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https://archives.uwp.edu/files/original/dd002ea9cae2118b6a0bbb904001a81a.pdf
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Title
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University of Wisconsin - Parkside Ranger News
Description
An account of the resource
Student newspaper of UW-Parkside
Text
A resource consisting primarily of words for reading. Examples include books, letters, dissertations, poems, newspapers, articles, archives of mailing lists. Note that facsimiles or images of texts are still of the genre Text.
Issue
Volume 12, issue 30
Headline
Used for newspapers, the Headline element describes the main article of the issue.
Tunkieicz named new Ranger editor
Series Number
The series number of the original collection.
UWPAC124 Ranger News
Text
Any textual data included in the document
Thursday, May 10, 1984 University of Wisconsin-Parkside Vol. 12, No. 30
Tunkieicz named Kby.. Ken MW eyer. new Ranger editor
Editor
News Editor Jennie Tunkieicz
has been chosen the editor of the
Ranger for the 1984-65 academic
year.
Tunkieicz, a sophomore communication
major, served as a staff
writer during her first year at Parkside
after being editor of the Kenosha
Bradford High School newspaper,
the Inferno.
"I am very enthusiastic about
next year's Ranger," said Tunkieicz.
"Our paper has made some
tremendous changes this year because
of Ken Meyer and I hope to
expand and improve upon those
changes."
Tunkieicz wants to make the
Ranger a more integral part of the
Parkside campus next year. "Since
this is a commuter campus," she
said, "I feel that the Ranger can
play a significant role as an information
source for students. This
can be accomplished by e xpanding
on the types and quantity of articles
written about the campus. I'd like
to cover everything that happens on
this campus as well as introduce all
of the interesting people at Parkside
to our readers.
"Next year we will have more articles
concerning Parkside's bordering
communities and we will also
disseminate more information that
pertains to students from the state
level."
One of Tunkieicz' goals for next
year's Ranger is to make staff participation
more of an educational
experience using regular critique
sessions. "At these meetings we
will discuss what went wrong each
week and how to improve it and
also what went well and how to
keep it up."
The hew Ranger editor encourages
all students to take an active
role at Parkside, either by joining a
club or an organization. "I believe
that taking an active role in your
campus is a very important facet of
gaining a well-rounded education.
Parkside is a fantastic university
that has so much to offer-if you're
willing to take the initial step and
get involved."
Tunkieicz said that Ranger is a
good organization to join if your interests
lie in "just about every- "Harmann PAB
by Kari Dixon
With the possible exception of a
newly activated Special Events
Committee, and after basketball entertainment,
the Parkside Activities
Board will not experience any
major changes under its new president,
Keith Harmann, who was
elected two weeks ago.
Harmann is a 21 year old Parkside
senior in communication. He has
been active in PAB for two years.
He was chairman of the film committee
last year and served as vicepresident
this year.
"I like the way that things have
been run," Harmann said. "I don't
foresee any major changes at this
time."
PAB will utilize the Special
Events Committee to a greater capacity
next semester. The committee,
under the direction of Valerie
Olson, is a pre-existing committee
that had never been used. "The
committee will oversee a wide
range of things that don't fall under
any other heading," Harmann said.
Other new officers for PAB are:
Vice-President, Mike Dry; Secretary,
Marie Aiello; Coffeehouse Committee
Chair, Cherie Niccoli; Contemporary
Entertainment, Sandy
Wachs; Film, Randy Zich and Pam
Woodbury; Recreation, Ann
Fralich; Performing Arts/Lectures,
Dan Galbraith; Sight/Sound, Beth
Callahan; and Video, Becky Secanky.
Those duties that Harmann feels
will be his primary concerns next
semester include The End, and
being the spokesperson to the administration
for PAB. "I'm basically
here to make sure that everything
is run right and that everyone
does their job," he concluded.
Keith Harmann
The organization is looking for
new members to take part in all its
committees. Students interested in
joining can stop in at Union D114
or call 553-2650.
thing"-writing (news, feature and
sports), marketing , public relations,
photography or graphic arts.
"No matter how many A's you
get on your report card, there is
nothing more precious than getting
experience," said Tunkieicz. "The
Ranger offers a learning experience
that can't be had in a classroom."
Tunkieicz will soon be filling the
other editorial positions on the
Ranger. Applications for these paid
positions are available in the
Ranger office (WLLC D139) until
June 12. Students interested in joining
the staff a re encouraged to stop
in anytime. Tunkieicz said she will
be on campus throughout the summer,
mainly on Tuesdays and
Thursdays.
AM,
Jennie Tunkieicz
Ranger photos by Dave McEvoy
No smoking! 1l8», G19Z84T. Tnhe^ bmill msayy sF t;htart' ssimg,,o<k5in Tgh ew iPll* b™e a*l>loiwooerd Ainir PauJbTlimc ,B Aupilrdi-l
JmulSy lt, lmsfoo5?. areas desi*Iiated for smoking. The bill is effective after
As an educational facility, Parkside will implement this law such
that a student not seeing a "SMOKING ALLOWED" sign must assume
that smoking is prohibited.
Student Services, acommittee of PSGA (Parkside Student Government
Association) would l ike to implement the act by t he beginning
of the 1984 fall term. The committee will be conducting a survey
among the student body to find out which areas on campus should be
designated for ssmookkiinngg.. Various members of t_h e Sen_a te will go
around the campus with the brief survey and they willask students
who have not been approached and who want to help with this decision
to please fill out the following questionnaire. Student. Services
represents the sudents and is, as on every issue, open to suggestions
and complaints.
Please drop the following completed questionairre in anv PSGA
suggestion box or in the PSGA offi ce (WLLC D139 A).
1) Do you smoke? Yes- No.
2) If you smoke, where do you smoke most often?
3) Where do you mos t dislike peopl e to smoke?
4) Do you think that the Union Square should have smoking/nonsmoking
sections?
Comments :
2 Thursday, May 10,1984
Letters to the Editor
Graduates must
decide on future
To the graduation class of 1984:
As a senior and a May '84 graduate,
I think about the road that lies
ahead, not only for me but for
other graduates as weU. In the past
at many graduation ceremonies, the
President of the Class/Student Government
or Council says how we,
the students, are going to change
this country or world. The speaker
states how we, the students, are
going to go out there and correct all
that wrongs the world (i.e. starvation,
pollution, hatred and war) —
all the things that hamper and
threaten the lives of so many people.
Yet these are only words and always
seem to be forgotten.
For most of us, graduation serves
as a turning point in our lives, for
we will go out in the work force
and obtain "real jobs." For others,
we will continue our education,
seeking out masters and doctorates
and or MD's and JD's. But what
about those who were going to go
out and change the world? Where
are they? Where did they go?
I hope that as you march across
the stage during graduation and as
you continue t o march through life,
you'll think back and reflect on
what you really want out of life —
not what you were pushed into, or
chose to do, due to economic factors,
but what you deep down inside
really want out of life. It is this
factor which you should be striving
for, not any other. It is this factor
of one's life which will help make
this a better world; for people will
be much happier, and in turn, will
let their inner selves show and fulfill
their desires/needs to help humankind.
Bennett J. Schliesman
Why no Chicana voice?
To The Editor:
Last week activities celebrating
Cinco de Mayo took place on this
campus. While we applaud and
strongly support the public celebration
of this important day, we deplore
the fact that, on this campus
at least, Cinco de Mayo appears to
be an exclusively masculine event.
Despite the fact that there are
many Chicanas both on this campus
and in the community who are excellent
and articulate spokespeople
for the Hispanic culture and its history,
not one Chicana was asked to
participate in the public presentations
on campus. Not only does this
omission speak to the strength of
the male-as-expert bias which pervades
this society (and this campus),
it also serves to reinforce the
strong androcentric orientation of
the Chicano culture.
This orientation is perhaps most
obvious in the role of th e "Patron"
who represents and protects HIS
people, and who serves as the public
authority on affairs related to
the Chicano population.
The absence of the Chicana voice
from Cinco de Mayo celebrations
serves to negate the role of women
in Chicano society and to remind
Chicanas that despite legislation
and many decades of social protest
their status in our society is often
blatantly less-than-equal.
Sincerely,
The Faculty of the
Women's Studies Program.
€ € Miser" outstanding
To the Editor:
Outstanding!!! That word best
describes the Parkside Players' interpretation
of "The Miser."
Wow!! What talent!!
The costuming and scenery enhanced
the fantastic job of the performers.
The people who worked in
this area deserve a lot of credit
also.
It was such an enjoyable evening
and will be one of t he highlights of
this school year.
Anyone who missed it really
missed a "hit." Every seat should
have been filled as it was a standing
ovation performance.
Sincerely,
Eva Spalla
RANGER
VO Wt W4/Y/~\
MEWS ITEM: MILWAUKEE MAYOR MEIER URGES CIVIL DISOBEDIENCE
TO PROTEST NON-POINT POLLUTION.
Q. Who is this masked mart
and why is this woman
smiling so much?
Ken Meyer
Editor
A. Because the job as
Ranger editor has
many silly side-effects
Jennie Tunkieicz
New Editor
U
9
*00
c% &
Ken Meyer Editor
Jennie Tunkieicz News Editor
John Kovalic Feature Editor
Patricia Cumbie Sports Editor
Michael Kailas ; Photo Editor
Dave McEvoy Copy Editor
Andy Buchanan Business Manager
Catherine Chaffee Advertising Manager
Jill Whitney Nielsen Distribution Manager
Pat Hensiak Asst. Business Manager
WRITERS
IKt ari Dixon, Br.orbr Kiesling, Carol Kortendick, Jeff TL ei• sgang, R^i.c k
Luehr, Robb Luehr, Dick Oberbruner,
Tony Rogers, Bill Stougaard,
Nick Thome, Sarah Uhlig
PHOTOGRAPHERS
Karen Cairo, Todd Herbst, Karen
Trandel '
Ranger is written and edited by students of UW-Parkside and they
are solely responsible for its editorial policy and content. Published every
urs ay during the academic year except during breaks and holidays.
Hanger ,s printed by the Racine Journal Times.
.. A"™r'^pondence should be addressed to: Pafkside Ranger,Univer
sity of Wisconsin-Parkside, Box No. 2000, Kenosha, Wis. 53141.
, j erJ '° ' e editor will be accepted if typewritten, double-spaced on
standard size paper. Letters should be less than 350 words and must be
igne wit a telephone number included for verification purposes.
Names will be withheld for valid reasons.
Dr. for '*"ers is Tuesday 10 a.m. for publication Thursday.
in fCr fe*erves '* e "ght to refuse letters containing false and defamo-
Tory content • • • • . »j.
RANGER 3 Thursday, May 10,1984
Wofford to speak at commencement
Harris L. Wofford Jr., an international
attorney, two-time university
president and former special assistant
to President John F. Kennedy,
will be the principal speaker at
commencement exercises at Parkside
at 2 p.m. on Sunday, May 20, in
the Physical Education Building.
