He believes that this is one&#13;
of the reasons the Republican Party is&#13;
currently losing this debate.&#13;
EPA regulations and government&#13;
subsidies are among some of the steps&#13;
that America has taken to fight climate&#13;
change. Bozmoski believes that&#13;
the "climate policies we currently have&#13;
in place don't work, and they cost a&#13;
lot of money." Basically, "our government&#13;
is deciding which companies&#13;
should succeed and throwing money&#13;
at them, while deciding which companies&#13;
should stop polluting and forcing&#13;
them." He went on to say that the US&#13;
government will be telling individual&#13;
power plants and eventually refineries&#13;
how many pollutants they may omit.&#13;
After a short overview of the current&#13;
steps this country is taking and will&#13;
be taking, Bozmoski stated that "every&#13;
economist in the world will tell you&#13;
this is precisely the least efficient way&#13;
to reduce pollution." He adds that this&#13;
plan will amount to "between a 100 and&#13;
300 billion per year loss in GDPT and&#13;
explains that "all of these companies&#13;
are losing money, and all of that money&#13;
isn't going to anything good." He also&#13;
said that it isn't that Obama has intentionally&#13;
chosen the worst possible plan&#13;
to put into effect, but he feels he can't&#13;
get anything passed through congress,&#13;
so he is just working with what he has.&#13;
Bozmoski concluded his presentation&#13;
by explaining what he believes to&#13;
be the best solution to this growing&#13;
problem in two parts: 1. get rid of energy&#13;
subsidies and 2. change what we tax.&#13;
He says that "we are currently taxing&#13;
one of the only things that we can&#13;
all agree we want more of - income."&#13;
He goes on to say that if we want more&#13;
income and less pollution, then we&#13;
should have a carbon tax rather than an&#13;
income and capital gains tax. "It doesn't&#13;
matter if you believe that this is a real&#13;
risk or not. As long as you can admit&#13;
that you might want less pollution it&#13;
makes more sense to tax pollution," he&#13;
adds. E&amp;EI Energy and Enterprise Initiative&#13;
believe that by taxing pollution&#13;
will allow the economy to grow, there&#13;
will be less pollution, and we will see&#13;
more jobs.&#13;
In an example, he discussed the competition&#13;
between geothermal and coal&#13;
companies, in which case "coal is getting&#13;
a free ride. They are putting all of this&#13;
carbon into the air and not paying for it."&#13;
Geothermal can't compete, so they go to&#13;
the government for subsidies. Bozmoski&#13;
says that if you made fuels accountable&#13;
to their cost, you get rid of the argument&#13;
for subsidies that clean fuels have by creating&#13;
a "fair playing field" for all competing&#13;
fuels. "It becomes a market where&#13;
clean fuels compete against dirty fuels,&#13;
and dirty fuels pay for their dirt."&#13;
Bozmoski believes that this is the&#13;
"most pro-growth, liberty enhancing,&#13;
small government solution to climate&#13;
change that is out there. If conservatives&#13;
got behind it, the American people&#13;
would overwhelmingly choose this versus&#13;
the taxes that the EPA will be promoting".&#13;
&#13;
The Ranger News does not affiliate with a&#13;
political party, and covers both sides objectively.&#13;
&#13;
SAVAGLIO&#13;
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dispensary and choose from the latest in&#13;
fashionable eye wear. We carry both affordable&#13;
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• Red eye • Pink eye • Foreign b ody removal&#13;
• Urgent care/emergency visits&#13;
Doria DeBartolo&#13;
debar004@ u wp .edu&#13;
On Saturday October 26th University of Wisconsin Parkside celebrated 13 years of involvement&#13;
in national Make a Difference Day. This year, Parkside set a school record with&#13;
a whopping 208 student volunteers who participated in the event. This is nearly 100 more&#13;
students than last year, and over 60 agencies were invited by Parksides Volunteer Program&#13;
Committee to submit specific project requests.&#13;
This national day is sponsored by USA Weekend Magazine who started the event over 20&#13;
years ago to encourage people to lend a hand in their communities. In recent years, there have&#13;
been close to 3 million participants nationwide on every fourth Saturday of October.&#13;
Thanks to all of the helping hands, Parkside was able to complete 17 projects for these community&#13;
