https://archives.uwp.edu/files/original/feaa44bb1f59c80b0b775e6d60d1df72.pdf ca0fc984e93100aea315208d21160eb7 Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource University of Wisconsin - Parkside Ranger News Description An account of the resource Student newspaper of UW-Parkside Text A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text. Issue Volume 35, issue 11 Headline Used for newspapers, the Headline element describes the main article of the issue. Celebrating Black Legacy, Oral Tradition, Social Justice and Youth Empowerment Series Number The series number of the original collection. UWPAC124 Ranger News Text Any textual data included in the document The ~Ranger ,/News , 'tv of Wisconsin~Parkside's Student Newspaper UrllyerSl ,, . " .. ...- ... , ~. '-' . News.......................... 3 The Wallstreet Journa·IC~·;;; ..~·~·E..:·: · Opinions & Editoriols p d,lion 7 ~~~c~ii~;~ ..:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::'~ ~ 900 Wood Road Kenosha. WI 53144 Money Changes Everything part 2:A further look at how organizations plan to spend student fees STORYAND GRA~RS BY PRESTON BROWN The 2005-2006 budgets for student organizations are currently being deCided, a decisi~n which effects how :nuch student run organizations can grow, educateand provide for the Uw-Parkside community. Since Wisconsin state statute 36.09(5) allows students control of a portion of their own funds, the Parkside Student GovernmentAssociation (PSGA) uses this power to fund student organizations. Moneyfor these organizations is requested each year in a Student Allocation Fee committee(SUFAC) hearing. SUFAC is a subcommittee of PSGA, which reports its recommendationsto the student senate for a tina) vote. Student organizations areawardedtheir budgets based on their proposals, estimated monetary need, and potentialto enrich the educational experience in the eyes of the voting PSGA senators. The followinggraphs are a representation of the four major categories that each organizationrequested money for. Stipends refer to mone~ given to members as paymentfor their work. Events. conferences and operational costs are the other major categories. These basic categories encompass a variety of requests, so if anybody has funher questions, you can contact the organizations represented at their respective ",(ensions,or The Ranger News at rangemews@uwp.edu for a detailed breakdown. Black Student Union """ --- -- Student O.... nlzatloM COuncIl t~ "'" 51'" "'" ---- , 7" ,,'" p.rlcsldel-..-1 Club neRan_- - ... rangernews@uwp.edu ,.- , February 18 , 2005 Master storyteller, also known as the "Verballllusionis"" Tejumolo Ologboni speaks on February 2 In Upper Main Place. Celebrating Black Legacy, Oral Tradition, Social Justice and Youth Empowerment BY NICHOLAS MICHAEL RAVNlKAR "You can take the boy out of the country, but you can't take the country out of the boy," he said. "And you can take the African out of Africa. but you can't take the Africa out of the African." Tejumola Ologboni lived up to his pseudonym as the Verbal Illusionist, carefully embedding facts into his aphoristic commentary as he played to the crowd of over fifty students and faculty gathered in Main Place on February 2. Part of the Black History Month kickoff, Ologboni followed presentations by other speakers-from the UW-Parkside community. Marin Rocha, Rita Thomas, Jason Pinkowski, Samantha Collier and Dayvin M.A. Hallmon responded to the question "What does Black History Month mean to me?" Ologboni broke down everything from dialect to rhythm, alluding to the current obstacles still before our society. "When Black folks say 'jive: it's not pronounced 1-1-V-E. We pronounce u jaov. J-A- V," he said. Ologboni went on to discuss the ethnological differences in musical structure. Rhythms of European derivation have a three-count, he said, whereas African-styled rhythms go "on the one and the two." He also brought the audience back to civil-rights era Milwaukee. "When I lived on 14th street." he said, "if you were black you couldn't go south of State street. The police would harass you. They'd say, 'Where you going, nigger?"" Although the circumstances of racial discrimination have admittedly changed, Ologboni made clear that, while things ntight be 'better,' there are still many battles for social equity that must be fought and won. "No matter what we have done or what we are ahle to do," Ologboni said, "We've been standing on the shoulders of giants. And some of those giants, we've never even heard of. There are names that make it to the history books. But many of them get left out." He pointed to Ella Baker's organizing work in the 1930's south as one of the pivotal contribution to the civil rights movement. Turning the audience's attention to some of the commonly circulated Eurocentric misconceptions and mythologies about African culture, he highlighted the emblematic writing systems of Ghana and the Zulu traditions. Though many historically considered African culture to be illiterate. Ologboni exposed this as a convenient, racist fallacy. In addition, he discussed the historical role that African oral traditions have had on medical and technological advances. from the application of salicylic acid (crude asprin) in plant form to smallpox vaccination to the development of the light bulb filament. His concluding remarks were no less inspiring: ..lt's in your hands. The only thing that's powerful in any society is its young people. The only thing that old people like me create are hydrogen bombs. You know, things of destruction. Young people are idealists. They create the changes." • Events OfficeSupplies/Operotionol (osts • Stipends • (onventionsjTrovel -;:~~-------::;~~.~---- ~ The State Makes Q] THE WALL STREET JOURNAL Triumphant Return ,... Page 14 • 2 The Ranger News February 18, 2005 Letter From The Editor Dear Readers: It's funny how looking back over the past issues of The Ranger News brings memories - things our staff has struggled with and things our staff has improved. As we continue to grow as an organization, we continue to face new challenges. The reason I find it so interesting is because it's not always the same challenges we face. In fact, it never is. Since my time as editor-in-chief of the newspaper, we have constantly been facing challenges. During the past year we've overcome staff recruitment and retention problems, Jack of productive meetings problems. and relevant article content problems. That's not to mention many isolated problems that were interweaved throughout the entire time. Problems equal challenges, and challenges equal opportunities to learn and grow. At this point, the operating system is well in order for The Ranger News, and our staff is doing a fantastic job and excelling at what our organization strives to do. But like I said, different challenges continue as time allows us to grow. And not just for the newspaper, but people who work for it also. Especially myself. The most recent challenge for myself dealt with our staff reporting names in the Police Beat. I have also heard many opinions on whether people like that we are providing the names or not. The tricky part for me has been breaking down the reasons that concern the whole subject of the names. For the record, I suppose it started with me encouraging our staff to get as much information as possible for each story - at least covering the who, what, when. where, why. and how. That's reason number one names have been provided. Various community affiliates have asked me about my ability to edit the names out, simply because I have the power to. I don't edit them out, because I do not have a reason to do so. If I cannot explain to my staff why I'm changing something when it comes across my desk, I will not change it. Because I base my actions directly on reasons, I sometimes find myself challenged by the thoughts and opinions of others. There are always going to be people who don't like something the newspaper prints. But paraphrasing Bill Cosby, I'm not exactly sure the sure way to success, but the sure way to fail is to try to please everybody. So I know at some points throughout my college career, and life, people are going to disagree with my actions. The only thing I can do is break down the reasons as much as possible. Facts are facts, and opinions are opinions, and separating the two isn't very hard if reason is used.! will continue to encourage the staff of The Ranger News to get all the information they can. (Note: if we are choosing what information to publish or not to publish, we are being biased and less credible - the only way to stay in the clear is publishing all the information our staff gets.) Students and readers can decide for themselves whether they like the information or not. In other news, I'd like to welcome back The State, written and created by the Satirical Writers Guild. The State and The Ranger News have a contract signed where The Ranger News has no editorial control over The State. The Satirical Writers Guild has their own editor-In-chief that can decide the content policies for their organization. The Ranger News and The State simply share benefits (much like The Ranger News and the Wall Street Journal Campus Edition). Any opinions on The State can be sent to "100 Words or Less" at rangernews@uwp.edu. In fact, any opinions about anything can be sent to" 100 Words or Less," We definitely won't hold back from publishing what anyone on campus has to say, even if it is against The Ranger News. Please note our March production schedule has changed. Instead of printing on March 4 and 18, we will be ~ombining the two is.sues to come out on March 11. This is going to give us time to rework the newspaper and bring It up to yet another higher level as we continue to make it all it can be. In the meantime, thanks for reading. f I , I Henry D. Gaskins Editor-in-Chief (orr.dions for '''rvar, 4 Issue The front page article entitled "Money Changes Everything" was missing a byline. The article and graphs were written and created by Preston Brown. , Ad SII.... d P,I(.. I' 1/16 p.: 2" lIorz. xS'VeIl. 1/8 Page:4' Iforz. x 5' Vert. 1/4 Page}5' x 8' Vert.01"8"x S" lion:, 1!2Page;8"'x ID" lion:. or 5'x Iil'Vert. fuN Poge: 10'HorL X 16' VerI. DoulJla PlIge Spr8Qd:1D" x 16' {x2} ReIIICIlnlng Iss.,.-".,l Mo\'lh II April I, IS, 29 Moyl3 $28.00 $45.00 $65.00 $110.00 5195.00 5350.00 Jose Santiago refen;ed to on page 16 was actually Jose San,chez. If)'DU nQtl':~.informationthu( needs C(Jrr~CtiOll;·plebe e-mail !lUl8i'fll.~s@u"'p.odu. Th,oJ< you, RANGER STAFF Editor-in-Chief Henry D. Goskins News Editor Tol Goldwoter Business Manager Sonyo Gonzolez Staff Writers Joson Griffes, Nilk Borns, Tyron Soffold Jr, Andrew Krupp, Chris Rosin, Nitk Honelk Sherry Nelson r Assistant Editor Preston Brown Arts & Culture Editor Nicholos Michoel Ro,nikor Advertising Manager A,i Grewol Copy Editors Amondo Amoson Andy Weslbrook Graphic Design Manager Mon Gonyo Photograph Staff Advisor Judith Logsdon DOnlelYoris I Mon Cote ffi The Ranger News has meetings every Mondoy Otnoon All studen~ and faculty of UW.Parkside are welcome. Please feel free 10anend. Have any comments. COncerns, questions. or Story ideas? ' Please e-mail us at: rangemcws@uwp.edu . • We are located at Wyllie D-139C A$$O(lA,tIl) Phone: (262) 595·2287 Fax: (262) 595-2295 "'Q)tU($1Al[" Adveni'iemenlY: I1WP_ads@Yahoo.com - The Ranger News is a student-produced Pllblf~atJon of the University of 'W)l;Consin_ ~arkslde an~ docs not necessarily represent, In w~~le or In pan, the views of College admmISlOltOr5, fuculLy or studentS. Thi Do February ___ 18 Black History Month 12:00 PM: OMSA Fun Friday, Wyllie Hall D182 3:30 PM: Book Study: 'Potiki', Union 207 19 Black History Month 1:00 PM: Women's Basketball vs. Indianapolis, DeSimone Gym 3:00 PM: Men's Basketball vs. Indianapclis, DeSimone Gym 20 Black History Month 11:00 AM: UW-Parkside Athletic Hall of Fame Banquet, Union Dining Room 21 12:00 PM: Master Plan Listening Session, Union 104-106 5:30 PM: Master Plan Listening Session, Union Square 22 10:00 AM: Study Abroad Fair, Upper Main Place 12:00 PM: Master Plan Listening Session, Union 104-106 5:30 PM: Master Plan Open House, Union Square 8:00 PM: Hip-Hop Knowledge Bowl, Union 104-106 23 10:00 AM: Study Abroad Fair, Upper Main Place II :30 AM: Master Plan Listening Session, Union 104-106 12:00 PM: Noon Concert: McKeever Duo, Com. Arts Theatre 12:00 PM: Discussion: 'How Others See Us', TBA 9:00 PM: Foreign Film: 'Whale Rider', Union Cinema 24 7:30 PM: Movie: Emmitt Till, Greenquist 103 7:30 PM: Foreign Film: 'Whale Rider', Union Cinema 25 7:30 PM: Parkside Theatre: 'Machinal', Augie Wegner Studio Theatre 7:30 PM: Foreign Film: 'Whale Rider', Union Cinema 26 10:00 AM: Kenosha Expo, Perretti Fieldhouse 1:00 PM: Women's Basketball vs. Lewis. DeSimone Gym 3:00 PM: Men's Basketball vs. Lewis, DeSimone Gym 5:00 PM: Foreign Film: 'Whale Rider', Union Cinema 7:30 PM: Parkside Theatre: 'Machinal', Augie Wegner Studio Theatre 8:00 PM: Foreign Film: 'Whale Rider', Union Cinema ;. �--NEWS ----= febrUary 18, 2005 The Ranger News 3 ..