About 520 members of the December
and May graduating classes
are eligible to participate in the
ceremony, which is open to the
public.
The ceremony will include presentation
of the Chancellor's Award
to the outstanding graduate of the
1983-84 academic class as well as
awards for outstanding achievement
to graduates in eight principal
fields of study.
In addition, the 1984 Distinguished
Alumnus Award will be presented
to Parkside alumnus Rex H.
Brown, vice president of St. Luke's
Hospital in Racine and an active
member of Parkside's Alumni Association
including three terms as
the organization's presidents A 1971
Parkside graduate who majored in
business management, Brown holds
a master's degree in hospital administration
from George Washington
University.
The commencement ceremony
will include a message to the graduates
from Chancellor Alan E. Guskin
and remarks by UW System Regent
Marylln Zirbel, of Bristol, and
UW-P Alumni Association President
E. John Graham of Racine.
Bachelor's and master's degrees
will be conferred by Guskin, acting
Vice Chancellor Ben Greenebaum
and Regent Zirbel.
Wofford, 58, practices law in
'Philadelphia with the firm of Schnader,
Harrison, Segal .and Lewis of
Philadelphia and Washington D.C.,
where his practice includes World
Bank negotiations and international
development financing. He is a
member of the U.S. Supreme Court
Bar.
He served as John F. Kennedy's
campaign coordinator for civil
rights in 1960 and, after the election,
was Sargent Shriver's deputy
in the talent search that filled top
posts in the new administration.
Then, as a special assistant to
President Kennedy, Wofford chaired
the White House group that
spurred federal executive action to
implement the civil rights of black
Americans, and helped Shriver organize
the Peace Corps.
In the 30 years before and after
that period, Wofford's activities
have centered on human and civil
rights concerns, higher education
and promoting world peace.
Wofford served as special counsel
to Father Theodore Hesburgh,
president of Notre Dame, on the
U.S. Commission on Civil Rights
and co-edited the landmark report
of that acclaimed commission in
1959. He worked closely with Dr.
Martin Luther King in the civil
rights movement, is a former trustee
of the King Center, and is past
president of the International
League for Human Rights.
In addition to helping organize
the Peace Corps, Wofford served as
its special representative in Africa
and then as associate director of
the Peace Corps from 1964-66.
Wofford was the founding president
of the State University of New
York Old Westbury campus from
1966-70 and was president of Bryn
Mawr College from 1970-78. He received
his undergraduate degree
from the University of Chicago and
law degrees from Yale Law School
Harris Wofford
and Harvard University Law
School.
Wofford is author of many articles
and books, including "Of Kennedys
and Kings: Making Sense of
the Sixties," published in 1980 and
termed by the Washington Post as
the most important book that year
about politics.
Wofford, a World War n Army
Air Corps veteran, has traveled and
spoken widely in recent years on
behalf of arms control, and is the
coordinator of the drafting committee
for the Arms Control Plank of
the 1984 Democratic Party Platform.
Marshals for the commencement
ceremony will be Prof. James
Shea, chief marshal; Prof. Peter
Hoff, faculty marshal; Prof. Andrew
McLean, graduate degree
marshal; Prof. Herbert Kubly,
bachelor of arts degree marshal;
Profs. Anna Marie Williams and
James Rovelstad, bachelor of science
degree marshals.
Music for the ceremony will be
provided by organist Glenda Mossman,
a Parkside adjunct organ instructor
who will be performing on
a Haygren Custom Electronic
organ. The organ is a gift to the
campus from Mrs. Elmer R. Hermes,
of Racine, the late Mr. Hermes
and trustees of the former
First Congregational United Church
of Christ in Racine, where the instrument
originally was housed.
Following the ceremony a reception
hosted by the Parkside Alumni
Association honoring graduates and
their guests will be held in Main
Place of the Wyllie Library-Learning
Center.
Brown named Distinguished Alumnus
Rex H. Brown, a 1971 University
of Wisconsin-Parkside graduate
who now is the vice president of St.
Luke's Hospital in Racine, has been
named the 1984 UW-Parkside Distinguished
Alumnus and will be
honored at commencement ceremonies
at 2 p.m. on Sunday, May
20, in the Physical Education Building.
Brown, 34, who majored in business
management at Parkside and
went on to earn a master's degree
in hospital administration from
George Washington University,
joined St. Luke's in 1976 as an administrative
resident and since then
has moved up the administrative
ladder, serving as human relations
administrator and vice president of
human relations before being
promoted to his present position.
St. Luke's, 1320 Wisconsin Ave.,
is a 292-bed facility founded in 1872.
As vice president Brown is responsible
for patient care, education
and human relations.
Brown is heavily involved in the
activities of Parkside's Alumni Association,
serving as a founding
president from 1980 to 1983, and he
is active in numerous professional
organizations and community and
civic groups. Those include the
Wisconsin Society for Health Care
Education and Training and the Association
for Hospital Personnel
Administration of Southeastern
Wisconsin as well as local groups
such as the Racine YMCA Marketing
and Membership Committee
and a term as president of the Personnel
Management Council of the
Court to rule on draft, aid
The Solomon amendment, which
ties draft registration to financial
aid Jor male college students, is
being tested by the Supreme Court.
A federal judge in Minneapolis
ruled the law unconstitutional last
summer when a group of anonymous
college students there challenged
the law.
But the Supreme Court issued a
stay, leaving the law in effect until
it makes a ruling, which is expected
in July.
The law has caused protests
around the country, and students
who refuse to register are being
brought to trial. There are several
cases pending nationwide.
But there are no known cases in
the UW-System, as far as financial
aid officers know. They consider
the law to be a headache.
"The general feeling is that it's
just another piece of papa* to add
to our workload," said Parkside's
Financial Aid Director Jan Ocker.
In addition to the extra paperwork,
college financial aid officers
will be expected to catch offenders
beginning next year, which Ocker
said "would be a nightmare we definitely
want to avoid."
Opponents of the law have argued
that the law provides punishment
for students who do not
choose to register, or students who
register late.
But the selective service system
says the law will not be used to
prosecute late registrants, and that
students who do obey the law — by
signing a piece of paper — are not
penalized at all.
Racine Area Manufacturers and
Commerce Association, Inc.
(RAMAC).
Brown also is a member of the
Personnel Directors' Roundtable of
RAMAC and has served as a board
member of the Racine Visiting
Nurse Association.
"I'm honored to be selected as a
1 distinguished alumnus," Brown
said. "UW-Parkside is an enormously
valuable educational and
cultural resource for both Racine
and Kenosha, and has contributed a
great deal to the improvement of
the area. UW-Parkside really is a
link between the two communities,
drawing Racine and Kenosha closer
together."
Brown said that because more
than 80 percent of UW-Parkside
graduates remain in this area "their
achievements are living, tangible
proof of the quality and importance
of the university to the communities
it serves."
Brown said UW-Parkside is a
young institution and its alumni
"will play an ever-increasing role in
improving the quality of life here."
During his tenure as president of
the Alumni Association Brown last
year was instrumental in helping
organize the first Alumni Annual
Fund-Raising Campaign, money
which is being us«i for student
scholarships and books and periodicals
for the university library.
"The enormous success of the
fund-raiser shows a real desire on
the part of UW-Parkside alumni to
help the university — to give something
back to the instituion they got
so much from," Brown said.
Thomas Krimmel, director of development
and alumni affairs at
UW-Parkside, said, "Rex typifies
the attitude and commitment of so
many UW-Parkside alumni who
remain this area after graduating.
They constantly contribute their
talents and energies both to their
communities and to their alma
mater. That is important to UWParkside
as it matures as an institution."
Senior Art Shows
display students' works
The first of three Senior Art
Shows is currently showing in the
Communication Arts Gallery. Brian
Passino, Karen Bolander, Christopher
Ohm, Kathy Colicki and Marilyn
Weschnefski are the featured
artists of the first show. The exhibition
will run through May 20.
Fifteen Parkside art students
will be graduating, and two more
Senior Art shows are scheduled to
show their work. The second show
will run from June 4-14 and the
third from June 18-28.
The works included range from
ceramics and stone carving to
prints and oil paintings. The work
included in the three shows is a
retrospective of the students' tenure
at Parkside.
The gallery hours for the first
show are Monday through Friday
from 1 to 6 p.m. and Tuesday and
Wednesday from 7 to 10 p.m. Gallery
hours for the second and third
shows are Monday through Thursday
from 1 to 6 p.m.
POOOOOOOOOOOOC
Professional
Resume Writing
You've spent thousands of dollars
and years to get your diploma. Do
you want a "quickie" or quality resume
to reflect you and your in- i
vestment? Save your valuable
study time and let the professionals
do it. Call now.
Anne Gontek 639-0570
or
Rachel King 637-5731
(former Parkside student*)
Reasonable rates.
feooooooooooood
FINAL STUDENT PAYROLL CHECKS
If you would like your final check(s) mailed to you, send a
written request to the Payroll Office:
1. In the request include your address and date of check.
2. Attached a self-addressed stamped envelope for each
check.
Optional request forms available at the Union Info Desk
and Payroll Office. Questions? Call 553-2256.
4 Thursday, May 10,1984 RANGER
Accent on Women
Earl discusses women and self-worth
by Jennie Tonldeicz
News Editor -
The Accent on Women program,
which featured a speech by Sheila
C. Earl, attracted 150 people Friday
evening and about 307 attended Saturday's
workshop and seminars.
The program which was held at
Parkside, was co-spopnsored by
Parkside and Gateway Technical
Institute's WO/MEN'S Bureau,
with the aid of the Women's Resource
Colter of Racine.
The Accent on Women steering
committee members include: Bonnie
Friday, Program Specialist,
WO/MEN'S Bureau, Gateway-Racine
campus; Patricia Gibbons,
Counselor, Women's Resource Center
of Racine; Nancy Hare, Public
Information Specialist, Gateway-
Kenosha and Racine campus; Phyllis
Northway, Kenosha County Extension
Home Economist; Judith
Pryor, Coordinator of Instruction,
Library/Learning Center, Parkside;
and Wendi Schneider, Counselor,
Community Student Services, Parkside.
Earl, married to Gov. Anthony
Earl and coordinator of placement
and internship for Robert M. La-
Follette Institute of Public Affairs
at UW-Madison, gave a speech entitled,
"Women and Self Worth," on
Friday.
Reinforcing the self worth of
young women, girls' sports, domestic
abuse and volunteerism were
the topics which Earl stressed during
her talk.
"Abuse haunts all people. Support
victims of domestic abuse and
provide temporary shelter to those
in neejd. Support the community organizations
which offer aid to victims
of domestic violence," urged
Earl.
A staunch supporter of girl's
sports, Earl feels that physical education
for girls is not equal to that
of boys. "When boys play a sport
the stands are filled, for girls it's
another story. The same applies to
college sports," she said. "Something
is wrong with this attitude...it
discriminates."