non-profit organizations, whilst providing a total of over 600 hours of service. Project&#13;
sites from this year's mission included Windpoint Lighthouse, Petrifying Springs Park, River&#13;
Bend Nature Center, Racine Literacy Council, Racine Zoo, Nifty Thrifty, Becker Shoop, Pringle&#13;
Nature Center, Racine Urban Garden, Girl Scouts of Southeastern WI, Cerebral Palsy&#13;
Agency, Stand Down Kenosha, Halo, City of Kenosha-Lincoln Park, Habitat for Humanity,&#13;
and Village of Sturtevant.&#13;
Many of these projects consisted of ground cleanup and construction. Students at sites&#13;
such as Women and Children's Horizons in Kenosha sorted donations of clothing and household&#13;
goods for victims of violence and abuse. The Student Nurses' Association at Parkside&#13;
(SNAP) also provided blood pressure checks for veterans at Stand Down in Kenosha.&#13;
Every year Parkside awards the student organization with the highest number of participants.&#13;
The Make a Difference Day 2013 Outstanding Participation Award went to the PreHealth&#13;
Club coming in first place with a total of 27 participants. In second place with 24&#13;
participants was the Pace Student Nurses at Parkside, and the Parkside Basketball Team came&#13;
in third place with a total of 21 team members who participated.&#13;
Parkside student Hannah Kowalczyk was assigned to assist with clean-up at the Racine&#13;
Urban Garden along with other Pre-Health club members. She commented on her first experience&#13;
as a volunteer on Make a Difference Day, "It was a blast. This was my first year participating,&#13;
and I'm looking forward to doing it again next year."&#13;
Join the Student Volunteer Program on Campus Connect to view more photos of this year's&#13;
event, and get news about upcoming events such as Blood Drives and the Spring Volunteer&#13;
Event. You may also record your individual or group/organization volunteer hours online&#13;
at campusconnect.uwp.edu and be recognized by the President of the United States for any&#13;
amount exceeding 100 hours of service.&#13;
For more information about the Parkside Volunteer Program or to sign up for any upcoming&#13;
events contact Lynne Eedy, Nicole Hernandez, or Casey Jones at Student Activities - LI04&#13;
located in the Student Center - or through e-mail at uwpvolunteerprogram@yahoo.com. Make A Difference Day photos by Ray Pajariilo.&#13;
3916 67th Street, Kenosha, WI 53142&#13;
Phone: (262) 657-7850&#13;
docsavaglio@wi.rr.com&#13;
www.savagliovision.com fl #&#13;
Show your University of Wisconsin ID to receive:&#13;
30% off glasses and 15% off contact lenses!&#13;
restrictions apply &#13;
November 6,2013 TheRa^Ti^&#13;
Ender's Game leaves audience with disappointing dialogue and sad special effects&#13;
bored with the dialogue he's spewing out. Its&#13;
difficult to watch knowing that in the book, the&#13;
brief twenty minutes I had the luck to listen to,&#13;
Valentine, Ender's sister played by Abigail Breslin,&#13;
has more character development than she&#13;
does in an entire film. She's been set aside for&#13;
a number of strange interactions between Ford&#13;
and Viola Davis' character, Major Gwen Anderson.&#13;
There were moments of laughable dialogue&#13;
in every interaction between every character.&#13;
Even the film's finale was a broken work, where&#13;
Butterfield had the chance to shine, and you can&#13;
tell he wanted to, but the script just held him&#13;
back. What hurts the most out of a film like this&#13;
is that the potential is there to be not only good,&#13;
but seriously memorable. It's hard to watch&#13;
so many young actors butcher lines that were&#13;
slaughtered long before they started filming.&#13;
The special effects, the added bonus of seeing&#13;
a film like this, are also lack luster and untamed.&#13;
Swarms of ships are attacking Earth, but all we&#13;
can see are the same swirling vortexes we've&#13;
seen in films like Wreck-it Ralph and others.&#13;
The entire opening sequence is a rip off of the finale&#13;
of Independence Day. There is a video mind&#13;
game Ender plays, and it looks horrible, not in&#13;
the shocking and delightful way we all hoped it&#13;
might. The universe is not spectacular in Ender's&#13;
Game, and that's an issue, especially when we&#13;
have films like The Tree of Life, and even 2001:&#13;
A Space Odyssey, that manage to make the universe&#13;
more chaotic and beautiful than Ender's&#13;
Game. It's not atrocious, but it's not bad enough&#13;
to be good, and it isn't good enough to be good,&#13;