--- Names: To Print or Not To Print BY JASON GRIFFES On February 4· at noon The Ranger News distributed their second paper of the spring semester to the campus of UW-Parkside. This issue included a new Police Beat section which integrated the names of seven offenders that had been issued citations. This newly styled Police Beat replaced the quirky joke style of its predecessor of the fall semester. On the same day, about an hour later, at the I p.m. Parkside Student Government Association meeting, PSGA issued a resolution in opposition to The Ranger News' decision to print those names. This resolution detailed the reasons for PSGA's opposition to the decision made by The Ranger News. The resolution itself said it would be forwarded to the Cbancellor and the Associated Press. The vote for the resolution passed through the Student Senate with overwhelming results. This session ended with 15 senators for the resolution, two against, and one member abstained. After the meeting, over the weekend, the editor-in-chief of The Ranger News, Henry Gaskins, learned of the resolution and was provided with a copy of it. "I wrote my response ...how I would respond since I am the leader of The Ranger News. I presented PSGA's resolution and my response to the staff in our meeting [Monday the 7] and we voted unanimously on the response." The response that Gaskins said detailed contradictions to the points offered in PSGA's resolution and indicated that the printing of names would continue. "The resolution is saying that we [the senate] feel that the students don't want their names to be in the paper for incriminating offenses," stated Nick Henning, President ProTempore of the Senate. Henning went on to say, "they [the students] feel we're a closed community and many students that attend the university are from the area. It seems that putting this in the paper would make it more of a gossip column." Henning also made the point that the Senate is aware that they can't stop The Ranger News from printing the names in the paper. "We are aware of the first Amendment and The Ranger News' right to print the names but we think that just because you have the ability to do something doesn't mean that you should:' "Everybody knows everybody and we don't think that everyone should know everyone else's business." The Resolution, according to Henning, is "Just a recommendation from the Senate it is not something they [The Ranger News] have to do." The decision was not easily reached by the Senate, and talks which had begun in a previous meeting were carried over to the meeting on February 4, when the vote for the resolution was passed. The original decision to print the names of offenders by the Ranger News was made a few weeks earlier. "One thing I always encourage our writers to do is get as much information as possible, the fundamentals ofjournalism are who, what, when, where, how, and why. This is what 1 encourage our writers to do," stated Gaskins. "If staff members want to get the information and get the names and it comes across my desk 1 have to print their work, unless I give them a reason that I'm not going to print their work." One worry of PSGA is that printing the names of offenders in The Ranger News will tarnish those offenders reputation. Gaskins response to this was, "Printing the names in the newspaper cannot have a greater effect than the incident itself. If a future employer wants to find out about your record they can, its open records." While neither PSGA nor The Ranger News has done any official polling, they have both asked around campus to get the feel of what students think:. "I know Senators went and talked to people they knew and asked [student opinions]," stated Henning. Gaskins also spoke to many students regarding the Police Beat. ''1' ve had a mixed reaction; a lot of people think it's really cool that we're doing it and I've had people come up to me and teU me it's a bad idea. and they would be embarrassed if their name was in the Police Beat." "1 have had professors tell me that it brings a more serious tone to the news paper itself, and I agree that it makes it more serious. What we used to do was throw in jokes, but now it's serious and that's what I like about it. 1certainly don't lean one way or the other about it being good or bad but I definitely think that it does bring a more serious tone to the newspaper," said Gaskins when asked about his personal opinion. While an agreement on the issue between The Ranger News and PSGA does not seem to be forthcoming in the near future, there has been some compromise reached. If an individual has been cited by the police and would like to have their name omitted from the Police Beat, they can come to The Ranger News office at Wyllie DI39C and request that their name not be printed. POLICE BEAT Data collected by Andrew Krupp January 21-Wilfredo Vale. Rlgoberto J...opez-Gomez, Christopher Sepulveda and.Alejo Sepulveda - CitlUions for UIlderage drinking 12.25 am. University ApartmenlS. January 27 Ross A. S<:hladwet1er and Anne M. Pokorny - Citations for undetage drinking - ~16 p.m. - Ranger Hall j~.28-~p. Vwat ~ftlIopetaDn8amotor~~ ~ lIlU .. ~todleKenQsbaCOllllJJ,aiI f 3.... __~'riifi·· ------------ ------ -----------. -;;--------~----~-~=--~·~·~-~-~-----------n;;""i;;;:;;:;;jrliiew:s-------=============~~~~r~~~~ February 18,2005 4 TheRangerNews _ OPEN DIALOGUE BY TAL GOLDWATER The Ranger News holds an open dialogue with various administrators in each issue. For this issue. the following questions were asked to the Director of Public Relations. Dave Buchanan. What do you do at UW·Parkside? I I "I am the director of public relations, which means Iget to say all the good things about student, faculty, staff, and so fourth," Buchanan said, "There are a lot of events that go on that I have the opportunity to talk to news media about. Ialso program the sign on [Highway thirty-one]. I also do just about anything that publicizes the university." Director ot Public Relations Dave Buchanan How do you bring attention to UW-Parkside community? "Other than news media, I have a good idea of what reporters are looking for when they go after a story." Buchanan answered. "With the internet there are so many more opportunities for us to publicize what goes on in the university. People aren't tethered to the newspaper anymore. They're not glued to the radio when they want to get news. They're not limited to television when they want to find out what goes on at Parkside. I work with all those media-with radio, television, newspaper. but I also work through the web. [It's] is an important part of what I do, because I distribute all my news releases via e-mail. No more paper. [There is old fashion method. which is get out in front of classes. This Monday, and Wednesday, I had the opportunity to talk Judy Logsdon's class about public relations and using public relations and how to become part of public relations." , j ~ \ l I ! I How can students find out information you are putting out? HI put it on the student server on the web site. a Listof , . . . d nts that go on at UW-Parkside. It's called, "Things acnvmes an eve . id "Th to Do at The D", in the student Iin-box.l Buchanan Sill, ey can look there every Thursday or Friday. Also, they can look at the website. All of our events that are coming up are listed. Anything I it as a news release can be seen 011 the website pretty easily, wne . dl listi There is a daily calendar. There is an upper listing an ower 1S ng of what going on today. They can look at The Ranger News because there is a lot of stuff The Ranger News covers about acuviues on campus. There are a lots of different avenues people can use. Th b i the biggest source as far as I am concerned, because e we IS . . h II basically everything I know is on the web." [The website IS IIp: www.uwp.edu/news/.] Eating Ramen Noodles, Panhandling, and Selling Your Soul BY SHERRY NELSEN Well, maybe things aren't this bad for students attending UW-Parkside, but students do undergo a great deal of stress and hardship in paying for the costs of college. The things students do to pay for college can range from working a parttime job to receiving financial assistance through lo~ns. Many sacrifices are made in order to obtain an education. Student Katie Marler explains, "You have to plan on when you'll be able to buy groceries, and when you'll be able to go on vacation. I've never had to save so much money in my whole life." Another student, Grace McKnight adds, "I have to use my time very well. I have to be very good at time management So Ican get my homework done, work 30 hours per week, and actually attend classes," For some students these sacrifices can be overwhelming. Michael Cyzak describes, "I feel like I am personally challenging myself to be the best I can. but sometimes 1just can't make the cut." However. positive aspects do emerge from students' struggles. McKnight pays out-of-state tuition with help from her family and student loans. She works at Starbucks as a shift manager in order to pay back her parents and her loans. She says of her experience. "I've learned a lot of responsibility. I appreciate my education much more." Marler works for Aramark on campus, as a tutor in the tutoring center. and serves as the secretary for Parks ide Adult Student Alliance. Marler says of her situation, "It teaches you to be frugal. You have to carefully plan out your days. That is making me more organized. which is helping me out with my classes." So why do college students endure all of these hardships? Marler left a job managing a dental office that paid $35,000 a year to come back to college. She explains, "I didn't feel like I had a voice to speak. I didn't feel like I was in a position to express myself or to give my opinion or to make what I think or what I do mailer With a college education you can '" you can make yourself known, and make yourself heard, and make a difference." Sometimes knowing that you'll be able to accomplish your goals makes all of the ~ardship worth it. McKnight explains, I am hopmg that once I graduate from college I can go to law school, and once that I'm a lawyer I can pay it all back.It would be worth it knowing that I can get to that level." Many students can agree that the need for money negatively influences their college experience. Cyzak explains. "l work two jobs in order to pay forthe car I need to get from home to school to work and back again. Working 30 to 40 hours a week at two jobs and taking IS to 18 credits has been the standard for me in college. Unfortunately, that leads me to have very little time to do anything, including homework." McKnight adds, "It takes time to budget your money, to make your money. So worrying and managing your money definitely takes time out of the time you could dedicate towards studying." Not only does money cause stress during college. but student loans linger long after graduation. Many students find their futures darkened by the reality of having to pay back their borrowed money. Mcknight observes, "[Student loans] already affect me in what I' m choosing to do. Rather than going on directly to graduate school, I'm going to take a year or two off to work full time and pay back Some of my student loans before moving on with my education." Cyzak adds, "I am not looking forward to student loans. [think they will cause me a lot of stress. I am not a fan of debt, but like most people, I can't afford to 'pay cash' for everything." For students planning to continue their education, loan repayment can sound especially intimidating. Marler comments, "It's going to be 10 years paying on an education. While I know it'S worth it, I wish there was another way. It's just daunting to know that I'm going to have debt forever". While college may seem like one. financial hardship after another, there" a Iight at the end of the tunnel. SomedaY we will lind careers, stop eating Ramen Noodles on a regular basis, and pay off