Earl stressed how important it is
to urge young women to develop
their full potential. She feels that
not striving to reach your full potential
is "an offense against our
creator who provided us all with intrinsic
abilities." Volunteerism is
one way Earl feels women can
achieve their full potential.
A reading entitled "Mothers of
Invention, Daughters of Change"
was presented by the American Association
of University Women-Racine
Branch. The reading demonstrated
how American women have
changed — from the Indians to the
business women of today.
One of the highlights of Friday's
program was the presentation of
the Accent of Women Awards. This
was the first year in the four years
of th e Accent on Women programs'
existence, that such awards were
presented. Susan Poulsen Krough
of the Johnson Foundation, Inc.,
presented the prestigious awards.
Award recipients include: Jeanne
Arnold, for Communications; Bernadette
Elverman, for Volunteerism;
Barbara Hammes, for Human
Services; Mary Kaprelian, for Business
and Industry; and Rosaria Jermanotta,
for Education.
When Kaprelian received her
award, she remarked, "there
should be more conferences like
this to encourage us not to speak
softly and carry lipstick."
RANGER IS N OW ACCEPTING APPLICATIONS FOR THE FOLLOWING STAFF
POSITIONS F OR THE 1984-85 A CADEMIC YEAR.
NEWS EDITOR
FEATURE EDITOR
SPORTS EDITOR
PHOTO EDITOR
COPY EDITOR
ADVERTISING MANAGER
ASST. BUSINESS MANAGER
DISTRIBUTION MANAGER
Requirements: UW-Parkside student in good standing carrying at least
6 credits per semester.
Qualifications: Previous newspaper experience preferred.
All positions are paid
Applications available in the Ranger office D139C
APPLICATIONS ACCEPTED THRU JUNE 12, 1984
Sheila Earl, wife of Gov. Tony Earl, addressed a Friday evening
crowd at the Accent on Women program.
Ranger photo by Michael Kailas Course examines
Vietnam vets
by Jennie Tunldeicz
News Editor
Vietman and the emotional complexity
which surrounded the war
? will be the emphasis of a summer
Humanities Course, 40-260, Forms
of American Culture: Vietnam,
Fact and Fiction. The eight week
course will be offered on Tuesday
and Thursdays from 7:30 -9:35 p.m.
"Ideally, this course will be directed
at two kinds of students:
those too young to have had any direct
contact with the war, and
those students who have had military
experience or who were in the
Vietnam War," said Ken Harper,
who will teach the course.
The course will consist of readings,
films and lectures and visiting
speakers, which are intended to
provoke though and to try and get
at the meaning of the war experience,
according to Harper.
"This is not a course where we
will tell war stories, but we will
look at why veterans tell war stories
and what they mean," said
Harper.
Harper, a Vietman veteran, said
that he is concerned about how little
many students know about the
Vietnam war.
"I am shocked and frightened
when I see how little students know
about a past that could happen to
them very shortly, and they would
be so unprepared," he said. He
feels that the current situation in
Central American has all the makings
of another Vietnam.
The course will also deal with
the myths surrounding veterans of
Vietnam.
"The media concentrates on the
image of the Vietnam veteran as
being deranged and doped. I think
that misses the point. If you look at
Shakespeare's tragic characters you
will find that their disorientation
isn't the result of drugs but because
of a tremendous emotional loss.
Vietnam vets have much deeper
emotions than are talked about."
Harper worked as a veterans'
counselor for two years and has
also been to Veterans' Hospitals
"and I've seen that the abuses of
the war have not aided."
Summer Jobs
Due to special summer program expanding northern
Illinois firm. Must fill several full or part-time
positions. Work in local area. Starting rate *6.85.
Over 18. Car needed.
For information call:
(312) 249-3444
y betweeij*2 and 7 pm
RANGER 5 Thursday, May 10,1984
Chemistry Club
Club Events
The Chemistry Club would like
to thank all of our outgoing officers
for a terrific year: Sharon Rynders
(President), Mark Derosch (Vice-
President), Dawn (Patricia) Taylor
(Secretary), and Karl Nicholas
(Treasurer.
We would like to welcome our
new officers for the year beginning
with the Fall '84 semester: Sharon
Rynders (President-again?), Julie
Debus (Vice-President), Jo Chianello
(Secretary), Drew Kuffel (Treasurer).
Congratulations and best of
luck for the upcoming year!
We would also like to thank our
advisers, Dr. Ward and Dr.
Branchini, for supporting our every
endeavor.
Last but not least, we would like
to thank everyone who has made
the past year a success by their participation
in our club's events. We
hope to see you all next year-we've
got a great one planned. Have an
excellent smmer.
Dart Team
Hello, Darters, non-darters,
Nick and other furry creatures and
extremely dedicated administrators.
The Dart Team will hold its
final meeting on Friday, May 11 at
1 p.m. in the Rec Center.
Topics to be discussed include
the Great American Steak Out H,
the smmer plans and a Brewers
game outing. Since this is the last
meeting of the semester, it would
be nice if some members showed
up. In other words, be there or
suffer the consequences!
BSO
BSO Picnic. All a re invited to attend.
Free food, free drinks and
recreation. The picnic is on Friday,
May 11, starting at noon at Petrifying
Springs Park.
Peer Support
I want to thank the following
people for serving as officers for
Peer Support 1983-84: Laverne
Christensen, Treasurer; Pierre
Darcy, Secretary; Heidi Fallak,
Vice President.
I want to congratulate the following
people for serving as officers
for Peer Support 1984-85: L aVerne
Christensen, President; Alice Johnson,
Vice-President; Rosalie
Mutchler and Valerie Maynard, Co-
Treasurers.'
(From Pam Brouwers.)
PSE
PSE officers and member would
like to thank everyone for their
help and support for the 1983-84
school year. TTiis club wouldn't be
what it is today without the encouragement
and hard work of its members
and sponsors. A special thanks
to adviser Mort Rovelstad for his
help and direction. With this year's
participation, next year promises to
be even better.
Vets' Club
Officers for the 1984-85 Veterans'
Club were chosen at Monday's
meeting. Those voted in were Mike
Bielke for president, Chuck Hauser
for vice-president and Peggy
Krumm for secretary/treasurer.
Early entries for the Second Annual
Vets' Run for Fun are still
being accepted. The five-mile run
will take place on Saturday, May 19
at 9 a.m. Formore information,
contact Rich Welbon at 554-1866 or
Peggy Krumm at 652-1189.
Clubs hold Beginning of End 99
PSE (The Marketing Club) and
PAC (Parkside Association of Communicators)
are co-sponsoring an
addition to Parkside's "The End,"
called "The Beginning of The
End." This event is designed to
start off the weekend festivities
with a real bang.
"The Beginning of The End" will
be held at Sander's Park (Section
No. 8) in Kenosha at noon on Friday,
May 18. Johnsonville brats will
be served for 81 each and a $2 ticket
gets you a ll the Miller Beer you
can drink. A volleyball net will be
up, and a 16" softball game is
planned.
Tickets can be purchased from
any PSE or PAC member this week
and next week. All Parkside students
and their friends are welcome.
Finish off the year right by
going to "The End" and start "The
End" off right by going to "THe
Beginning of The End."
Ranger
needs
writers,
photographers,
graphic
artists
and reps
(make $$$).
Stop by
Ranger
office, WLLC
D139 (next
to Coffee
Shoppe).
Law scholarship offered
Carol Fennema, President of
Legal Auxiliary of Wisconsin-Kenosha
County, has announced that
the group, as part of its 1984 Law
Day Celebr ation, will award a $500
scholarship, based on merit, to a
law student. The recipient must be
a resident of Kenosha County, and
must be accepted at and planning
to attend, or presently attending, a
Wisconsin Law Schoo l.
The deadline for applying is
September 10. Students interested
may call or write for an application
to: Mrs. John V. Evans, 7822 39th
Avenue, Kenosha, WI 53142 , Telephone
694-5855 or 553-2614.
I
Tin a 22 year old high
school dropout who will
earn $40,000 in 1984!
Based on my earnings so far at $15.50/hr. plus overtime, I'll earn
over $40,000 for 1984 as a lithographic stripper/film assembler
for printing in the Graphic Arts Industry. Think of what you
could do with a college education. I love my job and now I want
to tell others how to teach themselves as I did. If you've thought
about the grapic arts but weren't sure if it was right for you, find
out now by sending for POCKET PAL, the best and most comprehensive
book I know of if you're searching for one of the
numerous, challenging, creative, well-paying career opportunities
in graphic communications...such as printing, publishing,
advertising, photography, computer proglramming, chemist,
graphic design, layout artist or sales. This industry makes up
one of the largest manufacturing industries in the world today.
This is definitely not one of those get-rich-quick schemes. It's for
men and women serious about their career future.
Send check or money order for only $9.95 (postpaid) and I'll include
my list of books and publications covering the industry,
plus a brief informative letter on how I got involved. Or send
just $2.00 for the list and my letter (money refundable towards
first order) to: Roger Horton, Horton Enterprises, Dept. 4,
1824-54th St., Kenosha WI 53140. Please allow 2-3 weeks
for -delivery. And welcome to an exciting career! « « .
Proesel awarded
Honors distinction
by Mary Ginther
Jayne Proesel. Crazy or dedicated?
The answer is both, with a variation—
crazily dedicated. Why?
Proesel, a Communication major
graduating with "Distinction" in
the Honors Program this May, has
acquired 24 credits of Honors coursework-
nine credits beyond t he required
amount.
"I first enrolled in the Honors
Seminars-" Explaining Things" and
"Imagination"-in the fall of 1982.1
was also taking a Communication
course for Honors credit. After that
semester, my interest and initiative
were piqued. I made up my mind
then to just keep on going."
Proesel, a non-traditional student
and mother of four teenagers, completed
her degree in three years. "I
came back to school after a 19
years 'vacation,' and decided to not
waste any time. The Honors courses-
bo th the Seminars and coursework-
have enhanced my educational
experience."
Proesel is the sole graduate of
the Honors Program this year. She
is pleased with all she has accomplished
and gained from her involvement
in the program. "I've
gained so much from the program.
The Seminars are fun, informative,
Jayne Proesel
and interesting. Coursework for Honors
credits in my classes made
them more worthwhile and useful.
I was allowed to take my own work
in the direction I wanted. That's
the neatest thing about it."
What are Proesel's plans for
after graduation? "A three week
vacation in Hawaii as a reward, and
to restore my energies," she chuckled.
*Then in the fall I'll be taking
some business classes, and maybe
finishing up my second major-psychology.
Yep, more classes-so
maybe 'crazily dedicated' is the correct
term." McLean edits book
Parkside English professor Andrew
M. McLean has edited a book
of works by 16th century English
bishop William Barlowe, whose
support of a religious movement
called the Reformation helped establish
the Protestant Church.
Titled "The Works of William
Barlowe Including Barlowe's Dialogue
Against the Lutheran Factions,"
the book is published by
Sutton Courtenay Press of Appleford,
England.