either. We know there's no such thing as a great&#13;
adaptation, but at least other films manage to&#13;
capture the essence of a story. Ender's Game&#13;
misses the point, and it wastes not only the potential&#13;
of its young stars, but it throws out the&#13;
possibility of being something great in a time of&#13;
mediocrity.&#13;
Guest Writer DM Haight&#13;
Dmhuniversal@gmail.com&#13;
Recently I began listening to the audio book of&#13;
Ender's Game. I was fortunate in that I happened&#13;
to see the film before I began listening to what I&#13;
assume will be a great space opera in literature.&#13;
Why am I fortunate? Because seeing the movie and&#13;
thinking back on the development of characters&#13;
and story, I can safely say that the twenty minutes&#13;
or so of listening was more entertaining and more&#13;
engaging than the entire two hours of the Gavin&#13;
Hood helmed train wreck of a narrative.&#13;
Its not that Ender's Game is a poor movie. Honestly&#13;
I'd have to say that if I were asked to watch it&#13;
again, say after video release, I would. But I would&#13;
keep in mind that it is a muddled down, sickly&#13;
scripted film with very few moments of interest, of&#13;
which none are truly earned. The film follows the&#13;
story of Andrew "Ender" Wiggin, who happens to&#13;
be something of a tactical military prodigy. He's a&#13;
young boy in a world where children rule the ranks&#13;
of the armed forces because their minds and ideas&#13;
have yet to be bogged down by reality or a lack of&#13;
imagination. Ender is a child who is constantly bullied,&#13;
one who is smaller than those who would have&#13;
him expelled from a program he doesn't necessarily&#13;
want to be in. He is in position to be the commander&#13;
of Earth's tactile forces against an enemy of&#13;
insect quality. They have attacked his planet before,&#13;
and now Earth's leaders seek to insure that does not&#13;
happen again. Ender is promoted and sent to learn&#13;
battle techniques on a space station orbiting Earth&#13;
where he excels, makes allies, builds strategies, and&#13;
makes few enemies.&#13;
It is not the premise that is lacking here. It could&#13;
very well have spawned into a franchise of films&#13;
that may have had the potential to broaden the science&#13;
fiction genre and touch on unseen territory&#13;
in terms of themes like child violence, burgeoning&#13;
sexuality, unfathomable responsibility, genocide,&#13;
murder, and the ramifications of one's past or fuPhoto&#13;
courtesy of disneydreaming.com.&#13;
ture actions. We could have seen an incredible film that&#13;
delved into the mind of a child coming to grips with what&#13;
he is expected to do, or one that has to deal with a fragile&#13;
psyche under the pressure and watch of an entire military.&#13;
Instead Hollywood has decided to bypass all of that, has&#13;
decided to avoid new territory, and has elected to give us a&#13;
film that is indecently plodding, actionless, unmoving, and&#13;
poorly scripted.&#13;
The script is actually the most incredible piece of depressing&#13;
I've had the pleasure of analyzing. Asa Butterfields&#13;
lines are just so uninspiring, and even Harrison Ford seems&#13;
Pokemon fans will enjoy the new features in Pokemon X and Y&#13;
Guest Writers Jon Barajas, Trevor Henkel&#13;
Pokemon X and Y marks the debut of the Pokemon series to the 3DS. The&#13;
sixth generation of Pokemon games introduces a number of new things that&#13;
both longtime fans of the series and newcomers will love. With the game now&#13;
having 3D graphics, battle sequences are more detailed not only regarding attacks,&#13;
but also depending on where you're fighting, as each area has its own&#13;
unique feel. This makes for battles that are both viscerally exciting and visually&#13;
engaging.&#13;
Changes to the fights aren't strictly graphical, as X and Y introduce several&#13;
new battle types. Players are now able to partake in sky battles that can only be&#13;
performed if both players have a flying type Pokemon in their party. Another&#13;
form of battling involves the player encountering a horde of wild Pokemon instead&#13;
of just encountering one. These hordes usually have five Pokemon of the&#13;
same kind, though there are also instances where there will be more than one&#13;
different Pokemon within a horde. The other form of battle thats introduced&#13;
in the game is called inverse battling. Inverse battling is essentially the same as&#13;
regular battling, only now attacks that are usually super effective against the opposing&#13;