our loans. Like our memories from college, Our education will remain with US "'I throughout our lives. Marler explains, just think that education is so imponuol. ueh and so valuable, and no mailer how In money you owe. nobody can ever take your education away from you:' -, 5 ~18,2005 Y -, oR! ScHUEBEL ByT tly PSGA, in correspondence with Recen • . . . nited Council, held a door slgnmg m theU pl e about keeping a low cap on what "~n ac . [VI d et increase is. A sufficient amount of thebu gtopped by to sign the door, while Chris peoples and Megan Sbuemnte, Public Relations Semenas , . th U . d C . GA belped out WIth e nrte ouncil to ofrs tudents aware of the situation. As for the makeStDave Koss, Vice President of PSGA stated, budge . th f very pleased With e outcome 0 the ,'Weare . ud et increase, which was a shockingly low five h g t." This figure was released by Jim Doyle, percen . Governor of Wisconsin, on Tuesday, February theT find alit more specific details one can log 8.0 . '/dhk http·//Www.wlSgov.state.wl.us an c ec onto . thenews links. . Upcoming is the State WIde Student Associationweekend, being held here at UWP kside from Friday, February 18 through S~day, February 20. There will be main agenda meetingsduring the everung of Friday, February 18, Saturday afternoon, and Sunday mormng. Another event that PSGA really encourages studentsto attend is being held in Main Place on Monday,February 28. This is a meeting is for all studentsto come and ask any questions they wish 10 state legislators. The event will begin at noon andend at about I :30 p.m. Many topics will be discussed. For example. gun control, financial aid, domesticrights, and the state budget. . On Friday, March 4 and Saturday, March 5, PSGA can take anyone interested, at no cost, 10 Madison with United Council. There many peoplecan show support behind their schools, andfor their budgets. Again anyone who signs upwill be able to attend with free travel and lodgingby PSGA. Please contact Dave Koss, vicepresident of PSGA in the PSGA Office down inWyllieHall across from Wyllie Market or at davekossS@yahoo.com or 262-595-2036. The Ranger News 5 Peer Health Educator Nina Brown Leads on a National Scale BY CHRISTOPHER ROSIN You may have seen Nina Brown helping to promote health awareness on campus over the last two years, along with the Peer Health Educators, such as the "Love Carefully" event taking place most recently, where condoms, literature, and other information on rnakinz D healthy cboices are passed out to the students at UWParkside, but Brown, a member of the largest studentbased organization in the United States, is actually the RegionaJ Representative for five states: Wisconsin, Illinois, Minnesota, North Dakota and South Dakota. Brown, a senior at UW-Parkside majoring in biology, is one of 12 members of a national staff covering 35,000 college students. She is involved with an organization called B.A.C.C.H.U.S (Boosting Alcohol Consciousness Concerning the Health of University Students). Peer Health Educators are the student representative voice for the organization. The General Assembly conference she attended last November, which takes place somewhere different each year, was held in Chicago last year, and she attended the previous conference, as well. After graduating from UW-Parkside, Brown plans to attend medical school. Also, her ambitions include creating a non-profit catering clinic for the homeless. «1 don't think bealthcare should only be for those who are pri vileged." In the past, Peer Health has sponsored many events on campus to promote overall health, including safe spring break kits, (with a drawing to win a Jeep Wrangler), alcohol awareness week, stress relief (during the time of finals), and many others. "A lot of people feel more comfortable talking to their peers than they would with someone such a counselor," Brown says, "and we talk about a lot of issues that they may have not had addressed by either their high school or their parents and are now coming into COllege, and sometimes this is where they'll get a sex talk or other information, and we just look out for the overall health of the university." As for upcoming events from the UW-Parkside Peer Health Educators, there will be an event where 15 guys and 15 girls - on a "first come" basis - will have two to three minutes to talk to each other, and they'll eventually talk to everybody in the room, with the whole purpose being to hopefully find someone they'll be compatible with. ''They do it a lot in Chicago. People pay hundreds of dollars to do it, but ours will be free." A date has not yet been set for the "speed dating" event, but coming up on February 16, Peer Health will sponsor a Singles Party in the Den at 8 p.m. "Basically, it's just going to be a place for single people to come and hang out, play garnes, and other things like that, but couples are welcome to come. too." Be sure to come by the Den tonight for the Singles Party, and keep your eyes open for the "speed dating" and other campus events sponsored by the Peer Health Educators. Angela Konkle (right), John Mielke (lett). and Joseph Mlneci (not Shown) serve as jUdges durrlng the ChIlI Cook-Off on February 14 in Upper Main Place. Chili Cook-off (H'm Good) BY GINNY ALWARD On February 14, there was the chili cook-off in . U r Main Place sponsored by the Employee Alumm A~:iation. The cost of a bowl of chili was $1. The. proceeds will benefit the Campus Beautification Project of the Alumni gardens at UW-Parkslde. First place went to Sharon Eaves' recipe. Eaves is the senior health nurse at the Student Health and Counseling Center. . The judges used a range of crit~ria in selectI~g th~ . f the competition. John Mielke from uruversrty winners 0 id h d ' I · d one of last year's winners Sal e oesn t re anons an . . h . hili th t makes him want to grab a fire extmguis er. like C I a . H id he was looking for "How the flavor first hits me. e~ f " Th feel the heat and the glow rom It. en you II • ed Angela Konkle, director of catenng, also serv . d She said she wanted her nose to run. She as ju ge. tho id 'The hotter the better for me. Look for some mg sal, different." . J h M' . . Chef for the Food Service osep mOOI, Executive .. . id "I want something original, but not another Judge, Sal , " too off the wall. And it has to taste good. . . ant had their own reasons for Each partrcip .. submitting their recipes for competItion. Third place winner and Computer Science instructor Timothy Knautz said, "I love cooking and I love chili." Knauntz made two recipes: his own Cactus Graze and Bear Essential Chili. Nicole Leipski submitted Brew City Chili for the judges' taste-buds. She said she participated in the cook-off because it's fun. Debra Karp, who teaches arts management, took second with her Black Bean Wintertime Chili. a vegetarian chili. She said she just wanted the "opportunity to get out and see people. It sounded like it would be a fun thing." An attendee of the chili cook-off, Roberta from the tine arts office said, 'There are too many choices. too much 10 eat. But I like that it goes 10 charity." Richard Kummings of the HR office had just one bowl only and said he's not going to try anything too hot. But he loves Chili to begin with, he said. Third year student John Dash thinks the chili cook -off is "a great activity. Ithink the Chili is out of this world." He tried Heather Miles' No Meat Chili. Branden Daval, a student, said. "I think it's good." He tried Uncle Louie's Chili made by Patrick leGUIre • .,. . ... . .. G 6 February 18, 2005 The Ranger NewS - University Book Prices: Interview with Steve McLaugWin BY CHRISTOPHER ROSIN Anyone who's ever purchased college textbooks has most likely fussed about the costly prices of books at one time or another-Including Elise Dunton, a student at UW-Parkside, who decided she had enough of paying for overpriced books and tried to start an alternative way for students to get the books they need through the campus website. Reportedly, Dunton attempted to use a "Pick Your Books" method, where students could obtain books for cheaper costs through this group on the UW-Parkside website. However, this allegedly involved a 56 fee for participating. Because the UW-Parkside server, which was designed for educational purposes. is slate-funded, it was in danger of a possible violation of network usage policies. The policies, according to Associate Vice-Chancellor Steve McLaughlin, came about in the mid- '90's, as the internet is a recent phenomenon, and can be accessed through the UW-Parkside website under a keyword search of 'Network Use Policies.' Basically, because there would be a profit for Dunton. the state-provided. taxpayer-supported UW-Parkside website cannot be used for profit or money-making. "The policy exists," says McLaughUn. "because the taxpayers supply the money to have that network. and so it would be an unfair advantage for Someone in a private sector or a similar business to have someone using the state-provided server to conduct business .: According to McLaughlin. he requested to meet with Dunton to discuss a possible network use violation. with the issue actually being that there was a profit involved on a state-funded server. "It had nothing to do with the appropriateness of her service, but the website can't be used for profit or enterprise, and J think that's where I was quoted as saying to 'Take it somewhere else;' if she wanted to use another carrier or server. I have no problem with the service-just not on a taxpayersupported website." In other words, her entrepreneurial effort or the concept was not in itself the problem - she just would have to use a server other than the campus website. As this is an administrative policy, it comes through computer network services, and g?es up through a chain of review, and eventually It ge~s ~oth~ chancellor's cabinet, where it becomes an adrnuustrauve policy, once it is approved. If someone wanted to change it, they'd have to start with computer network SUpp0l1. Steve Premeau. head of computer network. would most likely be son to contact. Premeau reports to the chief information officer and the chancellor's cabinet. When asked what he would suggest to students who are tired of the high cost of books, Mclaughlin says, "Well. there are a couple of things students can do. There certainly are other sources for textbooks: Ama:;on. Com is one. and there's others like Wal-ManCon1. I think there are cautions about those services. however. that you have to be careful about. like they may not have the most CUIl"COl editions. or they might not have a buy-back policy. So if ynu drop the course or don't use the hook, you could have a book you can't get rid of. There's also the shipping and handling. so there's all kind'S of things to be aware or:' In addition. he mentioned that the chancellor has formed a committee called the 'Textbook Study Group:' The committee will be comprised of three students, three faculty members, a dean, and a financial accountant. The chancellor has asked the student government to nominate six students, three of which will be selected to serve on this committee. This will look at the entire textbook issue and differcnr delivery models, and give a report at the end of the semester. Chris Semenas, PSGA President. is looking for interest and people who are interested should get in touch with him. "Textbook prices are always an issue, and continue to be so. The prices. and changing editions much more quickly than they used to:' McLaughlin says. "From the publishing industry's perspective, if you have a textbook for a specific class. it's a limited market. and there are numerous textbooks out there. but once you produce that first copy. the more you print, it \ not that much more expensive: so with a mass-sale book. like John Grisham, theyIl set lots of copies and make up I ; I I I , Adver ise with The R ger News The best way to get seen on campus I t 1 \ \ I \ ~ r \ 1 Contact our advert @ uwp_ads@yahoo.com - Dean 01Sludenls SIeve Mclaughlin on volume. whereas, a text in a limited market is not going to sell huge amounts, so that's how some of these prices come about." On a linal note, he adds, 'They've always been expensive: I remember complaining about them when I was a student many years ago. but it's also a concern for everybody, The committee's going to be looking at all of thil." but it's ready to go. We're just looking for the students to get involved and a few faculty, as well." POTENTIAL Premed students aren't the only