McLean wrote a brief biography
of Barlowe for the book as well as
extensive notes to the texts, which
often are small essays on the literature,
history and theology of th e period.
The book is part of the Courtenay
Library of Reformation Classics
series, which seeks to make
available scholarly editions of important
documents detailing the
historical theology of the Reformation.
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Special discount to Parkside sfudents'arid faculty.
Contest winners announced
Mexican
holiday
The children's portion of the Hispanic folk-dance troupe performed
Friday for Parkside's first observation of the Mexican Independence
holiday Cinco de Mayo. Photo by Michael Kailas
Winners in the southeastern
Wisconsin-northeastern Illinois portion
of the International Computer
Problem-Solving Contest sponsored
by Parkside have been announced.
The contest was held at Parkside
and 450 other testing stations
around the world on Saturday,
April 28. Fo rty-three teams of one
to three persons competed in three
divisions at Parkside.
The area winners, whose scores
will be judged along with those
from other testing sites to determine
the top ten world-wide winners
are:
Senior High Division (grades 10-
12): First place, a team from A. E.
Stevenson High School in Prairie
View, 111. composed of Mark
Thompson and Marc Kazen; second
place, a single-member team from
Washington Park High School in
Racine composed of Keith Stattenfield;
third place, a team from
Prairie School in Racine composed
of Steve Schmidt and Jon Johnson.
Junior Division (grades 7-9):
First place, a team from McKinley
Junior High School i n Racine composed
of Andrew Mauer and Rick
Balsano; second place a team from
Stevenson High in Prairie View, Dl.
composed of Brian Jacobson, Andy
Hush and Andreas Schmalz; and
third place, another team from
Stevenson High composed of
Shyam Krishnam, Peter Apostalakis
and Mike Garrison.
Elementary Division (grades 4-
6): First place, a team from Golda
Meir Elementary in Milwaukee
composed of David Mandelin,
Becky Hankwitz and Bo Bigelow;
second place, another team from
Golda Meir composed of Eric Oehler,
Mike Schmerling and Nick Welter;
and third place, a one-man
team from Elmwood Elementary
in Elmwood, 111. composed of Howard
Salter.
The winning teams will be awarded
trophies.
Other local teams competing in
the contest came from Tremper
High School in Kenosha, and, from
Racine County, Union Grove High
School, J.I. Case High School and
Walden ED Alternative High School.
Parkside Prof. Donald Piele, organizer
of the international competition,
said results from the 450
testing stations will be sent to Parkside,
where world-wide winners
will be determined. This year, students
in 44 states and 13 foreign
countries participated.
Scholarship Day honors over 100 students
The annual Scholarship Day at
Parkside on April 29 resulted in
awards and honors for more than
100 students.
The program, sponsored by the
campus Awards and Ceremonies
Committee, included an address by
Parkside alumnus Tom Beck, winner
of the 1983 Distinguished Alumnus
Award and president and cofounder
of Unico foe., Franksville.
The event also included remarks
by Parkside economics professor
William Rieber, winner of the 1983
Teaching Excellence Award.
Chancellor Alan E. Guskin
presented the awards.
Scholarships
Bernard C. Tallent Scholarships
of $400 each, which memorialize
the former dean of the university's
Kenosha campus, went to LaVonne
Michaud (Science), Kenosha; Jonathan
Wynstra (Science), Racine;
and Peggy Rasmussen (Social Science),
Racine.
The Joanne M. Esser Scholarship
of 8200, for a student interested in
ecology, went to Susan Miller (Science),
Racine.
Kenneth L. Greenquist Scholarships
of $250 each, which are
named for the former university
Regent and Racine attorney and
civic leader, wait to Connie Jacklin
(Business and Administrative Science),
Kenosha; and Kim Van Alkemade,
Racine.
Irvin G. Wyllie Scholarships of
8250 each, named for Parkside's
founding chancellor, wait to Susan
Hilmer (Business and Administrative
Science), Racine; and Maria
Veronico (Business and Administrative
Science and Behavioral Science),
Burlington.
William W. P etrie Labor and Industrial
Relations Scholarships of
8200 ea ch went to Thomas Decker
(Business and Administrative Science),
Kenosha (8100 of wh ich was
contributed in matching funds by
Parkside's Alumni Assocation); Hilmer
(see above); and Denise Wilcox
(Business and Administrative
Science), Racine.
The Johnson Wax Award of 8100
in science went to Suzanne Weisner
(Science), Kenosha.
The Sam Poerio Award of 8100,
named for the late Kenosha educator
and athletic coach, went to
Wendy Westphal (Education), Kenosha.
The Robert Bauer Scholarship of
8300, to memorialize a Parkside
alumnus who drowned two years
ago, went to Mark Christensen (Science),
Racine.
Two "Big Eight" Milwaukee accounting
firms sponsored scholar-
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ships for three Parkside business
management students in accounting.
The scholarships were funded
by the firms and their employees
who are Parkside graduates.
Ernst and Whinney Scholarships
went to Pamela Gyger (8500), Pa ddock
Lake; and Patricia Lenz
(8300), Racine.
The Peat, Marwick, Mitchell
Scholarship of 8100 went to Laurie
Maes, Racine.
The Financial Executives Institute
Scholarship of 8300, from the
y southeastern Wisconsin c hapter of
the International Organization of
Chief Financial Officers of major
corporations and banks, went to
Gyger, also.
Faculty and
Alumni Association
Matching Fund
Scholarships
Fourteen students received
scholarships through fund-raising
efforts by Parkside faculty members
in various academic divisions.
That money was met with matching
funds from Parkside's Alumni Association's
annual fund-raising campaign,
which last year raised more
than 819,000 from Parkside alumni.
Seven Science Division scholarships
were awarded. Receiving 8200
each were Sharon Rynders, Kenosha;
Margaret Perozzo, Kenosha;
John Wynstra, Racine; Joan Zelin- gsr, Racine; and Jan Meyle, Union
rove.
Receiving 8100 each were Cynthia
Lange, Racine; and Thomas
Siewert, Racine.
Two Business and Administrative
Science Division sch olarships were
awarded. Ronald Bedard, Union
Grove, received 8200 (half of which
was contributed by F. Jerome
Berre, president of Pioneer Products,
Inc. in Racine); and Mary
Matton, Racine, received $200.
Four students received scholarships
from the Fine Arts and Humanities
divisions: Russell Johnson,
Racine, in the music discipline
and Connie Kowalski, Racine,, in
the dramatic arts discipline, each
received 8200; Rita Turner, Kenosha,
and Rachel Klees, Kenosha,
both in the art discipline, each received
8100.
Kenosha Foundation
Award Recipients
Sixteen Parkside students who
live in Kenosha and Kenosha County
received scholarship awards
from the Kenosha Foundation, a
group of local philanthropists. The
students were Kim Anderson, 8500;
Thomas Decker, 8300; Connie Jacklin,
8100; LaVo nne Michaud, 8100;
Charles Neustifter, 8300; Mary P eltier,
8300; Margaret Parozzo, 8350;
Elizabeth Phillips, 8300; Jill
Richetto, 8500; Sharon Rynders,
8300; Mary Sa nchez, 8500; Gregory
Sepanski, 8350; Jamie Tomasello,
8350; James Twomey, 8350; D iane
Vaccarello, 8300; Linda Winzer,
8500; Linda Sanders, 8500; and
Jayne Proesel, 8300.
Certificate Awards
Certificates of recognition citing
students for academic excellence
and creative achievement and
awarded by various academic disciplines,
went to:
From Kenosha and Kenosha
County: Ginger Beningo, Denise
Gerou, Jennifer Gray, Pamela K.
Gyger, Lois Herr, Timothy S. Houden,
Carmella Imbrogno, Kenneth
s, Joseph Landa, Fredrick T.
£
Lawler, Thomas Lois, Jenny Lowrance,
John Matranga, Charles
Neustifter, Robert Oik, James Samica,
Daryl R. Sauer, Steven F.
hreiner, Kurt A. Sorensen, Elizabeth
Spahr.
From Racine and Racine County:
James Aceto, Mary V. Barranco,
June Bauer, Cheryl Buckley,
James Carrington, John Caspers,
Margaret Clarke, John Cogan, Anne
Marie Cooper, Susan A. Daye, John
Ertl, Tim Fox, Susan Hilmer, Kurt
Continued on Page 17
Child Care Center
Fatherhood takes on new perspectives by Marilyn Noreen
Did you know that there is a
Men's Liberation Movement? In
terms of men's family roles, the
current literature states that there
is a new, emergent perspective on
fathering. This new perspective
states: "Men are psychologically
able to participate in a full range of
parenting behaviors; furthermore,
it may be good for both parents and
children that men take active roles
in child care and child rearing."
There are two general dimensions
of f atherhood. The first is the
survival dimension in which the
father acts to sustain the physical
livelihood and value premises of his
family. The second is the expressive
dimension, in which the father
ideally contributes a sense of security
to his family and adds a sense
of pleasure or significance to its activities.
In the survival dimension, the
father is the male adult whom the
children see most often; he is more
likely than anyone else to symbolize
manhood to his children as a living
reality, and at least as likely as
mother to be a model for simply
Campus
bookstore
well
received
by Jill Whitney Nielsen
The campus bookstore is concluding
its second year at Parkside
and has been very well received by
both faculty and students in its selection
and prices.
The prices of books are industrydetermined,
with new books being
marked up 20 percent and used
books at 25 percent less than new.
"Unless they (other universities)
have a surcharge, our prices should
be pretty much in line," stated
Nancy Schroeder, manager of the
bookstore. "The students pretty
much take (the prices) in stride.
Generally students feel books are
expensive..they accept it, I think,
overall."
The bookstore also has a buyback
service at the end of each
semester. Each book that will be
used in upcoming semesters is
bought back from the students at
50%. Schroeder said, "Buy-back is
really a good service because it allows
us to give students a better selection
from used books."
So far there haven't been many
complaints, but Schroeder is always
willing to listen and get the students'
point of view.
The bookstore is not only for
books. It carries a variety of items,
from school supplies to clothing. "I
think it's also a place people like to
come in and just browse. Overall,
we've gotten a good reception. We
work very hard to do the best we
can and have gotten a lot of postive
l eedback," said Schroeder.
being human. For example, the
way the father relates to his wife
serves as a model for the husband
role in the eyes of his children. Parents
pass on some part of the formula
for marital accommodation to
their children. Parents who exhibit
actual behavior in the area of skills
are more important than empty
wishes they have for their children.
For example, parents who have
good read ing habits will instill good
reading habits in their children.
The transmission of p ersonal qualities
include undesirable traits as
well.