Pokemon are now not very effective, and vise versa. These new combat&#13;
systems keep battles from feeling repetitive.&#13;
On top of better variety of graphics and more battling styles, there are also&#13;
more personalized things the player is able to do. Possibly the most significant&#13;
change on the character level is that, for the first time in a Pokemon game, the&#13;
player is able to customize their appearance. The player is able to get their hair&#13;
styled and colored, pick out clothing, and get colored contacts to change their&#13;
eye color. While the player is still able to buy a bike in the game, they're also&#13;
able to purchase roller skates with which the player can perform various tricks&#13;
that can get them into hidden locations. With trainer customization and roller&#13;
skates, the player has a more unique way to explore the region of Kalo.&#13;
What seems to be the most compelling part of the new Pokemon has little to&#13;
do with the new creatures or new environment, but the social aspects the game&#13;
seems to promote. The series has always been about battling and trading your&#13;
Pokemon with friends, but there was never a convenient way to do so. With&#13;
Photo courtsey of metrouk2.&#13;
Nintendo's 3DS system, players are easily able to identify when their friends are&#13;
online, as well as notice any players within the immediate area. The ability to&#13;
interact with these players - friends and strangers alike - is just a single button&#13;
press away. In the past, it had been a long, exhausting effort to even trade Pokemon.&#13;
Players would have to go to a specific location in the game which usually&#13;
involved going out of their way in the single-player mode. Now, two players&#13;
could be sitting on a train with their game, and be able to challenge each other&#13;
to a battle without leaving their current adventure.&#13;
Being able to see players in the immediate area has turned public areas like&#13;
UW-Parkside into hubs for Pokemon trainers to interact and compete. Where&#13;
some players will choose to give items to nearby students, others have gone to&#13;
more competitive means. Gamers like Adam Berg thrive on the competition&#13;
within campus and attempt to challenge every nearby player to a battle. On the&#13;
opposite side, players like Molly Krasel have founded communities that focus&#13;
on trading and collecting Pokemon.&#13;
With the increase in social aspects, as well as the various new features in the&#13;
game, numerous fans of the original Pokemon Red and Pokemon Blue games&#13;
have returned to enjoy the nostalgia of collecting and battling Pokemon. Only&#13;
this time, they get it to enjoy it alongside their friends. &#13;
Progress and the future:&#13;
a brief chat with PSG&#13;
Jimmy Gibbs&#13;
gibbs014@uwp.edu&#13;
Recently I had the opportunity to sit down with Dustin Beth, the&#13;
Speaker of the Parkside Student Government. With the first semester of&#13;
this school year at the half-way mark, I thought it would be good to talk&#13;
with the PSG about the new year, how they felt about it thus far and what&#13;
their prospects for the future were. One of the very first things said during&#13;
our sit down was, "This is the most transparent Student Government&#13;
we've had since 2007."&#13;
When asked about the goals of the current PSG, Speaker Beth said&#13;
they have three main priorities. The first is to provide transparency to the&#13;
student body. They do so by making the PSG and particular PSG members&#13;
more readily available to students then they have been in the past.&#13;
One of the ways in which they are accomplishing this is by moving their&#13;
senate meetings to noon on Mondays (a dead hour when no classes are&#13;
in session) instead of the old time of 5 p.m. when it was harder for students&#13;
to meet with them. Second, PSG is working on maintaining fiscal&#13;
responsibility by making sure that the allocated Segregated Fees students&#13;
are paying are being utilized in the most efficient way possible so that&#13;
students will be getting a "better bang for their buck." And their most&#13;
important goal, according to Beth, is providing and upholding student&#13;
rights and advocacy for the students.&#13;
Another aspect that PSG is continuing to work on is striving to create&#13;
a better accountability for student organizations in order to produce a&#13;
This month's sports in pictures&#13;
Photos by Ray Pajarillo.&#13;
WIPZ Radio: their&#13;