ones with the to save lives. THE BLOOD CENTER ~ OF SOUTHEASTERN WISCONSIN ~ Domg more good than you know. • Maybe your pint of blood witl save an emergency victim. Maybe a leukemia patient. Or a premature baby, But first, you have to give, Pleaseparticipate in campus blood drives. Visit www.bloodcenter.com , or call1-877-BE-A-HERO to give blood now, THE WALL STREET JOURNAL ~!MJFlIJ~ ImJD)IT~IT@~L WSJ.com THE WEEK OF FEBRUARY 7, 2005 © 2005 Dow Jones & Company, Inc. All Rights Reserved. What's News In Business and Finance u.S. Can't Sue For Tobacco Profits A U.S. federal appellate court tossed out the possibility of a 5280 billion penalty against the tobacco industry, handing cigarette makers a major legal victory and putting Altria Group, the parent of Phillp Morris USA, a step closer to selling off its Kraft Foods Inc. unit. Justice Department lawyers had sought the sum at trial in federal district court in Washington, arguing that tobacco companies conspired to mislead the public about the dangers of cigarettes. The $280 billion is what the government claims tobacco companies made over three decades in sales to young smokers who became nicotine addicts. The Justice Department can continue its lawsuit, but some observers believe the tobacco companies now could be more willing to settle the case to get it behind them. In addition to the forfeiture of past profits, the government has been seeking court -ordered changes in industry practices, such as advertising restrictions, industry-funded smoking-eessation programs and bigger warning labels. Alma has been preparing to split itself into two or three entities when the tobacco-litigation environmentimproves.ln addition tn its tooacco assets, Alma owns about 85%of Kraft Foods, maker of Oreos and Oscar Mayer lunch meats. Cruise Lines Seek End to 'Outbreak' The cruise industry is proposing a new remedy of sorts for recurring outbreaks of onboard illnesses. A month into the industry'S busiest season, more than 1,100 passengers on seven ships have gotten sick. according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. At the current rate, the number of 00- board outbreaks in 2005will top last year's record of 37. Frustrated by the media covel" age that often accompanies such occurrences, the International Council of Cruise Lines, a trade group, has asked the CDC to eliminate the word "outbreak" from the agency's health reports. "If they used the words 'increased incidences,' it wouldn't be misreported by the media," says Michael Crye, the trade group's president. There's no sign that the latest illnesses are hurting bookings, which did happen in 2003 after negative All Germs On Deck Outbreaks of gastrointestinal illness, mostly norovirus, on individual cruises: 40 30 Reinventing the Child Star Fanning's Career Path Takes an Adult Turn; Less Pay, Big Credits 20 10 o 1999200020012002200320042005 (to date) Source: Centers for Disease Control and Prevention publicity from an outbreak. Cruise lines have tried squashing the virus with everything from stronger industrial cleaners and new sanitation regimens to installing antibacterial hand sanitizers near the buf· fet line. The CDC acknowledges that it is considering eliminating "outbreak" from its reports. But David Forney, chief of the CDC's vessel-sanitation program, says a change isn't certain. "We're not going to change just hecause the industry doesn't like it," he says. H -P's Carly Fiorina Forced to Resign Hewtett-Packard Co. Chairman and Chief Executive Carly Fiorina, after five and a half tumultuous years at the giant printer and computer maker, has been ousted by the board. Board members say they asked for the resignation of Ms. Fiolina, architect of a controversial $19 billion purchase of Compaq Computer Corp. that has failed to produce the benefits expected. In a statement, Ms. Fiolina, one of the most visible women in Amencan business and one of the few tn head a major corporation, said, "While I regret the board and I have differences about how to execute HP's strategy, Irespect their decision." When she joined H-P in 1999,she received a mandate to transform a Silicon Valley icon that had fallen behind its peers. Revenue soared, partly because of the 2002deal with Compaq. In November, the company reported fiscal 2004net income of $3.5 hillion, up 380/0 from a year earlier, while revenue at $80 billion was up 9%. But Ms. Fiorina was unable to boost H-P's stock price, which is down some 50%since her arrival, and the company's performance has Please turn to Next Page By JOHNLrPPMAN S he had acted with Sean Penn and Denzel Washington, and her paycheck had soared. Then she got the chance to act opposite screen legend Robert De Niro, her name biiled equally with his in many of the ads. She grabbed the role, though it meant a hig pay cut. That sort of thing often happens in Hollywood-except this actress is 10 years old. For a child actor, Dakota Fanning is acting, and marketed, like an adult. Her latest movie is "Hide and Seek," in which she stars alongside Mr. De Niro as a daughter who grows increasingly sinister in the wake of her mother's suicide. Although crttics pummeled the Rrated thriller, "Hide and Seek" opened to a solid $20 million at the box office in its first weekend, surprising Hollywood, given the movie's poor pre-release buzz. And she will playa leading role in one of this summer's most anticipated films, "The War of the Worlds," directed by Steven Spielberg and starring 'Ibm Cruise. The suicide, terror and R-rating of "Hide and Seek" may add up to an unusual environment for a child actor not even old enough to see the movie on her own in a theater. But the strategy for developing Ms. Dakota Fanning and Robert De Nlro in 'Hide and Seek.' Fanning's career has been different, ever since she hit Hollywood's radar four years ago in "I Am Sam," in which a mentally disabled Sean Penn fought for the custody of his 9-year-old daughter (Ms. fanning was 6 at the time). Most child actors end up in cutesy kid roles in family entertainment-think Macaulay Culkin in "Home Alone" (1990) and its sequel, the twins Ashley and Mary-Kate Olsen in the "Foil House" TV sitcom and their many Disney videos. Filmmakers employ them not so much to act, as to play themselves. With the exception of Jodie Foster and Drew Barrymore, few child actors graduate to foil-fledged aduit stardom-something Ms. Fanning'S business team clearly is aiming for. "They are positing her as a fully formed actress," says Hutch Parker, president of Twentieth Century Fox Film, which made "Hide and Seek" as well as "Man on Fire," last year's hard-edged drama in which Ms. Fanning played a kidnap victim whose bodyguard (Denzel Washington) fails to protect her. Part of the strategy comes down to billing credits. In Hollywood, the size of an actor's name, and whether it's placed above or below the title, goes a long way to determining his or her prestige. In posters and newspaper ads, marketers often place Ms. Fanning's name in a position equal, or almost equal, to stars who earn 10 times what she does. Mr. De Niro was paid about $10million for his role in "Hide and Seek," one-third of the movie's $30 million budget, people close to the movie say. Ms. fanning's representatives agreed to Please turn to Next Page What You Need To Succeed Be successful in class and your career with The Wall Street Journal - in print and online. Subscribe loday! Visitsubscribe.wsj.com/sludenl or coli1-800-975-8602 . • THE WALL STREET JOURNAL. Thousands of timely articles, salary tables and tools, plus 30,000+ jobs at the nation's hottest companies. , "'t~'~"~"')'~1"\'"~ ~ (02002 Dow Jones & Company, Inc. All Rights Reserved. OS'JDp= ----------~------~--- THE WALL STREET JOURNAL CM/!!¥1lJ8 ImK'J%ffill Telecom Mergers Cut Options T he ranks of the long-distance phone "Industry could he dramatically reduced now that SBC COmmunications has agreed to acquire AT&T and MCI is in talks that could lead to its heing acquired by Qwest or Verizon. The disappearance of AT&T and Mer would mean fewer choices and potentially higher prices for consumers and companies, after several years of multiplying options for phone and data service. Since the 1996 Telecom Act, millions of telephone users reaped the rewards of greater competition as the local pbone giants and long-distance companies invaded each other's businesses. In 1995, the average household spent $32.78 a month on long distance. Now, it is $13.70, according to TNS Telecoms, a Jenkintown, Pa., market-research firm. That all changed last year, when regulators dropped rules that required local phone companies to al· low competitors to use their networks at deep discounts to offer local service. If the mergers now in the works go through, local phone companies and cable companies that now compete to provide phone service also could start to behave like a classic duopoly in which neither side considers it worthwhile to start a war for market share. "The loser is the customer," says Brian Adamik, president of Yankee Group, a Boston-hased technology consulting firm. Many businesses, too, which have come to take dramatic price cuts for granted when they renegotiate their telecommunications contracts, could see those discounts shrink. Many companies could be left heavily dependent on one provider and be forced to change negotiating tactics on teiecom-service purchases. AT&T has about 24 million household customers and roughly three million busine~s clients. MCI serves roughly 14 million homes and about one million businesses. Other businesses argue that consolidation could bring some stability to the battered telecom sector. Arvind Sabharwal, director of global technology offices for GMAC Financial Services, says: "At this current level of consolidation, we should be able to benefit from that if . they execute correctly. In the longer view, if it gets down to one player, that would be a very strong concern to us." By Wall Street Journal staff reporters Shawn Young and Jesse Drucker Reinventing the Child Star Continued from Previous Page have her fee-which Hollywood agents estimate at about $2 million-cut to six figures. So some "Hide and Seek" ads put Ms. Fanning's name above the movie's title, a position reserved lor only major stars, others below the title. "These credits are 100% negotiated," says Peter Dekom, a well·known entertainment attorney. Another reason for Ms. fanning's marquee treatment: The studio, Fox, saw her as someone who could sell "Hide and Seek," based on the success of "Man on Fire." To be sure, some of the most successful child actors did venture into older-audience films. Around Ms. Fanning's age, Mr. Culkin starred in some PG or PG-13 dramas: Haley Joel Osment, who was 11 when he starred in the PG-13 1999thriller "The Sixth Sense," appeared in an R-rated drama, but it was only released in video in the U.S. But Ms. Fanning has already appeared in three R-rated dramas. Further, Mr. Osment didn't work at Ms. Fanning's furious pace: seven films since 2001, and three more over the next 18months. Mr. Culkin's output has trailed off (recently, the 24-year-old played a murderous, drug-crazed New York party organizer in "Party Monster"). Mr. Osment, 17, hasn't been in a movie since 2003, though his agent says he's "offered projects all the time." Discovered by a talent agent in Atlanta, Ms. Fanning did her first TV commercial (for Tid ) when she was 5 years old. The ily relocated to Los Angeles after her career took off. But while Ms. Fanning's family and associates have pushed hard in advancing her career, they've kept the reins unusually tight on her publlcity machine, insisting on privacy. News interviews are limited to a week before a movie opens, and the week after. She has never been photographed with her family. Her parents will not do media interviews. Ms. Fanning isn't told how much she earns (by law, 15%of her earnings are set aside in a trust), nor does she read reviews of her movies, adds Ms. fanning'S agent, Cindy Osbrink, One thing Ms. Osbrink doesn't see in her client's future: movies like "The Princess Diaries" or "The Lizzie McGuire Movie." "I don't see her as a big teen pop star at all," she says. "I see her in big, meaningful stories." What's News In Business and Finance Yet the work is doing exactly what it was intended to do-create a viral movement. On the afternoon following the Super Bowl, 240,000 unique visitors had visited llncolnfry. com or the fry's auction page on Yahoo, and 362 people had bid. Odds & Ends Sony COrp. said it will