In the expressive dimension,
fathers can do a number of things
that help to keep in check feelings
of anxiety and insecurity on the
part of their children and that contribute
to a more or less continuous
feeling among family members that
life is worthwhile. The father's expressive
"work" includes such activities
as providing bodily comfort
to the children, showing love and
respect for them, playing with
them and giving the ir lives a sense
of immediate significance. He promotes
a measure of security in children
by being interested in them as
no other man is and by his very
presence as countless problems
arise and are settled. Since father
does not provide the more routine
comforts (such as bathing, dressing,
feeding, etc.), he has to work har-
History Professor John Buenker is shown with his daughter, former
PSGA President Jeanne Buenker-Phillips. Prof. Buenker is an expert
on the subject of fathering and nurturing since he. is a single parent
with five children.
der than mother to be of expressive
significance, especially in the positive,
pleasure-giving sense of the
term. He must make an effort to do
such things as taking the children
to the circus, telling them stories,
playing games, making jokes and so
on. As expected, fathers who take
their children places and are frequently
willing to "have fun" with
them are especially well-liked.
Michael Lamb's research suggests
that well-adjusted children
come from families in which father
is an active, involved p arent, form-
Pogreha worsens
The condition of ex-PSGA Pre sident
Phil Pogreba, who suffered
numerous injuries and brain damage
in a Sept. 17 automobile accident
last year, has deteriorated.
A shunt operation intended to relieve
the pressure on his brain was
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Ranger photo by Bob Riesling
ing close relationships with his children.
In addition, it has been found
that fathers can be just as affectionate,
nurturant, responsive and active
with their children as mothers
are. Mothers and fathers have different
parental styles, and children
react differently to fathers than to
mothers.
There are a number of factors
which appear to influence the degree
of paternal involvement in chi-
Idrearing. The list includes the family
socioeconomic status, the number
and ages of children (and parents),
the status of the wife's employment,
self-concept of the father
and androgynous versus traditional
orientation to sex role behavior
generally and in family work. These
factors are still not sufficient to insure
that father will be the active,
nurturant, loving parent he is capable
of being. What seems to be the
determining factor is the value so
ciety places on such paternal behavior.
Our society must shed its
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rigid, homophobic, sexist cloak th at
prevents men from being se nsitive
to and nurturing with children.
As James Levin (author of Who
Will Raise the Children?) wrote, "If
men are encouraged from childhood
through adolescence and adulthood
to feel that their own sense
of personal identity can be built on
direct caring, and not just on
providing, they will feel less of a
need to invest everything in breadwinning
and career."
The modern father is endeavoring
to demonstrate to his children
that a father does not always have
to be in control or always have the
final solution to every problem;
that he can be in error and learn
from others. As he admits the
above traits, he will exhibit a greater
comfort with expressions of love,
joy, fe ar and sadness. He will re cognize
that such feelings in no way
detract from his masculinity, but in
reality will assist him in assuming a
more positive, androgynous personhood.
Boys and girls will benefit
from observing a father who is a
more humanly open, affectionate
person. Children learn to be adults
by watching adults; and if they see
men doing more nurturing, boys
will learn to nurture more naturally
and girls will learn to accept it
more readily.
Men who have already recognized
their natural capabilities of
fathering will learn from their children
and recognize the spiritual
gifts of love, joy and genuine acceptance
young children so eagerly
share. Robert DiGiulio summarizes
the many thoughts of this article by
saying, "Free your mind of sex ro le
stereotypes and plunge into the
business of giving what you've already
got — the qualities of the
human spirit that will make your
child a real man or woman."
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RANGER
PSGA looks forward to busy year
by Carol Kortendick
Scott Peterson, PSGA president,
said the organization is busy wrapping
up this semester as well as
planning for the fall. Projects the
organization i s working on to close
the year are: spending the remainder
of their segregated fees, looking
into some campus problems and
setting goals for next fall.
One project which Peterson
would like to help is a Top Senior
Minorities Banquet for the surrounding
high sc hools. The banquet
will be held here at Parkside. Peterson
feels the banquet may encourage
future minority enrollment
and in volvement at Parkside.
This summer, PSGA is sending
four women to Washington, D.C.
for a women's Leadership Conference.
The four participants are Pat
Hensiak, Jeanne Phillips, Terry
Tunks and Ernestine Weisinger.
Student senator Greg Holcomb is
currently looking into the parking
stuation. PSGA is curious as to
where the money goes from the
parking perpermits and tickets.
Another area of interest for
PSGA is vandalism, especially in
the library. From this gained information,
Peterson hopes PSGA can
educate the students on vandalism.
A couple of weeks ago, a fire
alarm went off. Nothing was done,
no one evacuated the school, and
the professors resumed their lectures.
"Even though it was a false
alarm, we want to find out why
nothing was done," said Peterson.
PSGA is hoping to put some
rights back into the students'
hands. Peterson is pushing to get
the faculty senate to support the
faculty's returning exams to the
students. "We took the text, the
tests are ours," Peterson stated. He
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believes the returned tests are a
good way for students to learn. Peterson
added, "It's also good for
the faculty because they'll have to
make up new tests. It'll be a learning
experience for them also."
Peterson is supporting the new
admissions policy. Conditional admission
students will be required to
have special advising. "This is prescriptive
advising," said Peterson,
"for high risk students." High risk
students are those who are lacking
in some necessary academic area.
Some may have reading problems
or math difficulties. "This should
keep students either from transferring
or flunking out," added Peterson.
According to Peterson, there will
also be an admissions committee
with two student seats. If you're
not accepted, you can appeal to this
committee, said Peterson. "This
should lift up high school requirements."
By next fall, PSGA hopes to have
phones in the Union and Communication
Arts parking lots. "I'd like to
see PSGA pay for a part of it. It
would be a grat service to the students,"
said Peterson.
In keeping with his campaign
promises, Peterson will continue to
kkeep his eye on the Union, "flu
stand right behind any decisions of
PUAB. I want to make sure 20
ounce beers stay in the Union," assured
Peterson.
Corporate sponsorship
policy reviewed
by Carol Kortendick
There is a proposed policy for all
student organizations on the Parkside
campus to follow when seeking
corporate sponsorship for an event,
whether on or off campus.
"Corporate Sponsorship shall
mean: The involvement of a noncampus
organization (whether for
profit or non-profit) in the production
of an event being sponsored by
a campus organization." At
present, the policy is not finalized
and Assistant Chancellor Carla
Stoffle is still reviewing it.
Scott Peterson, president of
Parkside Student Government Association,
questioned the first line.
He wondered why other campus organizations
are excluded from this
policy. Peterson felt this policy
should include everyone involved
with the university, whether student,
faculty or alumni.
"If the policy is for students
alone, then let the students write
it," Peterson added. The Corporate
Sponsorship committee is composed
of one administrator, Buddy
Couvion, and two students, Keith
Harmann and Valerie Olson. In Peterson's
opinion, the policy is saturated
with Couvion's influence.
Another section of the policy that
Peterson disagreed with is where it
states, "When using campus facilities
for the proposed event, the
sponsor must pay the facilities'
rental costs." Peterson's conflict
resulted because he believes though
the corporation comes from the
outside, it's a student event they
are sponsoring.
"At UW-Milwaukee, students
can't receive funds for events from
the school unless they go to outside
companies for financial assistance
first," Peterson said. He said there
should be some limits for corporate
sponsored events, but the policy is
going a bit too far. "It all stems
back t o beer companies sponsoring
events. The administration thinks
we have a drinking problem," Peterson
concluded.
Academic staff
recognized
This past year, Academic Staff
has received quite a bit of attention.
The attention started when the
Board of Regents requested the
System Review of academic staff to
do an extensive review on academic
staff. The Regents had become curious
about the academic staff and
were looking specifically for information
dealing with academic staff
policies and procedures. As a result
of this extensive review, the Regents
have approved 20 recommendations
by t he system review.
One recommendation that was
approved by Regents was a systemwide
study of all UW Universities
from April 198 4 to the next April of
academic staff policies and procedures.
Stu Rubner, chairman of Parkside's
Staff Committee, stated it was
recommended to the Chancellor
that a committee be formed consisting
of academic staff, faculty,
students and someone from the
Chancellor's office to closely review
academic staff policies and procedures
and recommend any changes
to be made concerning academic
staff.
"This past year, the academic
staff has gotten a lot of attention,"
stated Rubner. "Academic staff is
being listened to more, such as
with the new admissions policy.
The academic staff gave lots of
input. Faculty is now realizing that
academic staff does have a role to
play in the university system."
Rubner added that his personal
feeling is that this change comes
about because of general good feelings
between academic staff and
faculty and not just because it came
out of the Regents. '
RANGER
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Attention
ANYONE WITNESSING car accident
with dark green Omni Thursday,
April 19, please call campus
Security. It was hit and run.
Services Offered
PORTRAITS. ANIMALS people,
drawn from photos. Professional,
reasonable!! Rachel Klees. 652-
3897.
For Sale
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$100. 552-7190.
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overdrive, 42,000 miles, hard top
and soft top, AM/FM cassette. Call
633-808C or 637-9865.
Help Wanted
THE UW PARKSIDE office of
Public Information is seeking a student
experienced in all phases of
photography, including shooting,
developing and printing black and
white pictures, to work part-time.
The job will require some evening
and weekend work. Applicant must
have working knowledge of funda-
Personals
SUSAN: ROSES and candle light
dinners aren't all. Be ready for a
big surprise. Love, MTO.
ATTENTION: PIGS for sale or
rent, THE OFFICE.
THE OFFICE'S favorite show is
Pigs in Space.
ATTENTION: MISS Piggy-lookalike
contest in Union — sponsored
by -Office.
ATTENTION: NOMINATE your
favorite pig into office.
ATTENTION: COUPLES: The office
is a no porking zone.
ATTENTION: LOOKING for pigs
to join the office.
PIGS NEEDED: Any size, shape,
color, bring references — the office.
PORKERS: PIG out first at the
first annual pig roast.
PORKIES m premieres in the office,
be there.
I'LL HUFF & puff and blow your
office down.
CARMELLA: YOU'RE graduating!!!
Remember, it's a pig's
world!
JANITORS: TREES cause more
pollution than the office. Ronald
Reagan.
NAME WITHHELD gets his advice
from the janitors.
THEY HAVE an IQ of 144-before
dividing it by 12.
THAT'S ABOUT 200% higher than
those who dwell in the office.
RON JON- you're a sweetheart!
The past two weeks have been
great!! Thanks, ME
KAESTNER: YOU DICK!!!
SMURF: I'M looking forward to
this summer and you. Ogre.
A.K. I'M sure the entire nation
would be proud to have an anal retentive
race walker represent our
country in L.A.
NOTICE: GUS will be celebrating
his birthday three days early, on
Sunday, May 20,1984 at THE END.
Attendance is mandatory. P.S.
Please bring presents.
ATTENTION: DON'T miss the
party for Gus May 20th.
HELP THE GREAT ONE celebrate
on May 20, 1984.
EVERYBODY WILL have a great
time at the party (birthday), Sunday,
May 20th.
LET'S MAKE the birthday an
event to remember...
DON'T FORGET the birthday
party, May 20th, 1984.