road to an FM license&#13;
Doria DeBartolo&#13;
debar004@uwp.edu&#13;
The staff of Parkside's WIPZ Radio has been working toward obtaining&#13;
their FM license since spring semester of 2013. "UW-Parkside is the&#13;
only UW school that doesn't have a FM license for its radio station," says&#13;
station manager and student body President Annalee Sepanski&#13;
Sepanski recognized that obtaining this license is something "that can&#13;
greatly benefit the student body as well as the community, and with&#13;
the support of her colleagues, she decided to begin moving forward in&#13;
pursuit of it in June of this year. She realized it was going to be a rough&#13;
road after her second meeting with several UWP faculty members, including&#13;
Steve Wallner and Dean of Students Tammy McGuckin. She&#13;
also spoke briefly with Chancellor Deborah Ford on separate occasions.&#13;
WIPZ presented the administration with a request for funds needed to&#13;
pursue the license. The administration soon concluded that applying for&#13;
a license would be "a gamble," and there is no guarantee that WIPZ will&#13;
be approved. Their request for funding was ultimately turned down.&#13;
WIPZ media coordinator Terry Havel got a quote from a friend to&#13;
install a radio tower for $2000. Sepanski met with the administration&#13;
once more to present this offer. She was told that UW-Parkside could&#13;
not engage in a contract with this specific engineering company because&#13;
a deal had been made between Terry and a friend who worked with the&#13;
company WIPZ was then told by the administration that they would&#13;
continue searching for a company to do the installation. Eventually, a&#13;
telecommunications company that worked with NPR offered to do it for&#13;
$2000.&#13;
WIPZ knew that the UWP administration would not be willing or&#13;
able to cover any of the costs. Sepanski approached SUFAC, the Segregated&#13;
University Fee Allocation Committee, in an attempt to receive&#13;
funding from the contingency fund, but her request was also denied&#13;
because "a member of SUFAC felt that I could work our current budget&#13;
well enough to make things work." Like many other student organizations,&#13;
the WIPZ budget was cut by over 50%, decreasing from $28,000&#13;
to only $12,500 for the year. After mandatory expenses are covered,&#13;
Sepanski says, "We will only have $2000 to work with for everything&#13;
else, including repairs and promotions." WIPZ also sent out solicitation&#13;
letters to request sponsorship; however, the tax number required to proceed&#13;
with these requests was received too late and the opportunities for&#13;
sponsorship were subsequently lost.&#13;
"We finally just decided to absorb things, because we feel obtaining an&#13;
FM license will ultimately benefit [us] more than anything," commented&#13;
President Sepanski. After the long search for funding, Sepanski and the&#13;
rest of the WIPZ staff decided to make the payment out of their current&#13;
budget from SUF (Segregated University Fees) dollars, and to make cuts&#13;
to promotions as well as other plans they had for the school year: "We&#13;
have paid for it but there are things that we will have to sacrifice."&#13;
WIPZ's application is currently being worked on by technical consultants,&#13;
and they are now waiting to submit it to the FCC for the final&#13;
approval, while also waiting on the approval from the UW System. "The&#13;
FCC hasn't opened up the window yet where we need to submit our&#13;
approval because of the government shutdown, and as of right now the&#13;
decision is in their hands," says Sepanski. WIPZ will hopefully be approved&#13;
for one of two frequencies currently available in the Kenosha&#13;
area.&#13;
Sepanski also added that, "It is a good thing for students to be informed&#13;
of what is going on." Student support for WIPZ is crucial, and&#13;
in the end it is our money that paid for the license.&#13;
The Artisan Craftsman Establishment i s UW-Parkside's art club,&#13;
also known as ACE for short. The organization's goal is to become&#13;
a resource for artists on campus by promoting them, connecting&#13;
them to the local art scene, and helping them prepare for life as&#13;
an artist after school. The club has two meetings during the fall&#13;
semester. The main meeting is on Mondays at 10am in Rita D113,&#13;
the Fibers/Metals studio. The meeting gets repeated on Tuesdays&#13;
at 5pm in the same room. Like our Facebook page for art opportunities,&#13;