launch its PlayStation Portable hand-held videogame console in North Amer icaon March 24 for $249.The PSP is a big gamble by Sony that it can find a large audience for a mobile device that combines advanced game capabilities with movie and music playing features. The PSP went on sale in Japan on Dec. 12 and sold more than 800,000 units by the end of that month. Tbe device costs signilicantly more than other portable game consoles, such as tile $149 Nintendo OS. Sony is negotiating with movie studios to publish films on a small optical disc format used by the PSP. Tbe company also expects about two dozen games to be available around the time of tile PSP's introduction. Continued from Previous Page been inconsistent. Chief Financial Officer Robert Wayman was appointed interim CEO. Patricia Dunn, an H-P director since 1998,was named non-executive chairman McDonald's Tries For 'Viral' Buzz A Super Bowl ad featuring obsessive interest in a McDonald's french fry shaped like the 16th president drew a lot of puzzled looks from the tens of millions of people watching the big game, and a relative trickle of thousands went online to find out more about the spot. And that is just the way McDonald's likes it. The campaign, in which a man has found a fry that looks like Abraham Lincoln and aims to auction it online, includes a Web site called Iincolnfry.com that has fake blogs and a real-life Yahoo auction of the presidential snack, with the proceeds destined for the Ronald McDonald House charity. The effort is part of a growing marketing trend that increasingly tries Web promotions and other nontraditional approaches in hopes of building "viral" buzz spread by consumers themselves. Marketers and their agencies see that as one of the best ways of appealing to fickle but technology-savvy young men. The Super Bowl commercial drew some pans from industry observers. "It's the kiss of death in the Super Bowl for viewers not to understand your ad," said Carrie LaFerle, an advertising professor at Michigan State University. By Jay Hershey How to contact us: CampusEdition@dowJones.com AT COLLEGEJOURNAL.COM • Business schools need to better train students to manage corporate crises. • How to write top-notch thankyou letters after an interview. • A dream-job boot camp helps train new graduates to hone their search skills. DONIT DRIVE TO TOWN TO RENT! 300+ CHOICES and growing each month! Rent current movies on DVD ----4';~~ Machine is located in the Union Bazaar One Day ~2.10 ~1.0SEach Additional Day (up to 7 days) ,,~"_""'.!\_•. ': _.. >l.I':.4: __ .~~ __ "'''_6 -I' _ Sponsored by Student Center • Opinions&Editoriols -9 The Ranger News February 18, 2005 100 WORDS OR LESS Parkside is a peaceful campus. but there are some people that are spreading hate. On New Year's Eve r started getting harassing phone calls -- In these phone calls, my life was threatened, racial slurs were made and so on. It was brought to my attention who it was. This student was actually written up for having a confederate flag in his dorm room. If this happened to you, speak up so there are no more incidents like this. --Jose Sanchez All U'W-Parkside community members are encouraged to send 100 words or less to rangernews@uwp.edu. ADVICE COLUMN This is Tori Schuebel's advice. If you disagree, write 100 words or less. Dear Tori, I am in desperate need of some math help. My teacher has been no help, and J heard of the Tutoring Center on campus, but I don't know how it works or if it could actually help. -Stumped Dear Stumped, Tutoring is a great idea if you are not getting the necessary help from a teacher. There are at least two awesome math tutors there who are students majoring in math at UW-Parkside; they both have taken advanced calculus 350 last semester. You don't need an appointment, you can just walk in and ask for help. The tutor center is down in Wyllie Hall, near the cashier's office. and is open Monday and Tuesday from 9 a.m. until 6 p.m., Wednesday and Thursday from 9 a.m. until 7 p.m., and Friday 9 a.m. until noon. If for some reason you still can't understand the material try asking another math teacher or another student in the class, if you hadn't already. It may seem obvious but not enough students take advantage of the tutor center, and it can help a ton! -Good Luck! Tori Dear Tori. Iam on diet pills ... Green Tea supplements to be exact. Some people tell me they are unhealthy, others say it's about time!!! ljust want to lose the weight before summer and feel better about myself. I've tried other ways and resorted to diet pi lis. Please shoot me Some advice. -Ms. Unconfident Dear Ms. Unconfident, First Iwill explain the basics in a situation like this, although Iam sure you may have heard them before. You should always check in with a doctor to see what they say first, but it's always good to get a second opinion. Perhaps you can check out some additional information on the internet at websites such as http://greentealovers. corn!. While I'm sure that taking these supplements cannot hurt you, I don't know how reliable they are on weight loss. Every bottle has a tag line saying "Supplement to be taken in conjunction with a healthy diet and regular exercise program. Results may vary". Green Tea is very good for your health in general so if you are not paying too much Isay it is fine to be on the pills. Remember the simple facts, though, that you should also be aware of your food diet and exercise. Iknow it is never easy but if you keep using merely diet pills you'll never effectively lose the weight. Small changes can be made, and yes it will take some time. Trust me small steps are going to be the most effective in the long run increasing your body confidence and health; J speak from experience, and research; as one website states, " Most health professionals recommend slow weight loss as the safest and most effective approach. A sensible weightloss program allows you to lose weight gradually -- about one-half to one pound per week. Gradual weight loss promotes long-term loss of body fat, not just water weight that can be quickly regained. If you need ideas of what kind of small changes can be made you can log onto htlp:llwww.smallstep.gov/step_2/ step2_choices.html, or look in health magazines, which you don't even have to buy, at Barnes and Nobles. If you decrease 500 calories a day (weather is be by cutting food calories or exercising more), you'll start losing a pound a week.. For more information log onto http://www.caloriecontrol.org/. Keep strong and you'll be able to accomplish this! -Have Confidence, Tori Would you support an MTV Campus Invasion? "No. I don't like MTY. J don't think they are about music anymore." Blake Holland Freshman 19 Undecided Major "J don't know. r would check them out if they came." Matt Koch Junior 21 Geology Major "Sure. It would put our campus on the map." Cristina Dam Senior 20 Psychology Major i:iiiiif'If~!ll"Sure, why not. But r would also like to see more support toward the music of the bands that are on campus." Bony Benavides Junior 23 Music Major "Yeah. It would be fun, and it's not much fun on this campus." Tasha Woods Senior 23 Business Management Major Ronny's Special Adventures By Pete KIugiewicz ~(fJDlJ ~ 1JI~l&$ ~~}7 UW-ParksideSports ~10~ ~T~h~e~R~a~n~g~e~r~N~e~w~s~------ Fe_br_u...:a::..;ry:.....::18::.~2~00! I Ski School BY NICK BORNS Staying in shape this winter doesn't necessarily have to include locking yourself in a "muscle jail" and grunting away while moving stacks of metal plates in mind-numbing repetition. The snowfall this winter means an invigorating and refreshing outdoor activity for everyone---cross country skiing. There are many skiing enthusiast who eagerly wait for ample snowfall, so they can strap sticks to their boots and slide through the cross country trails at UW-Parkside. They don't just get out there on the snow and instantaneously shoot across the field. Cross country skiing requires knowledge, skill, and a few pieces of basic equipment to get started. The equipment necessary for skiing is simple: a pair of skis, a pair of ski boots, a pair of poles, and, finally warm outer garments. The skis are not straight planks of highly-polished wood. They have a curve, "camber," which is a built-in flex that cross country skis have to provide maximum performance during the push and glide phases. Also, the bottom of them differs from downhill or telemark skis, as the cross country skis now almost all have small ridge patterns on the middle portion to provide grip during the pushing motion. The equipment is available at most sporting goods stores, but there are a few important notes concerning clothing. Remember the acronym COLD. Keep Clean-fancy jackets & fleeces won't work properly if dirty (skin always secretes oils). Avoid Overheating-adjust the level of activity to ensure that sweating is kept to minimum, Wear Layers-heat gets trapped between layers to aid in staying warm, Don't Overdress-remaining "comfortably cool" will keep you skiing longer. Before any of that stuff comes into play, you need trails to ski on. Having the trails is essential, but using them first can be an intimidating experience. The first skiers of a new snowfall often must "break trail," stomp on the snow with their skis to create a cross country "track" to ski on. Breaking trail is fun because there are usually fewer skiers on the trails, but it is also very demanding because skiers don't get the benefit of sliding forward. Packed trails allow for a tremendous increase in glide and range of motion while eliminating mucb of the variability in conditions found at nongroomed locations like UW-Parkside. If your fitness background includes activities such as ice skating, downhill or telemark skiing, then you will have a far greater likelihood of early success. Ifthese sports are rare and mysterious rituals that you've only viewed from TV or afar, then taking a professional lesson your first few times on decent snow will guarantee enjoyable first experiences. The "classic technique" motion is the easiest to learn in a short time span and requires the least amount of athletic conditioning to enjoy-at least at the novice level. Utilizing an opposite driving leg and forward poling arm, cross country skiers look as if they are simply sliding forward. Now, try to remember the time you and aU your siblings lined up on a newly-waxed hardwood floor for a sock race. You would scoot-n-slide across the floor using a driving motion with one leg as your opposite arm swings forward for momentum and balance. This "scoot-n-slide" is the essence of the cross country skiing. Start on a flat area with finn tracks. Assume a basic athletic stance by keeping your knees slightly bent while leaning forward a little. Start out with small slides at first, and as you progress to longer and more integrated motions, your slides and strides will become longer and longer. After even as little as a few minutes gliding you should notice that if you get your weight up and over the forward ski (as opposed to sitting back just a wee bit), the ski will glide forward with quite a bit of freedom and POwer. Most beginners get a taste of a real gliding ski even in the firstfive minutes on snow. You'll need to use your poles to help propel you forward and maintain your balance. Using the opposite leg-opposite arm technique will do the job. If you think about the motion too much, you'll probable fall over, so just move naturally. When planting your poles try to keep your arms at shoulder-width spacing and the pole angled down towards your boots. When planting, you should slightly flex your elbow, then should push your hand smoothly past your hips and extend fully behind you as if you were trying to throw the pole. Keep a hold of the pole though! Ultimately you'll achieve a pace and form that is a pendulum-like motion with a relaxed follow-through and recovery. Once you reach this point, you will start to look around at the beautiful winter scenery that snowhares, squirrels, and redtailed hawks live in. Eventually UW-Parkside's trails will be too steep for skiing and you'll need to switch to the herringbone. Derived from the Norwegian love offish, the herringbone is primarily an uphill walking technique. To herringbone, skiers simply widen the tips of their skis into an open 'Y' and put one ski in front of the other-kind of like walking. Skiers who came intoIh uphill in tracks exercise courtesy by stepping out of the tracks and moving to oneside or the other before they herringbone-it can really