T I L Y! ! ! ! And I couldn't be
happier!! You are the sun that
lights my life and warms my heart,
TILYFEAE! Love, Looper.
BILL, THANKS for the classified.
Here's yours. Carol
D.B. HAVE a great summer with
Mr. B.J. Crabb - S.S.
OGRE: I'D love to split those
olives with you, Smurf.
DOC H.G. Have a great summer!
Take it easy! Kath.
LEGS 27: How about dinner and a
meeting? Sister Christian.
LEGS 27: Maybe you have other
social engagements? Sister Christian
DIZ (UGSY): Astronomy is gonna
be great! Love dum (WINKIE).
ANNIE: RIDING together was fun.
Wish you were staying, Kath.
KATE: HAPPY 20th. We love you.
US
SIDNEY, GONAD, Shorty and
Bran: Don't worry Tristan DIES
next time, and slowly, to boot.
Signed Odin or Lovitar, depending
on your perspective.
CHANCELLOR GUS KIN: Is it true
you're going to halve alcohol consumption
on campus by going on
the wagon? Enjoy the lamp, John
Kovalic.
NICK: HOW appropriate. A limp
dart from a limp dart player. Yankee
scumdog. (Your OSWALD is
waiting for you.) Your loving feature
editor.
DICK: YOU will go on a long voyage.
Distrust zucchini. A worm in
the hand is worth four and a half
alcohol policies. Thanks for all,
John K.
SARAH: JUST keep a sharp eye
out for those Parkside Activities
Bureaus, drunkard, scum, and have
a really great summer. Thanks for
everything. John.
CATHERINE: WHAT can I say?
You're the greatest. Thanks for
keeping me Stateside. I love you,
John.
RICK: IS it true about you and the
cucumber? (He ain't someone, he's
my brother.) Be sure not to jackknife.
Keep OSWALD in a safe
place. Thanks for everything. JK
DR. BILL: Eric lives! (But the
Rabbi doesn't.) See you in the
temple of Lociatar! FLAPFLAPFLAPFLAPFLAPFLA.
PFLAPFLAP.
Thanks for the comic relief.
Your loving dungeon master.
CATHERINE: HAPPY Happy
Happy!! Meet me in the gardens of
Siam for some heavy duty necking.
There or the Chartroom. Happy
Birthday Kiddo.
TO A certain sports editor...you
girls are all alike. All you want are
those P.E. coaches' sunbathed bodies.
Am I right? Here's to Mad
town. A certain feature editor.
JENNY: CONGRATS, ED! Welcome
to the working week! Let
them all talk; downtime is over.
BUT WATCH out for those Chicago
curves, OK?? It's been fun. John K.
KATH: ARRGH! Your teenage innocence
is lost!!! It's the big Two-
Oh, but have a great birthday anyway.
John, the weird English guy.
ALPHA THETA Rho, a private fraternity,
has 8 positions for new
members. If you have what it takes,
ATR wants you. For more information,
contact Curtis Neal, 634-1994,
ext. 223
BOB: A summer full of me. Whee!!
TO ALL the Ranger people, have a
nice summer vacation. See all those
who are returning next fall, to
those who aren't, good luck in Mad
City. Groupie Brenda.
CONGRATULATIONS, DONNA
and John. Have a nice rest of your
life. Donna won't hit the baby in
front of the dad. All our love, the
Buchanans.
TO THE father BIG EIGHT
TEETH. Let's have a rendezvous at
Kings Cross station in London together,
the three of us can go home
to your NEWCASTLE. Meet us
there if you survive your finals.
May 19th, Love your American
wife.
PAULA AND Cindy, good luck in
surviving finals. Think of me while
I'm away. I will return with trinkets
for both you and Amy, too.
Cindy, I think we should have a big
party for our birthdays this year.
We'll be thinking of you, love
Brenda and Ross.
MARGI: "ON behalf of the academy,
I would like to accept this
award for Parkside's most experienced
report writer. This award
will look especially nice on the
dashboard of my car." Job well
done, Blanche.
POLLY: WHAT can I tell you,
young'n. You're a real cutey
doops!!! Each week your comments
boost my morale. Besides
that, I learned about DUCKIE
FLAMBAY.
CATHERINE: A happy 20th!!
Love, K & J
JOHN: LET'S have some cold dammi
ts.
PATTY, JOHN, Catherine and-
Michael-give my regards to Mad-
Town. Dr. B.
KEN: THANK you so much for all
the help. You're a great teacher
and editor. I've got some big shoes
to fill. Good luck to you and keep
in touch. J.T.
RICK AND Carol-I'll pick the highest
bidder! I can be bribed.
SUZY Q.: Keep on rockin', keep on
rollin'! See ya next year!! Joey.
J&D: HAVE a great summer. Love
J.
STEVE: THANKS for the best year
of my life! With anticipation I look
to our future! Love forever, Sandi!
KEN, JILL and Jennie: I'll miss
you, have a great summer! Joey.
Continued on Page 16
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For complete details, contact Rich Babcock at Berman-Shaver
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2 Fifth St., Racine, 637-1224 or 652-6011
University of Wisconsin-Parkside
10 Thursday, May 10,1984
THE END
May 19 & 20
1984
Parkside Activities Board
Saturday, May 19
am
Donnie Iris and the Cruisers will perform Sunday,
May 20 at 9:30 p.m. on the Union Patio.
VETS' RUN
Inner-Loop Road
10 am VOLLEYBALL TOURNAMENT
Flagfootball Field — Rain or Shine
WHIFFLEBALL TOURNAMENT
Flagfootball Field — If rain, cancelled
11 am FAMILY BOWLING AND RECREATION
Recreation Center
FOOD, SODA AND BEER AVAILABLE
MUSIC OF BREW COUNTY ROUNDERS
Union Square
NOON FAMILY GAMES
East of Molinaro & Greenquist —
If rain, Union Bazaar
ICE CREAM EATING CONTEST
Outside
MAGICIAN
In Cinema
CARTOONS
Union Cinema
4 pm DOORS TO TENT OPEN
Union Square
BAR-BE-QUE CHICKEN DINNER
Tent, Union Patio
MUSIC OF PAF FRATH and DYKHUIS
Tent. Union Patio
6:30 pm MUSIC OF SOUTHERN KNIGHTS
Tent, Union Patio
9:30 pm MUSIC OF MIDNITE FLYER, countryrock
Tent, Union Patio
12:30 am MOVIE: HAROLD & MAUDE
Union Square
SHUTTLE BUS AVAILABLE
11:30 pm and 1:30 am Kenosha
12:30 am and 2:30 am Racine
Food, soda, free coffee available
11 am — 2:30 am
Beer 11 am —
Sunday, May 20
5 pm DOORS TO TENT OPEN
Union Square
6:30 pm MUSIC OF SWEET CHEEKS
Tent, Union Patio
9:30 pm MUSIC OF DONNIE IRIS
Tent, Union Patio
12:30 am MOVIE: HAROLD & MAUDE
Union Square
SHUTTLE BUS AVAILABLE
Follows Night Bus Route
11:30, 12:30, 1:30, 2:30
TICKET PRICES FOR EVENTS IN THE TENT
one dav two days
Students/Alumni $5.00 $8.00
Students/Alumni 6.00 N/A
Faculty/Staff 5.00 9.00
Faculty/Staff 6.00 N/A
Children (age 13-17) 4.00 7.00
Children (age 13-17) 5.00 N/A
Children (age 6-12) 2.00 4.00
Children (age 6-12) 2.50 N/A
Guests 6.00 10.00
Guests N/A N/A
ADVANCE:
AT DOOR:
ADVANCE:
AT DOOR:
ADVANCE:
AT DOOR:
ADVANCE:
AT DOOR:
ADVANCE:
AT DOOR:
• •* PLEASE NOTE
GUEST POLICY •** NO GUEST TICKETS WILL BE SOLD ON THE
DAY OF THE EVENT. GUEST TICKETS MUST
BE PURCHASED IN ADVANCE AT THE UNION
INFORMATION DESK. LAST DATE TO PURCHASE
ADVANCE TICKETS IS FRIDAY, MAY
18 BEFORE 4 P.M.
Advance Tickets on sale at Union Information
Desk. T-Shirts on sale at Union Information
desk. UW-Parkside and age ID required at the
door.
RANGER
Parkside Union Advisory Board
recommends new alcohol policies
PUAB (the Parkside Union Advisory
Board) has been meeting
since early last semester to come
up with recommendations on how
die Parkside Union should address
potential problems when the state's
drinking age raises to 19 on July 1.
Problems are foreseeable next
year because one-third of th e Parkside
student body is comprised of
freshmen, most of whom are 18
years old.
PUAB has been discussing whatif
anything-in the current Union
operating procedures should be
changed in order to comply with
the new la w when it takes effect.
PUAB consists of 12 members-
19 voting and 2 non-voting-from organizations
throughout the campus.
The voting members include seven
students (from the four major organizations,
SOC and two elected at
large), two faculty representatives
and one alumni representative. The
two non-voting me mbers are Union
Director Bill Niebuhr and Coordinator
of Student Activities Buddy
Couvion.
The students currently on PUAB
are Mark Schlozen (PAB), Suzanne
Moles (Peer Support), Dave Higgens
(PSGA), Ken Meyer (Ranger),
Jack Kemper (SOC), and Chuck
Beta and Bruce Preston (at large).
Florence Shipek fills one of the faculty
seats while the other is vacant.
Tom Krimmel represents the alumni.
At last week's meeting, PUAB
members reviewed the recommendations
that they will forward to
Assistant Chancellor Carla Stoffle.
If Stoffle approves the recommendations,
they will take effect next
semester. If she disagrees with
something in the package, she,
PUAB members and Chancellor
Alan Gusltin will work out a compromise.
The following is PUAB's first
draft of their many recommendations,
along with the rationale for
them. The total package's wording
will be rewritten slightly over the
next week, but the major essence
will rema in the same.
ed that word might spread that
UW-Parkside will be an easy place
for 18 year olds to get into.
2. Recommendation:
The Parkside Union office
would supply all alcoholic beverage
sales areas with a daily listing of
events (from the computerized
reservations system) that would be
bringing the general public to campus
to aid bartenders in deciding
whom to provide service to. An
amendment was offered stating
that PUAB realizes the public will
be drawn to campus for certain activities
and the public should have
access to concession services. The
presence of s uch a list of a ctivities
would only be used if "questionable"
people were requesting service.
Rationale:
The above recommendation involves
assisting the bartender in determining
whether a potential customer
has business or a real purpose
to be on campus. Discretion
would be used as to when someone
would be questioned in regard to
that purpose. In that the Union's alcohol
serving areas are not generally
open as public bars, objectionable
outsiders could more easily be
denied service with the use of such
a list.
3. Recommendation:
The Parkside Union Advisory
Board supports the position that all
students should have equal access
to all regular, day-to-day operation
areas of the Union buildin*including
those involved in the sale of alcoholic
beverage products. It also
recognizes that appropriate procedures
need to be adopted to see
that underage patrons of t he Union
not be served or otherwise receive
those products.
where alcoholic beverages are
served, be open to any Parkside
student regardless of age, but that
all guests must be of legal drinking
age.