ACE events, and meeting minutes. (https://www.facebook.&#13;
com/ArtisanCraftsmanEstablishment)&#13;
better image of the organizations. They have also been working on building&#13;
and maintaining better relationships with several of these organizations,&#13;
including our campus radio network WIPZ and The Ranger News&#13;
to name a few. They will also be hosting a town hall summit in the very&#13;
near future that will allow students to attend and express any questions&#13;
or concerns that they may have for members of the PSG.&#13;
Beth is also very happy to report that the current PSG is made up&#13;
of the highest amount of freshman class members that they have ever&#13;
had, which will lead the way for more opportunities for younger incoming&#13;
students. All in all, the meeting is best summed up by a quote from&#13;
Speaker Beth: "We are on our way to a better Parkside Student Government&#13;
and improving life here at Parkside." &#13;
November 6,2013 The Ranger News 7&#13;
Weekly Horoscopes - See what the stars have in store for you!&#13;
Scorpio (October 23-November 21): Isn't November like&#13;
your birthday month or something? It's your month and&#13;
you can cry if you want to. Oh, wow, you're crying because&#13;
you have seven papers due? Sorry...just, let it out. There&#13;
there.&#13;
Sagittarius (November 22-December 21): You're feeling&#13;
frustrated after you spent your weekend following a Cheeto&#13;
crumb on your GPS. But don't worry, maybe all that time&#13;
being lost in Nebraska did your mind some good. Still seeing&#13;
corn? Never mind, then.&#13;
Capricorn (December 22-January 19): Apparently you&#13;
took your role in the Parkside play a little too seriously,&#13;
Capricorn. Stop trying to convince everyone that your&#13;
name is Earnest. The cast didn't believe you then, and they&#13;
really don't believe you now.&#13;
Aquarius (January 20-February 18): In a Halloween frenzy,&#13;
you stuck your head in a pumpkin and ran around your&#13;
neighborhood pretending you were the Headless Horseman.&#13;
Take two Advil four times a day, that migraine will go&#13;
away eventually.&#13;
Pisces (February 19-March 20): Pisces: Spring semester&#13;
schedules! Have you talked to your advisor yet? Whoa, just&#13;
kidding. Didn't mean to cause a panic attack there. Hey,&#13;
seriously. Are you okay? Breathe into this paper bag and&#13;
relax. You'll be just fine.&#13;
Aries (March 21-April 19): Did Halloween get you all excited,&#13;
Aries? Well take it down a notch. This week you'll&#13;
realize that things have gone too far when you dress up in&#13;
your younger sister's Power Ranger costume and get into an&#13;
argument with one of your neighbors about how the Pink&#13;
Ranger was by far the coolest of the bunch.&#13;
m,&#13;
x&#13;
T&#13;
Taurus (April 20-May 20): There is something dark and&#13;
ominous in your future, young Taurus. Nope, wait. There's&#13;
just something wrong with my Magic Eight Ball. I cannot&#13;
predict now, so concentrate and ask again later.&#13;
Gemini (May 21-June 20): After that stress induced panic&#13;
attack in which you jumped on top of a table in the library,&#13;
stuffed your poorly written midterm paper in your mouth,&#13;
and beat upon your chest like Tarzan, you finally realize&#13;
that therapy is working for you. Keep up the good work.&#13;
Cancer (June 21-July 22): The arrangements of the planets&#13;
this week provide some interesting foresight into your future,&#13;
dear Cancer. No, really, if Uranus gets any closer to the&#13;
sun, there's going to be some pretty explosive fireworks. In&#13;
other news, stay away from the sun.&#13;
Leo (July 23-August 22): Thinking about trying to seduce&#13;
your crush this week, Leo? First thing's first: head on down&#13;
to the courthouse and let's get that restraining order lifted!&#13;
Virgo (August 23-September 22): Ever feel like you're all&#13;
alone in the world and nobody understands you? These&#13;
feelings will finally be realized when your parents get sick&#13;
of your freeloading nonsense and ship you off to Finland&#13;
where, in fact, you will be all alone with no one to understand&#13;
you.&#13;
Libra (September 23-October 22): Thankful that all that&#13;
Halloween candy is in your past? Here's another thing to be&#13;
thankful for, Thanksgiving! Better stop at the store and pick&#13;
up some maternity pants...you too ladies...tis the season of&#13;
overeating.&#13;
X&#13;
I&#13;
Dear Doctor Jimmy, Advice for all your questions and concerns!&#13;