ruin the tracks that took someone" diligent effort to make. As the grade increases or the snow becomes firmer, skiersmust use the entire inside edge of your ski as a claw to add grip. On firm snow this willmean really planting the inside edge pretty hard each time you take a step. Anything on the UW-Parkside's trails can be overcome with the herringbone technique. Herringbone-ia can take a lot of energy if you do it too fast, so climb at a moderate pace. The good aspect of moving up is usually the return trip: skiing downhill. Skiing downhill is by far the most enjoyable part of cross country skiing (apart from keeping in shape and looking at the winter wonderland). Skiers trying this bit for the first time can often be identified by their white powdery snow-coat from the fall they recently took. However, if they weren't falling, it means that they weren't trying. To increase your success, bend your anldes and knees, keep your weight on the balls of your feet (this gives you a "shock absorber" for undulations in the snow), keep your hands in front of you and your poles out of the snow, remain calm (a relaxed body and mind reacts better to changes in speed and terrain), and, finally, learn how to weight and un-weight your skis to control your decent. As with all of life's obstacles, you should start on a small, private hill that's free of obstacles and observers (no one needs to know whether or not you took a little spill). The most important thing to remember is that you should be having fun. If you find that the cold wind is biting your little nosey-wosey, and you just cao't keep your httle paws warm, then you should consider the treadmill or the indoor track. However, if you find that you have a new love for the outdoors, remember to bring a camera and take pictures, for Punxsutawney Phi] says that winter will only last six more weeks. SPORTS STANDINGS GLye Men's Basketball Team Standings GLye Women's Basketball Team Standings as of February 14, 2005 as of February 14, 2005 GLVC Overall GLVC Overall WIn Lon Pet. Win Los!; Pet. Win Loss Pet. S. Indiana 14 2 .875 19 4 .826 SltfEdWa~ 1~ .750 QUincy 13 3 .696 16 7 .696 4 19 6 .760 UW.parkslde Indianapolis 12 12 5 ,706 18 9 .667 4 .750 17 6 .739 11 688 Bellarmine 11 5 .688 17 6 .739 5 15 8 .65~ Saint Joseph's 10 7 .588 N. Kentucky 11 5 .688 14 9 .609 14 9 .609 9 8 .529 Lewis 11 5 .688 14 9 .609 14 9 .609 N. Kentucky 6 10 .375 10 Indianapolis 10 6 .687 17 6 .773 12 .455 Lewl$ 4 12 .~50 SIU-Edwardsville 6 10 .275 11 14 .440 9 14 .391 Bellarmine 4 12 .250 9 14 Kentucky Wesleyan 6 11 .353 11 13 .458 .391 Missouri-51. Louis 4 13 .235 ., 16 Southern Indiana 5 11 .313 12 11 .522 .304 UW-Parkside 4 13 .235 7 17 Missouri-SI. Louis 3 14 .176 4 20 .167 .292 Saint Joseph's 2 15 .118 5 18 .217 11__ ~Aits&(uIture TheRanger News ------------=F-e-b-ru-a-ry-l--,S-,-2-0-0-S How To (Review a Pop Album In Six Days) BY NICK HONECK "I'Il try and make it/All on my own:' is a line from the song Nobody's valentine. on Nate Johnson's How To (Make A Pap Record ill Tell Days). For the most part, he does. The album's title may be misleading but "it just kind of came to me," said Johnson. Acknowledging the concept of the album. Johnson began with the intention of writing one song a day for 10 days. However. the project stretched to 14 tracks. More confusing is that Johnson lumps his album into the pop category. The listener cannottell if this is a sly wink to the underground. or ifhe truly wanted to make a pop album. How To is an all-acoustic album about breaking up and making up - a subject that goes band in hand with today's higb school and college students. "So what call I do girl? fro be with you girllWhy can't you see the pain/You put me through again? NOll didn't even know my name," a line from YOli'II Never Be Mine, could comfortably lit on almost any other song on the album. Johnson says. "half of those songs sound like they're about a girl. but it's just a girl." He didn ·~.write PAOSocial as ccess BY NICHOLAS MICHAEL RAYNlKAR On February 3 the Parks ide Asian Organization (PAO) hosted a social in The Den from 7 to 10 p.m. Attendees were greeted by free popcorn. pizza, pool and bowling, as well as a nice selection of hip hop and trance music. PAO President Thavone Munesy, 11 junior, was enthusiastic about the turnout for the event, hoping that students from a cross-section of ethnic backgrounds wi II be attracted to the organization. Although the majority of PAO"s members are Hrnong, Munesy stressed that students do not need to have Hmong heritage to be a member, nor must they be Asian. "We're really trying to gear events for the whole school:' Munesv said. "Even though we're called the· Parkside Asian Organization, we do have members from all other races." PAO member Bou Yang agreed: "We"re not just focusing our events toward a specific group. We invite everyone to come. No one should be worried about sticking out," she said. «Everyone can recognize that nobody wants to feel alienated," Yang said. "So, to have a really successful event, [an organization] should try to come from a place that focuses on their culture an values, while at the them about anyone specifically, Yet, Johnson's songwriting talent is apparent on How To. Some of the best songs 011 the album, Beautifut Girl, Nobodys valentine. and I'm Feeling Fine. only slightly vary from the basic songwriting formula used on the record. Johnson's strengtb lies in his ability to write lyrics that may. on paper, look overwrought but when spoken sound nothing but sincere. Thankfully, though Johnson overuses some worn alit cliches such as "please don't let me down:' the album is still very easy to listen to and versatile. It could blend into the background at a party or be listened to while dealing with the latest relationship situation. and, as Johnson says, "it's only nine bucks." Johnson, who plans to record How To (Make A Pop Record in Tell Days) with a band, shows a lot of promise as a singer and songwriter on the album. "Goodbye/see you next time/I hope we meet again." Johnson sings on Goodbye. the album's finale. It would be nice to hear from Johnson again. When we do, hopefully he will use his talent on a wider variety of subject matter than he did on this promising debut album. Nate Johnson currently has no concerts scheduled. The album is the first release by local label Two Cities Media. For 1110re information on Nate Johnson and Two Cities Media. go to Two Cities Media at www.twociticsmedia.com. The album is for sale at Amazon.corn. same time building the community of the university." Munesy, in her first year as president of the organization. along with other PAG executive board members. are planning two large events over the course of this semester. PAD will host ~1I1Asian open house in March. Workshops will be held during the day, while a comedian will entertain students during the evening. Then in April PAO will be celebrating Asian Awareness Month by hosting a read-in similar to the one held by the Black Student Union and the Office of Multicultural Student Affairs on February 1. Everyone from the community is invited to arrend and read a brief excerpt of and Asian or Asian American writer's work. PAD meets on Wednesdays at noon. 12 February 18,20( The Ranger News Foreign Film Focus I Love It, I Love It Not BY NICK BORNS Wisconsin flower shops will be busy with orders even past Valentine's Day, but it's unlikely there will be an order for one rose to be sent to the workplace of a secret love. Viewers of He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not (or A la folie ... pas du tout for the Francophiles) will notice there are roses of all colors: April fool's pastels; friendly, cheek-blushing pinks and, of course, bright, beaming I-love-you reds. Picking her way through this flower shop, Angelique, played by Amelie star Audrey Tautou, is seen daintily discriminating for the perfect rose for her beau. Roses, hearts, and pretty girls on bicycles make the audience think of nothing but L'amoure. Taking these images in and teased by these introductory symbols, moviegoers might imagine they were about to see a lightweight, romantic comedy in the usual style of French film. The truth, however, is darker and, in many ways, more entertaining. He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not is set in the summery city of Bordeaux, which looks like the old-time black-and-white film Paris. The tale develops in front of the audience as a romantic film-cum-rnelodrarna. It begins with the end of an extramarital affair between a cardiologist, Laic, who is played by Samuel Le Bihan, and a female art student on scholarship, Angelique. The impressionable young girl then tries to get Loic to leave his pregnant wife, Rachel. David, played by Jeff Bigot, is a medical intern doting on Angelique, He pines away and becomes increasingly frustrated watching her flirt with Laic. Heloise, played by Sophie Guillermin, works in the same cafe as Angelique and witnesses Loic's mistreatment of her friend. Both characters are caring and dislike Loic's cold-hearted rejection of Angelique. He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not traverses a continually darkening path more twisted than a truckload of French bread. Its biggest surprises are saved for the final half, taking a number of risks that all payoff. Told from two distinct and opposing points of view, it gives the opportunity to see the plot unfold from each of the main characters' perspectives. Director Laetitia Colombani does not argue for subjective truth. Colombani gives the first section of the film a quick pace in order to give the audience just enough clues to know that something is wrong with one perspective, without entirely revealing the catch. In fact, a key aspect of this motion picture is that one point-of-view is more reliable than the other. If you have seen the movie, you prohably don't have any doubts about who represents the more credible narrator. Every event has a plausible explanation that precludes the audience from engaging their willing suspension of disbelief. The finest touch comes with the soundtrack. Nat King Cole's version of the jazz classic "LOVE," creates a playfully distressing point in contrast to the two perspectives. The way Colombani ties everything together will satisfy the most fastidious audience members. The plot is more puzzling than suspenseful. With a second or third viewing, audiences will better understand what's going on and can pay attention to the details of the cast's craftsmanship. In the end, there are no difficulties reconciling the outward discrepancies between Angelique's and Laic's perspectives. It seems that the part was perfectly made for Tautou. The audience's association with her previous casting as the title character in Amelie shakes the assumptions made during the first half of the film. And yet, it is that vety association with her previous role that allows Tautou to toy with audience's expectations. In fact, this role requires a farther-reaching range than Tautou's lead in Amelie, and the actress has no d.ifficulty overcoming the challenge. Le Bihan. who, like Tautou, is required to play two radically different versions of the sanae character, plays Loic as if the part was written for him. Bihan was featured in the movie Le Pacte des Loups (The Brotherhood oj the Wolf for the monoglots) in which he played a martial arts expert recently returned from New France to fight an old, French terror. Making films with credible and unpredictable plots is no easy task, but when filmmakers add highly talented actors to great writing, the result is a surprising and devious movie where one person's viewpoint represents only half of the story. Next in VW-Parkside's Foreign Film Series is Whale Rider, a film about a New Zealander girl, Pai, who ventures to break the oppressive rules of primogeniture. Her father leaves New Zealand, and Pai is raised by her grandparents, Koro, the chief of his people, and Nanny, his wife. Pai believes she could serve as the chief, but her grandfather, despite his love, opposes this idea. One day, all the village's teenage boys are summoned to compulsory lessons on how to be a Maori and the leader of Maoris. Pai, who is banned from the classes, eavesdrops and enlists a wayward uncle to reveal some of the males' secrets. Whale Rider is in English and Maori with subtitles. Happy viewing, Communication majors! POETRY Promise BY TYRAN SAFFOLD JR. " "I'ma he there for you, I will never leave you And I meant what I said No