Rationale:
Because Parkside students pay
segregated fees supporting student
activities and student groups, they
should be elibible to attend recognized
student organization sponsored
events. However, underage
guests who have no tie to the University
and are not contributing
support to these events with tuition
dollars have no special right to be
admitted to events where alcohol is
being served.
6. Recommendation:
That at non-student organization
sponsored events where alcohol
is to be served, the Union is to
be responsible for making decisions
on a case-by-case basis that appropriate
measures are taken to see
state drinking laws are being followed.
Rationale:
Because events do vary i n nature,
one single policy cannot be
adopted to cover all situations.
Given the Union is involved in most
campus event reservations, knows
the types of groups associated with
them and what services are being
requested, it is in the best position
to evaluate what procedures need
to be followed for any particular
event.
7. Recommendation:
PUAB recommends in the
daily Union S quare bar operations
that beer currently served in 12 oz.
and 20 oz. containers, and wine in
5 Vz oz . containers, but pitchers, carafes
and Vz carafes be eliminated.
9. Recommendation:
In the day-to-day operation of
areas of the Union involved in ser ving
alcoholic beverages, student
bartenders be given discretion in
deciding when to or when not to ID
customers based on their positive
knowledge of the customer's age.
Anytime that absolute knowledge
does not exist that the customer is
19 or older, age identification must
be required and service only rendered
upon verification of age.
Rationale:
The rationale behind the above
recommendation is based on the
feeling that it is unnecessary to ID
all customers for each purchase if
positive knowledge of their being
over 18 ousts. This method of operation
will contribute to faster service
and less congestion at the bar,
as well as help to keep customers
from becoming upset with being
ID'd when not needed. It will aid in
supporting positive customer relations
versus the possibility of losing
customers due to a mode of service
not used elsewhere.
10. Recommendation:
Plastic wrist bands be adopted,
at least on an experimental one
year basis, as the acceptable means
of identification of those who will
be eligible to be served alcoholic
beverage at open events where such
are present. PUAB requests that
the funding for this first year's
wrist bands come from New Program
Development dollars, and
that if cont inued, the Union budget
for them in subsequent years as a
cost of op eration.
Rationale:
The rationale behind using
, wrist bands is that, although not
tamperproof, they probably represent
the best method of providing
the greatest control for bartenders
to identify those who can be legally
served. Also, because the Union hasnot
budgeted this unplanned expense,
and because it is an experiment
in handling a new problem, the one
time expenditure out of New Program
Development dollars seems
reasonable and would not further
burden the Union's established
operating budget.
11. Recommendation:
That the "drop-off" service
section of the campus' present alcohol
use policies be followed as stated.
12. Recommendation:
Present bar operating hours
for day-to-day service be maintained.
They are:
Union Square-Monday thru
Thursday, 11:00 a m to 10:30 pm;
Friday, 11:00 am to 6:30 pm.
Recreation Center-Monday thru
Thursday, 11:00 am to 9:30 pm;
Friday, 11:00 am to 11:30 pm; Saturday,
12:00 noon to 11:30 pm and
Sunday 12:00 noon t o 9:30 pm.
Rationale:
The rationale in keeping
present hours is based on serving
the diverse campus population of
UW-Parkside. With people of different
ages being on campus at different
hours, it is more important
tokeep a fairly broad range of service
hours to our campus than it
might be to a resident campus serving
mostly one type of student.
Week at the Park
1. Recommendation:
The Parkside Union was created
for and is intended to be used by
the UW-Parkside campus community
(students, faculty, staff and
alumni) and their immediate
guests; and when deemed appropriate,
also the public in general for
special public events. Those not falling
into such category or having
specific reason to be within University
premises may be denied the
Union's facilities, products and
services.
Rationale:
The thinking behind this motion
was to articulate the Union's
position in not having to serve "undesirables"
coming into the Union
from the community, and in not allowing
18 year olds who are not students
access to areas serving alcoholic
products. It is being speculat-
4. Recommendation:
That groups booking Union o r
other campus facilities for their
events be given the option of having:
A dry event-where no alcoholic
beverages would be served and all
ages welcome.
An open event with alcoholic
beverage service where all students
are welcome, but only those 19 and
over are eligible to be served alcoholic
beverages.
A 19 a nd over event-where alcoholic
beverages would be served
but those under legal drinking age
not eligible to attend.
Rationale:
The rationale for the above
recommendation is that sponsoring
groups should maintain the right to
edtermine their own program format
and who the event is for. It
should not be determined for them
through Parkside Union-based
policy. After little discussion, this
rationale was carried unanimously.
5. Recommendation:
That at the option of the sponsor,
student orgainzation events
Rationale:
The Parkside Union Advisory
Board recognized that reducing
container serving portions of beer
and wine should discourage the
sharing of product with those not
able to purchase due to being under
legal drinking age. At the same
time, PUAB feels it is still advisable
to offer a variety of sizes of
beer in order to: 1) red uce possible
congestion problems at the point of
purchase and 2) minimize revenue
loss created by customer dissatisfaction
with the Union's service format.
8. Recommendation:
PUAB recommends that any
person of legal drin king age be permitted
to purchase only one alcoholic
beverage per trip to the bar.
Rationale:
The unanimously passed rationale
behind the above recommendation
was that by not being
able to purchase multiple numbers
of glasses of beer or wine, sharing
by legal-aged patrons with those
under age would be discouraged
and reduced.
by John Kovatic
Feature Editor
Well, kids, this is it. Never let
Luehr or Stougaard say I never
wrote 'Week at the Park.' And boy,
what a week this looks like it's
gonna be. So if you can just hold
onto your little tushes long enough
to strap yourself into the chair,
we'll get things rolling right along.
Thursday, May 10
That's right, today. And seeing as
how PAB are all getting ready for
'The End,' today's schedule consists
of a lecture by Prof. Lillian
Trager.
"From Yams to Beer in a Nigerian
City," is the intriguing title of
the lecture itself, and it will be
given at 2 p.m. in Molinaro 111.
The program is free and open to
the public.
Friday, May 11
Apart from the start of finals, today's
main attraction is a concert in
the Communication Arts Theater
featuring the Parkside Orchestra
and Chorale.
The concert starts at 8 p.m. and
admission is $1 for students, faculty
and staff, $2 for others. Tickets
may be bought at the door, and
proceeds will benefit the Parkside
Music Scholarship fund.
. Wednesday, May 26
"Surviving the Learning Process
of Starting a Business," is the title
of a workshop at 7 p.m. in Union
104. Fo r all those of you who wish
to attend, call 553-2047 fof more details.
Friday, May 18
Today at 7 p.m., the Union
Square bar will close for good for
this semester.
What all the brochures don't tell
you, however, is that this will in effect
be the last chance you ever get
of ordering a pitcher of beer or a
carafe of wine, since somewhat
inane alcohol policies are due to be
enforced next semester. So, what
the hey! Finals are over, the beer is
cheap. Let's all say farewell to the
pitcher at Parkside with Style. 4£m
Afterwards we can all crash out
at the Chancellor's.
Saturday-Sunday, May 19-20
What ca n I say that hasn't already
been said? It's The End, and
boy are you guys going to have a
blast. This is a two-day, don't-miss
epic that you have just got to be at.
12 Thursday, May 10,1984 RANGER
Ask Dr. Bill
The doctor takes a leave
by Bill St ougaard
winner of the coveted Oswald
And now the end is near, do-wah,
do-wah. Yes indeedy folks, this
wonderful year is coming to a
close. This is my last batch of letters
for the '83-'84 season. As of
now, you're on your own. Goodluck
and may the force be with you.
AND NOW, THE LETTERS!
Dear Dr. Bill,
I would like to ask the panel
what you would do if you were Hitler.
Signed,
Curious
Dear Curious,
I think that the first thing that I
would do would be to get rid of al l
designer jeans commercials. Thai I
would pass a law that would prohibit
the use of the letter "G". I
would make it illegal to be a chemistry
professor. Boy this is fun. I
would open up diplomatic relations
with Disneyland, I would get rid of
elevator music, I would give baby
seals the right to vote, I would
cancel 'Happy Days', I would reenact
the Boston Tea Party, but I
would make all the people wear
costumes from Shakespeare's Hamlet.
I would have Ed McMabon and
Woodsy Owl get married, and I
would have PSGA Vice-President
Paul Johnson's gavel destroyed.
Dear Dr. Bill,
Get a hair cut.
Signed,
Mom
Dear Dr. Bill,
So you won an Oswald hu h? I bet
you think you're really hot guano,
eh? You and your flaming big-deal
cheese-headed stupid award thingy.
I got news for you Dr. Bill, you
suck cesspool water.
Signed,
a certain sports editor
Dear A.C.S.E.
My word! Aren't we testy today?
It looks like we've got ourselves a
teeny problem here. If you want to
be juvenile go ahead. I've got an
OSWALD nyah..nyah..nyah !
Dear Dr. Bill,
We know your type. We don't
like it. Lissen, we got a nice neighborhood
here, and our land values
is real high, like, if you get our
meaning.
So, lessen you want mebbe two
or three broken legs, scram, scum.
We hate your kind, mud-dwellerscuzz-
fairy, slime ball.
Signed
the Men
P.S. Is it better to serve fingerbowls
s cented with lemon or lime
when entertaining a lady friend?
Dear Men,
I've just thought of a couple
more things I would do if I were
Hitler.
Dear Dr. Bill,
Did you get my le tter?
Signed
Waiting
Dear Waiting,
Yeah! It was really stupid and
I'm not going to print it.
FAMILY FUN
AT THE END
PARKSIDE UNION REC CENTER
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Ranger photo by Dave McEvoy
Dear Dr. Bill
I've got one hell of a problem
here. My g irlfriend and I want to
get married. The problem is that
we don't think sex will be any fun if
we are legal. We think sex is only
good if it is cheap and meaningless
and illicit. How can we get married
and have sleazy sex as well?
Signed,
Cold Showers
Won't Do It
Dear Cold,
I think that a good idea would be
to buy my latest self-help manual,
"Keep the X in Sex." TTiis ha ndy
little guide will keep that nasty element
in your drab, boring lives.
Send $49.95 to:
"Ask Dr. Bill, c/o the Ranger"
Dear Dr. BUI,
Can you help me out? I'm trying
to find the following items: a cat o'
nine tails, chains, a Black and
Decker belt sander, several live
scorpions, an iron maiden, thumb
screws, a cattle prod, some isolated
herpes simplex virus and some
chicken bones. You see, I need
them soon. My family reunion is
only a week away.
Signed,
Entertaining
Dear Entertaining,
Just send $4.95 to me, and I'll
send you my booklet, "Where to
Find a Cat o' Nine Tails, Chains, a
Black and Decker Belt Sander, Several
Live Scorpions, an Iron
Maiden, Thumb Screws, a Cattle
Prod, Some Isolated Herpes Simplex
Virus and some Chicken
Bones."