Good morning scholars! During the busy, hectic, stressful, and sometimes frustrating&#13;
times we call semesters, it isn't hard to get overwhelmed. Maybe you're sitting&#13;
in your dorm room, maybe you're festering in your parent's basement, or possibly&#13;
even the living room of the apartments you rent with several others, and it hits&#13;
you: I need some help! Finally there's a place for you to turn. Doctor Jimmy is a new&#13;
addition to the Ranger News staff, and he is making himself available through the&#13;
inter-webs to help students with any problems they may have. Any students with&#13;
problems seeking advice or answers can find Doctor Jimmy's page on Facebook at&#13;
facebook.com/askdrjimmy. Seek him out, and you may just see your advice turn up&#13;
in the Rangers News' new advice column!&#13;
Dear Doctor Jimmy, .....&#13;
So...I have this friend who's having marital problems. He found out recently that&#13;
his wife was talking to someone else on Facebook and planning to meet up with&#13;
this person to have sex. How should he handle this situation? A divorce? Or try to&#13;
work it out? Help, Doctor Jimmy!&#13;
-Concerned Friend&#13;
Dear Concerned Friend,&#13;
This is, indeed, a troubling situation. I feel for your friend: having a significant other&#13;
cheat on you, or conspire to cheat on you is up there with some of the major crushing&#13;
blows to esteem and overall mental well being, however, an actual spouse is even&#13;
worse Vows were made, and, unfortunately for your friend, the vows were conspired&#13;
to be broken. I, also, just recently had an associate go through a very similar sitaation;&#13;
he was not married to the woman, however. I will give you and your friend the same&#13;
advice I gave to him. It's time to get down to brass tacks, the divorce seems the only way&#13;
to go in this situation. It sounds harsh, after all there is always marriage counseling&#13;
but the bottom line is his wife was involved in relations with another through social&#13;
media and had full intentions of meeting with that person to take the relations to the&#13;
next physical level. Now, since this couple is not involved in the rek&#13;
swinging based on what you've told me here, his wife was caught cheating. There are a&#13;
lot of problems married couples can have and they can always be worked&#13;
cheating is just not one of them. If he did try to work this out and stay with his wife, he&#13;
would have to realize his options; one would be that there simplyus no worhng ^ou&#13;
wife had intentions of cheating on him and the only thing that&#13;
. ww,»,, r « x; -XT..&#13;
ture, but time and the plethora offish available in the sea, as they say, heals everything.&#13;
-Doctor Jimmy&#13;
Dear Doctor Jimmy,&#13;
I make more money than my boyfriend, so all of my friends are convinced&#13;
he's just dating me for my money! We never even talk about finances,&#13;
and he takes me on plenty of dates. He seems to genuinely love&#13;
me, so that can't be true, right?&#13;
-Miss Money Bags&#13;
Dear Miss Money Bags,&#13;
It seems these days that friends are all too willing to give advice about&#13;
our relationships when it hasn't been asked for. Ive even seen friends&#13;
give friends advice when told it wasn't wanted. I like to blame it on the&#13;
overwhelming amount of reality TV focused on uneducated early twentysomething's&#13;
creating drama in whatever way they can. It's like giving a chef&#13;
a frying pan and a bag of rock salt and telling him he has thirty minutes to&#13;
wow his viewers or they'll cut his fingers off, cursing him to a life of never&#13;
being able to wield a spatula effectively again. Facing those circumstances,&#13;
he's going to give us something. However, I digress, back to your problem.&#13;
So your friends say your boyfriend is only in it for the bacon you're bringing&#13;
in? Tell them to shove it and leave the real diagnosing and advice giving&#13;
to the professionals. If you feel like the guy really loves you, and everything&#13;
is going well, then who cares who makes more money? It sounds to me like&#13;
your friends may be suffering a bit of post S.M.S. or Sugar Momma Syndrome,&#13;
as we refer to it in the field. They've been shafted before by a man&#13;
looking for a few extra gifts here and there, and now they are tainted and&#13;
think any woman that makes more money than their significant other is&#13;
being used. That's just not the case. And it sounds to me like you and your&#13;
boyfriend are aware it's not the case. So disregard the comments of your&#13;