matter what Even if I'm dead . ] won't allow myself to go to Heaven until my Spirit secures you during every step of your life Vntil the time God allows us to re-urute Yes... r said I will post phone Heaven To allow my spirit to be with you I will not allow my seed 2 go through The pain of not havin a father around There will be no need for courts or prenupts Cuzyo mom .. . The one I marry- we will be together until our earthly bodies expire And even then our spirits will walk hand in hand in the after life But I promise No divorces My child I will out run horses hefore I leave you You will never have to say"] need you" Because I'ma already know I'ma already know that a child cannot be complete without its Father "Baby, I will never leave you" And I put so much emotion in them words that tears fall A vow to my baby etched in stone like the Ten Commandments Sealed with a kiss to mama's stomach Your heart will pump my blood and it was Gods will 4 you 2 exist And its God's will for me to exist in yo life .. I'ma make A bond sealed with love and coated with a promise That I will he there to help you take on any problems Like a protector .... A father A friend .... A father An advisor. ... A father A man .... A father You will never have to cry about me not bein around Cuz I will always be there Like roaches in the projects Like the words of God Like hate in America I will always be there I will always be there I promise .... I will always be there Fitting In BY ANDY HENDRICKS I never fit in, they always laughed at me I tried to be social. .. r tried to be cool. .. I tried to he polite . I tried to be funny . I tried to be like them ... ... and they laughed together ... and they laughed warmly ... and they laughed cruelly .and they laughed by not laughing ... and they laughed at me Itried to be different. ] tried to be a fake. I tried to be bad ... I tried to be a man. I tried ... ... and they laughed all the same ... and they laughed genuinely . .. and they laughed good . .. and they laughed childishly ... and they laughed effortlessly Finally, I tried not trying. ... and the laughing stopped. A Nasty Habit BY ANDY HENDRICKS When you bum it, it destroys, Destroys you with joys, Destroys all takers, Destroys the fire makers. With their horrible taste, Your lungs are a waste, You cough them to pieces, And breathe in wheezes. Burning with the smoke of death, A carcinogenic breath, An addiction so serious, It kills all--casual or curious. Even if they make you cool, You're really just a fool, Because When cancer comes for you, There's nothing you can do. febWOry 18, 2005 --- The Ranger News 13 The Exonerated Releases Laughs and Cries ByNICKBORNS The death penalty is nothing but revenge, and the United States justice system is too flawed to carry out y actionwithout reasonable doubt. Of course, readers anaynot think this way. However, the authors of 711e ;ollerared have an opinion something akin to these opening statements. The Exonerated, written by Jessica Blank and ErikJensen, is based on their interviews with more than40 exonerated death-row inmates from vastly differentethnic, religious, educational. and geographic backgrounds. Although 89 inmates had been exonerated by the timeBlank and Jensen began the interviewing process, theyare the exception from the rule. Many people on deathrow are waiting for appeals courts to review and re-try their cases. Fortunately for the guilty, the wheels ofjustice tum slowly, but unfortunately for the innocent, theslow pace compounds the injustices inherent in the system. Of its many accolades, The Exonerated received the Defenderof Justice Award from the National Association ofCriminalDefense Lawyers, Court TV's Scales of JusticeAward, and the Justice in Media and Arts Award fromDeath Penalty Focus. The play's idea sprang from" ... a conference on the deathpenalty at Columbia University." Blank and Jensen "tookthe idea to producer Allan Buchman, a friend of [theirs]from the downtown theater community in New Yorkwho ran the Culture Project." The development of the dialogue was done by a group"of talented and underemployed friends" that Blankand Jensen worked with to form a script from the hundredsof hours of interview recordings. "Additionally, [they] dug into the court transcripts and case files of the people whose stories weweretelling. [They] spent countless hours in dusty courthouse record rooms, pawing through thousands of microfiche files and cardboard boxes full of affidavits, depositions, police interrogations and courtroom testimony." The writing team certainly did their research to form a relevant and poignant work that doesn't just get audiences started thinking about the justice system, but shapes their thoughts about h. Additionally, the moratorium on the death penalty declared by Governor George Ryan of Illinois gave the play further impetus, as the subject's popularity moved into the mainstream news media. The advocates of the death penalty have another George in the then-Governor George Bush, a presidential candidate in 2000 when the play was being performed across the country. Bush saw "more executions carried out under his watch as governor of Texas than any other state since the reinstatement of the death penalty in 1976." The authors of The Exonerated feel very particular about the casting and delivery of their work. In the production notes that accompany the script, they state "[d]irectors and actors should be careful not to be didactic in their presentation of the play. The drama of these stories does not need enhancement: It's generally a good idea to avoid stapling newspaper headlines to the back wall or throwing electric chairs allover the stage." This advice seems sound and theatrically feasible when readers consider the efficacy of the text. However, Blank and Jensen are strict in the ethnic casting of their characters because they believe "it is strongly important that black people play black people and white people play white people. [They] strongly support nontraditional casting in general[,] but in the case of this play it dilutes the reality of many of the issues involved." Diluting the issues or not, the UW-Parkside production group portrayed many of the characters with "mostly young Caucasian women" according to Michael Clickner, a theater arts professor and director. The nontraditional casting didn't seem to bother him or anyone else on the production team, for he added that he "also had a sense that the problems highlighted in this show are everyone's problems. As Ayesu, one of the actors said: 'It is a person's soul not his skin that makes them who they are. '" Putting nontraditional casting aside, student actors can acquire a lot of experience by expanding the range of roles they can play, and the FreshlNK productions are a way they can do it. Clickner says, "the skill level vanes within the student population; this [series] is a way to train young people." And will the young people train. The FreshINK series is going to be a set of new authors and student actors, and directors with at least one semester of directing classes under his or her belt. The student production team will present its proposal to a board of theater department faculty who will decide whether or not the show will go on. The challenge to the students is the same challenge that faces professionals in the entertainment industry: they have to find a cast, make the sets, design and make the costumes, pick timely and engaging topics, and rehearse, rehearse, rehearse. Don't worry. UW-Parkside students can help by purchasing tickets at the theater, making donations at upcoming events, trying out for a part, or submitting a script like all the other writers. The schedule for the FreshINK series is yet to be determined. The only event set in stone is the FreshINK Productions FRESHink New Play Festival, which features a collection of new, short plays written by UW-Parkside student playwrights that will be as diverse and eclectic as the writers who crafted them. A complete list of titles, writers, and directors will be announced at each performance. The performances will be held at the Augie Wegner Studio Theatre on May 8 at 2 p.m. and 7:30 p.m. tr Winterfest Entertains Some, Disrupts Others BY NICHOLAS MICHAEL RAVNlKAR Many students noticed the commotion in Wyllie Hall's Main Place on February 9. However, most weren't sure exactly why they saw sumo wrestler COstumes, laser tag mazes, an oxygen bar and two giant green screens. . .. Dubbed Winterfest the event was sponsored by the Student Activities Office andcostapproximately $4,5'00, according to Stephanie Sirovatka-Marshall, assistant directorof Student Activities. ''Winterfest evolved from the former Winter Carnival that used to take place inFebruaryand was coordinated by a handful of student organizations," SirovatkaMarshallsaid. "Part of the mission of the Student Activities Office [is] to provide both entertainmentand educational programs for students, along with leadership opportunities,and support for student organizations," she went on. Students had mixed reactions. From 11 a.m, to 3 p.m., many students flocked to the ox.ygenbar, where they could "relax" for five minutes under the influence of flavored OXygenand flashing lights. . . Others were quick to get into the act with one of the two gr~en~screen e~hlblts, Where they could either make their own music video or have their picture cancatured by FreakyFotos Some, The Ranger News staff among them. even donned sumo suits and attempted toknock One another to the mat. ..' ki d f tiff ['d fight Katie Barrier, a senior, commented, "If they didn t have this In a S l , ~itB . ., " . ut since they do 1 won', parncrpate- di b' lace O ' b I ted in a less jstur 109 P . thers thought that the event could have een oca ." d id "I hi . the Union one stu ent sal . , don't understand why they don't have t us over 10 . ' I d th Th ' dlv : thing CtOJl1O' on over mere, an e at would make more sense But there s hal' y any ~ e> 0 h f t Un' . . . I cr . Main Place gets t e most 00 JOn IS so separated from the rest of the school. ouess traffic., Th . b th entertaining and disruptive. e music that accompanied the event was o. d -ecords and preferred to "It was horrible!" commented Erika, who works III sru ent I withhold her last name. Many students regularly study in Lower Main Place's Wyllie Market, as well as in the comfortable couches near the Tutoring Center. However, they found it difficult to concentrate. "It was kind of loud. It distracted me, but Iguess if Iwanted to focus Icould have gone to the library," said Jolie Johnson. senior. "I needed to eat lunch though." Sarah Myers. a writing consultant in the tutoring center, didn't find the volume disruptive. "It wasn't too bad in the tutoring center," she said. "But when Iwalked past it was annoying.l think it just depends on the song." "The various events were chosen either by what we know students like, by asking students what they might like, and trying something new," Sirovatka-Marshall said. "The 02 Bar is becoming popular on campuses across the country:' "All of the associates and agencies had been here before over the years for other events." Sirovatka-Marshall said. In fact. one company's representative is actually an alumnus of UW-Parkside. Stephanie Witkiewicz. a graduate of UW-Parkside. currently works for Clowning Around. which provided the laser tag maze and sumo wrestling. Witkiewicz mentioned that there was more student participation around the noon hour. with over 40 college students chasing one another through the inflatable maze with plastic laser guns throughout the afternoon. She said. "'I think everybody was able to have a good time." port Written & Created by the Satirical Writers Guild VOLUME 3 ISSUE 01 The State Makes Triumphant Return Kenosha, WI - In 2004, The State announced "Despite unbelievably low prices. Wal-Mart Still Sucks." Fewer words could have ever been truer, and still hold true today in the year of 2005. Thus the world was introduced to the wit and wisdom of that Nobel Award paper that we all came to cherish -The State. But in November, charges of treason and insurrection were levied against The State by the Attorney General of Guam, John Ashcroft. After an unsuccessful campaign of poster boards and hallway boycotting, The State was ultimately exiled to the Isle of Mariana. Recently. the resignation of the Attorney General of Guam has once again brought the public eye back to this courageous paper. Public demand led to an attempt to free The