friends, and continue enjoying what you have.&#13;
-Doctor Jimmy &#13;
Selling meth to pay for college, what Breaking Bad has taught us ail&#13;
Maggie Lawler&#13;
lawle020@uwp.edu&#13;
Like most college students, I weep when I see&#13;
how much tuition costs. If it gets any higher, we&#13;
won't even be able to afford our ramen. So let's&#13;
think about the positive messages we're learning&#13;
from today's media. How can you go from&#13;
broke to rich in a matter of months? Well, Mr.&#13;
White, after you put some pants on we can go&#13;
over the fine arts degree you'll need to pursue.&#13;
What? No. I'm not talking about Studio Art.&#13;
I'm thinking bigger than that. Bigger even than&#13;
Picasso's blue period. I'm talking about that&#13;
blue crystal. Grab your lab coats and follow me&#13;
down the wonderful rabbit hole known as meth&#13;
cooking.&#13;
Now I know what you're thinking, "I've seen&#13;
Breaking Bad, and it didn't end up okay for&#13;
Walter!" And to that I would reply, "ARE YOU&#13;
FREAKING KIDDING ME?" Let's take a look&#13;
back at what happened. If you haven't seen the&#13;
end of Breaking Bad yet, stop reading. There are&#13;
spoilers ahead. Walter didn't die because of meth,&#13;
you might have missed the part where he had terminal&#13;
cancer. What any college student wouldn't&#13;
kill to be making all of that...what's the word&#13;
Pinkman? Cheddar? The entire TV show had me&#13;
wishing I'd paid better attention in science class.&#13;
High school is something I've tried to tune out&#13;
for the most part, but all I can really remember&#13;
from chemistry is my teacher threatening to take&#13;
my cell phone away and not give it back. And that&#13;
was back in a time where smart phones were just&#13;
s"" cience&#13;
] B itch&#13;
a drear.&#13;
I mean, yeah. There's definitely some danger&#13;
involved if you're going to become a drug lord,&#13;
but you don't have to go as deep as Heisenberg&#13;
(although a clever nickname is required). The&#13;
key is to get out before you bury yourself in hundred&#13;
dollar bills, although that's very tempting.&#13;
Settle for a swimming pool full of twenties. Fifties&#13;
and hundreds just make you seem greedy.&#13;
I guess what I'm trying to tell you is that college&#13;
is expensive, but we've only just scratched&#13;
the surface. There's an entire world out there full&#13;
of dirty drug money, and it's waiting for us to go&#13;
out and find it.&#13;
Ranger News Rave Reviews!&#13;
"The Ranger News really shuts it down."&#13;
- The Government&#13;
"I want to plagiarize this newspaper!"&#13;
- Rand Paul&#13;
The Ranger News wants YOU!&#13;
I&#13;
Do you liko writing?&#13;
Do you like photography?&#13;
Come to our meetings on Fridays at&#13;
12:00pm In The Ranger News office&#13;
for more information!&#13;
UW-Parkside Books: In Memoriam&#13;
Guest Writer Andy McDonald&#13;
andy.mcdonald@huffingtonpost.com&#13;
Every year, new school semesters begin, and with that comes the demise&#13;
of academic books that we all hold so dear. These are books cut&#13;
down probably before their time, in the prime of their tenure. Maybe&#13;
there were more misspellings than usual, maybe the editor s name wasn t&#13;
the right font size, or maybe the publisher needed a new edition to help&#13;
pay for their own kid's college education.&#13;
Regardless of how these books came to their bookend, we celebrate&#13;
the academic texts we lost last semester.&#13;
Also, as you're reading this, you should be humming the song "People"&#13;
by Barbra Streisand, and picturing each book as if it was it being&#13;
featured in a Ken Burns documentary. Lots of slow zooms and fades.&#13;
1. Philosophy&#13;
'What The F*** Is The Point?' And Other Pertinent Life Questions&#13;
2. Chemistry&#13;
Breaking Bad As Academia: Making Meth For Credit!&#13;
3. Physics&#13;
The Higgs Boson Particle Is Nonsense And Other Completely Solid Scientific&#13;
Theories Which Are As Good As Law&#13;
4. Politics&#13;
Mitt Romney &amp; Paul Ryan: How They Won And What We Can Learn&#13;
From It&#13;
5. Literature&#13;
Nicholas Sparks' Transformers&#13;
6. Extra-Terrestrial Science&#13;
Bowing Down To Our New Supreme Alien Overlords: A Course In E.T.&#13;
Etiquette&#13;
7. Writing&#13;
Writing For Lifetime Movies: "Nobody Believes Me!"&#13;
8. Journalism&#13;
10 Reasons Why 10 Reasons Are The New Reasons To Study Journalism&#13;
9. Sports Medicine&#13;
Steroids: Just Do It. </text>
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