State from its prison. Now. after a daring rescue by Navy Seals and Green Berets, and more than ten weeks in exile, The State triumphantly returns home. "The State Has Returned!" proclaimed The State as it stepped off the plane and addressed the teeming crowd that gathered at Mitchell lnternational Airport. In the ensuing champagne party, we were granted an exclusive interview with The State, where we were blessed with this message; "The State apologizes for its absence from The Ranger News and your livest. But know that the past ten weeks were not in vain! From the seeds of The State's imprisonment blossomed inspiration the world has never seen nor will ever see again! The State preserved it all in its mind. waiting for the day when its freedom was restored. Now, with The State's return, the public will eat of its fruits once again!" Public support for The State is at an alltime high, and The State's opinions will seriously influence the future course of events in Parkside and nearby regions. Chris Sernenas and other politicians are reponed to be anticipating The State's. every publication, no doubt hoping that a kind word will propel them to a future term, or nervously dreading if The State will criticize assholes like them. When The State was asked where the focus of its next publication will be, The Stale replied Children at a Florida elementary school break into a spontaneous song and dance number upon hearing of The State:\, refilm. "The emotional revitalization of Parkside is where my main thrust will lie. A new semester is upon us! Class organization and rampant intellectualism needs to be curbed! The need for this muse has never been greater!" WiJ) The State live up to its boasts? Can The State really revitalize Parkside and its laggard newspaper? Detractors and Terrorists alike have reportedly scoffed at such claims, calling them 'exaggerated', but given the State's prior accomplishments, we believe The State will succeed. "The Stare does no! apologi:e. Artist Admits She is a Fraud Chicago, lL - In a press conference earlier this week rising contemporary artist Isabel Pintora, admitted that the majority of her work was done by nonsensical guessing and just "slopping gobs of whatever color was near" admits Pintora. Pintora was scheduled to have an exhibition of her paintings in the Chicago Art Museum, and was slatted to embark on lecturing at local universities. All of this came to a halt Tuesday as 32-year old Pintora addressed the press and her small artist following. She said, "I used to consider myself a neoexpressionist painter with a De Stijl flare, but that is Parkside Begins New Semester, Death Lottery Kenosha. WI - January has seen the birth of a new Spring semester at UW Parkside. Each Spring semester leaves its own signature on the history of the Wisconsin university, and this year will be no different. The boldest change this semester, the weekly death lottery, has piqued the interest of students and faculty alike. "1 think it would be a really nice way of reducing congestion in the hallways," says science professor Luke Tuttle. "Sure, it's only one person a week, but every little bit helps." The death lottery will work based off of another new set of ID numbers. as the administration felt there were not enough ID numbers in use already. A computer program will randomly generate ID numbers each week. Mode of execution will be chosen by the winner, but the administration has promised to set some general boundaries. Students seem to be largely open to the idea. "It seems like there's some real potential for mishaps, but it could be kind of exciting," says senior Andrew Twerm. "It'll be like reality TV right on our own campus -- 'who'll get picked next"" "Will they rry to run like On Logan's Run?" adds friend Jimmy Read. "Can you imagine a death squad chas.ing after people who tried to ditch out on their execution? I think we'd all cheer the death squad on. That's one great thing about Parkside; we're all about fairness. Listen, if your number gets picked, don't be a sore loser. Take the death squad like a mann just crap. Crap. Crap. Crap. For example my paintings 'Cosmic Tuna' and 'Journey to the Center of My Lonely Vagina' are just triangles and circles haphazardly placed upon a canvas. And the sculpture I did entitled 'Tortured Starlight' I pretty much made that with glitter and a rusty street sign." As to why she came clean with this sudden confession amidst the newfound rising fame, Pintora said "I felt an enormous amount of guilt and 1 felt that I needed to cleanse my spiritual canvas so that I might start anew on artistic endeavors. Plus you can only get away with painting triaugles for so long and still be considered a serious artist." Spellchequer Broken Study Shows The State Is Smarter Than You Donald Trump Fires God, God Gets Last Laugh Buddhist Wants To Not Want Ninjas Invade Ranger Office, Screw Up Layout " , ......... , ." ,.- THE STATE StraightMan Admits Attraction to Brad Pitt Racine, WI - Leonard Dupri, a resident of Raine, admitted yesterday that he would "take it cn the ass from Brad Pitt." Dupri, a 27 year old ~uUfiUmentspecialist for Morton Systems, Inc. made this admission while out drinking with several friends. The five of them had been at theAngry Troll Pub for three hours, drinking anddiscussing the merits of various local and national sports teams when the conversation [umedto their favorite films. David Jefferson, one of the five, claims Randy Wilcox was the one who switched gears, "He said he loved Rudy, then everyone just started talking about movies." Atpress time, Wilcox was still unavailable for commenl. In a brief phone interview, Dupri declined to confirm his admission, saying only thathe'd had eight beers and was "totally plastered" Jefferson claims Dupri had only had five,saying, "I should know, it was my night 10 pick up the tab." Plumber Knows It Was Porn That Clogged The Toilet .CORRCcnOllS WilmOI, WI - The apartment of Isaac Fredericksen, a residentofWilmOl in Kenosha County, was paid a visit by a local plumber Tuesday after the toilet overflowed, soaking the carpet all the way to the couch. The call was placed between 7 and 7:30 PM to PJ WaterWorks Plumbing, and a representative was sent immediately. Fredericksen reportedly answered the door nervously, shuffled the plumber into the bathroom hastily and seemed overall anxious for him to fix the problem and leave. After several vain attempts to flush the toilet, a drain snake was used and a pulpy mass was extracted. The fixture immediately flushed. "He had me throw the thing away real quick so I couldn't see what it was," reports Bud Dower, the plumber who performed the extraction. "But I've done enough house calls to know that weren't no wad ofTP.lain'tone to judge, so I don't ever say anything, but I always know." Fredericksen, visibly relieved, thanked Dower and pushed him out the door after over-paying him by five dollars. The sound of a dehumidifier could then be heard through the wall. LETTER TO THE EDITOR Dear Editors of The State, To Whom ItMay Concern, In reference to the state's volume 2 issue 4; r don't think you dumb asses know what's really real. Your feeble attempt to correctthe misspelling of the word defecate made me laugh. The word shit is derived from the acronym Stow Hi In Tight. When shipping manure on ships the stuff had to be Stored High In Tight to avoid getting wet and stinking to high heaven. This tenn has nothing to do with defecate. It does however, directly reJate to bovine defecations. Sincerely, Richard Hertz Well, my dear sir, it seems you have made a small error. As a true seafaring man would know, the acronym was actually S.H.A.T. for Stow High And Tight. Also, it had nothing to do with mannre. This acronym was most commonly found on boxes containing Ukranlan kumquats, as they were rare and considered extremely precious in the days of sailing vessels. When one considers the treacherous route any sailingship wonld have to travel to reach the Ukraine, the value of this commodity is clear. In addition, the weather in the Ukraine was infamously harsh on the kumquat harvest, causing each year's yield to be depressingly small. The few farmers who bred this crop were often found dead from suicide. This led to a snperstition in the region that the kumquats themselves led to the death of the farmers. Itis from this superstition that we receive the saying "Fate of the Ukranian Kumquat Dead," now often abbreviated to "FUCKED." Sincerely, The State CROSSFIRE COUNTERPOINT I I like having to pay more money so I can return the video a few days late. You are a retard. By Harrison Peterson Film Critic By Malcolm Underwood Roundy's Night Manager, Beautician IHave you been to Blockbuster lately? What a trendy new scheme they have Igoing! As I'm sure you know. figuring out a fair, unbiased late payment scheme that makes one money is tough. Should it be based on how much the original rental was for, based on the amount of days late, or just one flat fee? And calll'ng to remind people to bring back the only copy of Rocky XXXIV - What a nightmare! But Blockbuster bas solved all these dilemmas with its new campaign: 'The End of Late Fees, The Start of More'. Think about it! They've been trying oh so hard for so long to make up for the loss of money from late fees. Remember that whole' more choices' thing last year? That obviously didn't work. But they finally Hit upon the solution. Eliminating late fees altogether, and replacing it with more! Blockbuster's new Policy is bloody fantastic! It doesn't matter that it's costing me more money to rent a video for seven days when I only need three hours - I'm getting more!" La bomba kinda Video chupa. Ellos've obtuvo, quiere, el material y la manera dernasiado a la moda demasiado de eUo pero entonces ellos nunca tienen los videos frescos que usted acaba por tener que ir al Video de la Familia para. Otorgado, ellos tuvieron cada episodic de la FireFly por Joss Whedon que era la manera refresca. ~Pero que's el punto de tener un mill6n de copias de la ultima pelfcula mala de Jaula de Nicholas? Y su seccion del juego es la misma man era. Cincuenra copias de Conker's dfa Malo de Piel pero no una sola copia de Estrella Oceano. La Bomba de Jesucristo me mea Iejos, Vaya al Video de la Familia. Ellos've obtuvo a chicas mas monas all f! �1~6=================_~T~he~R~a~n~g~e~r~N~e~w~s~------ F_e_b_r_u_a...;ry'--18::.:..:.~ i CLASSIFIED ADS (262) 595-2287 uwp_ads@yahoo.com Classified Ad Rates 30 words for $5.00 and 25¢ for.every additional word. For Rent Basement room with all amenities. Not fancy, but gives you your own space. Private entrance. 75: weekly. 6 miles from school, southside Racine. NO SMOKERS! Pets OK. Call: 637-2023 or 909-2246 Leave Message For Sale Apple G4 powermac Ighz, I gig ram, superdrive, zip disc, OSX, and 60 gig hd. Make offer. Call: 537-2103 Events The Revolution, an informal discussion & action group, will be meeting on Saturdays at 2 p.m., in Middle Main Place. 1 " r I' Several students try the oxygen bar featured at Winter Fest in Middle Main Place on Febraury 9. Alsosetup for Winter Fest was a sumo wresfllng mat along with costumes. a laser tag tent, a caricature sketch artist, and an area for students to make their own music videos. I ........ ~... ~~. ··.tt _ . Dublin Core The Dublin Core metadata element set is common to all Omeka records, including items, files, and collections. For more information see, http://dublincore.org/documents/dces/. Title A name given to the resource The Ranger News, Volume 35, issue 11, February 18, 2005 Description An account of the resource Student newspaper of the University of Wisconsin-Parkside, Kenosha, Wis. Date A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource 2/18/2005 Subject The topic of the resource College student newspapers and periodicals Student publications University of Wisconsin-Parkside--Newspapers Format The file format, physical medium, or dimensions of the resource Newspaper Language A language of the resource English Coverage The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant Kenosha, Wisconsin Type The nature or genre of the resource Text Publisher An entity responsible for making the resource available University of Wisconsin-Parkside Rights Information about rights held in and over the resource The Board of Regents of the University Wisconsin System black history month chili cook-off parkside asian organization (PAO) peer health segregated university fee allocation committee (SUFAC) winterfest