Dear Dr. BUI,
I m an editor at a college newspaper.
I'm having a hard time getting
enough sleep because I'm constantly
pining away about the fact
that I didn't win a coveted Oswald
My friends say to me, "C'mon!
Master your grief!" but it doesn't
help. How can I live with myself? I
really wanted an Oswald. Why
don't I kiU myself? HOW DO YOU
RATE?
Signed,
Ticked
Dear Ticked,
It really bothers you that much?
I love it! This is great! HA, HA,
HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA,HA, HA
HA, HA! !!! . . .
RANGER ,13 Thursday, May 10,1984
Once again it's... So It Goes
THE END S by Nick Thome
winner of the coveted Oswald
Hi, folks, fans (both of you), and
furry little mutant scum balls who
read this rag when some highly
educated college student drops it
on the floor opened to this page.
How th e hell are you doing?
This is the last copy of the
Ranger for this year, so I decided
to let you know what has happened
with some of the stories I was responsible
for writing.
As both my loyal fans will attest,
I haven't been getting much printed
lately. That's because my Editor,
John "He won't print anything that
isn't his" Kovalic, has deemed my
work to be less important than anything
anyone else writes. Well,
enough of the griping, on to the
heart of the matters at hand.
Some people asked me when the
new shopping mall will open here.
The answer is never. The corporation
that was going to do the renovation
work decided Parkside was
in a te rrible location. The president
of the Coalition Corporation of
America was quoted as saying,
"That Parkside location sucks. It's
too far from Racine and Kenosha
to be of any use at all. In fact about
the only thing I could turn that
hovel int o would be a medium security
prison. Maybe I should look
into that."
When Chancellor Guskin was informed
about the Corporation's
pullout of the mall project, he was
displeased. His business, Big Al's
Overlook Lounge and Deli, was almost
ready to open when the bad
news was first heard. The chanceldor
was heard saying, "Wow! What
a bummer! I just had the stage put
in for strippers and everything."
As for the corporate character assassinations,
they are still occurring.
Assassins have expanded their
target list to include animated corporate
symbols and animals. Since I
first reported the deaths of the Pillsbury
Dough Boy, the Snuggle Bear
and the Banner toilet paper roll,
four more corporate symbols have
bit the big one.
The first one to buy the farm was
the Helping Hand from Hamburger
Helper. While on the set for the last
time, a terrorist snuck up behind
the unsuspecting appendage and
threw him in the frying pan with
half a pound of ground beef. The
next character died in an equally
disgusting way. To the Tidy Bowl
man it was just another tank, another
commercial, another huge
pay check, but it was also his demise.
Some clever terrorist had
lined the tank with magnectic
mines the night previous. All that
was left was the little guy's hat.
The Hamms Bear was touring
the brewery in Washington state
when these godless assassins
struck. They took him to the top of
the brewery and threw him in a vat
of Ham ms Light. The bear attempted
to drink his way out, but he was
three hundred gallons short. Officials
from the brewery said, "We
are sad our symbol won't be able to
advertise for us anymore, but there
is one good thing that came of the
tragedy. The bear gave the vat he
was thrown in a very unique flavor.
We sav ed the beer he drowned in
and we are going to market it in
one-time-only cans called Hamms
Very Special Light Bear Beer. It
should be a hit."
The most recent murder was
Morris the Cat. The cat killers
broke into Morris' house and forced
him to eat 900 bags of T ender Vittles.
Then they fed him three boxes
of Alka Seltze r and made him drink
a 16-ounce Coke. Morris was found
the next day by his maid. The maid
was heard to say, "It was horrible,
disgusting and very difficult to
clean up. Why didn't they shoot
him? Or maybe they chould have
tossed him in the microwave on
high, but no! They had to feed him
all that food and blow him u p like a
God blessed balloon! Yuk!"
This school year I wrote a few articles
about the school's idiotic policies
regarding alcohol on campus
and corporate sponsorship. The
truth is that there is nothing we can
do to stop the elimination of pitchers
and carafes. They are history as
of the end of the semester.
Here's some more good news for
you all. Next year it will be one
drink per person. You won't be
able to send one person to buy beer
for all the people at your table. If
you want to buy a round, you have
to bring the people you wish to buy
for with you to the coulter. However,
this is only phase one.
A l ittle known plan to require a
Union official to hold your hand
while you drink your beer may be
instituted next semester.
Since this is my last article, I will
end it by answering some questions
posed to me this school year.
Q. Is that your only pair of
shoes?
A. No, I have another pair that is
worse.
Q. Why don't you throw that
backpack away?
A. Last semester while riding
home on my ten speed that
$%•%$% backpack lost a strap.
The result was it swing sharply towards
the left side of my bike. It
was raining out and the sudden
shift in weight caused me to fall
face first into the nice soft gravel
that the bike trail is made of. From
that day, I have been making that
backpack pay for its indiscretion.
Q. Did anyone respond to the
classified ad you pla ced for women
with high expectations and low
moral values?
A. Three phone calls were received
at the Ranger office in response
to my ad. However, two were
prank calls and I wasn't in the office
when the legitimate call came
• i n . ' v ' . V . VWW. 'WW. ' . *
I spent the better part of my weekend glued to the
tube and running through several back-issues of The
Atlantic, Harpers and Vanity Fair. Again doped to thegills
on caffeine and with this week's deadline looming
ominously near, I noted a little section near the front
of the lately-resurrected latter magazine entitled
'Thumbs up, Thumbs down.'
Those of you who are real quick will by now have
realized that this is Vanity Fair's 'review' section, encompasing
roughly 12 pages, dedicated to the fine arts.
Skimming through reviews of French cinema, various
dance companies, and theater, Beethoven Sonatas,
the Amsterdam School of Dutch expressionist architecture
and Mahler's Das Lied Der Er de, I unsuspectingly
came across a photograph of Van Halen's David Le
Roth. Aparently Vanity Fair regularly gives up half a
page or so of i ts hallowed space to a review section entitled
'Pop Culture.'
As n either Van Halen, nor 'pop culture' are what I
would normally describe as 'fine art,' I decided to take
a closer gander, trying desperately to avoid gagging.
Let's admit it. 'Rolling Stone' Vanity Fair ain't.
Phrases like "Eddie Van Halen's pointillistie guitar
style" and "Angus Young's (AC/DC) abstract expressionist
sheet of sound" leapt at me with the force of a
sledge hammer. Finally admitting that what's important
is something termed a band's "Head-banging quotient,"
Vanity Fair gave thumbs up to AC/DC ("the
consummate heavy metal band"), Def Leppard, Judas
Priest, Quiet Riot and Van Halen. 'Thumbs-down'
went to Kiss, Ozzy Osb ourne and Motly Crue.
It's good to see they're so discerning.
••••••
The world today mourns the loss of one of the greatest
existential philosophers since Jean Paul Satre.
The sudden death of Waldo 'Fruitcake' Nernst, most
brilliant student of Fredrich Goatbender, will not soon
be forgotten. The name of Nerst will become a household
word as his theories are disseminated amongst the
intelligensia and the full impact of his special theory of
cool-whip slowly is realized.
Born Francis Cerebellum Rovenscrotch, Nernst
realized at an early age that a Rovenscrotch would
never be accepted into a restricted country club, and
quickly changed his name to Scigowitze. He later
adopted his childhood nick-name of 'Scum-Bucket,' in
by
John
Kovalic
an attempt to deny his Lithuanian heritage, but soon
chose Nernst after flirting briefly with the names Skrunge,
Blatwurst and 'Hey, you!'
••••••
My main problem with communication Majors:
Their justification for having a major in communication
is that we need to communicate to survive. Strikes
me the same goes for certain bodily functions, but that
doesn't mean we have to form a major around them.
••••••
On t he New Alcohol Pol icies:
I really don't mind Chancelor Guskin acting like he's
my parent as long as I can borrow his car for Saturday
night.
••••••
Well, this is it. My las t Ranger as Feature Editor.
It's been a fun couple of semesters here. And the
year before that was pretty neat also.
Without wishing to get too maudlin, I'd like to thank
Sarah, Bill, Rick, Dick, and Nick and all the rest of t he
people who wrote for features over the year. One day I
may even meet my mysterious music correspondent
Jeff Leisgang. The staff this year gave the section its
own peculiar flavor.
Special thanks to A1 Guskin. If ever a target was
needed, we could always use him for cheap pot-shots.
Thanks, Al. But I still think your alcohol policy sort of
sucks.
So, farewell. When next you hear of me, I will be the
Ranger's special correspondant in Madison. That's
right. After two years at Parkside, I'm going to a real
university.
Have a great summer, and I hope you all get through
finals OK.
So it goes.
Q. Do you have anything to say
for yourself, Nick?
A. I wasn't there at the time.
That's about all for now,
campers. Have a good summer.
Good luck on the finals. I will se e
you at The End. Whoever called in
response to my ad, try again Friday
at noon. 'Til then, I am, as always,
Nick
Let your love shine
on Mother's Day.
Merlin Olsen
from s 18 and up
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14 Thursday, May 10,1984 RANGER
Brhel enjoys challenge of theater
by Sarah Uhlig
winner of the coveted Oswald
Andy Brhel played the lead role
in Molier's "The Miser" which
played at Parkside over past two
weekends. As Harpagon, The Miser
of t he title, he played the role with
much conviction.
Regular theater goers will also
remember Brhel's other roles over
the last few years, which added
sparks of brilliance to the talented
Parkside productions.
Brhel's interest in acting began
when he was a junior in high
school. "I saw the musical the
school put on all three times and I
felt guilty because I realized,
watching it, that there was a lot
that I could have contributed to it.
I knew that I could act as well as
anybody up there, just from the
fact that I could read aloud better
than most of them could act."
He then decided to audition for
Pygamalion, the play by George
Bernard Shaw that was turned into
the musical "My Fair Lady," and
got a lot of experience from the
'bit' parts he played.
After the next musical, Kiss Me
Kate, another 'transformed' classic
based on Shakepeare's "Taming of
the Shrew," in which he had the
lead role, he knew he was going to
pursue an acting career. "I just
realized that I would rather do that
(act) more than anything else.
There was nothing else I really
thought I could do and be happy
with."
Brhel is 21 a nd has been attending
Parkside for eight semesters.
He chose Parkside for many reasons.
"I didn't have the money to
go to a private school, so I had to
go to a state school. The nearest
was UW-M as I lived in Cudahy, but
the acting program had recently
changed over to a very graduate-accented
one. If y ou're an undergraduate
at UW-M, you simply do not
get on stage.
"The best teacher really is experience
and I knew 1 wanted to get
on stage. The next closest school
was Parkside...I knew that I liked
the campus and that Parkside was
a fairly small school. In a small
school you have that much better
chance of getting on stage."
At Parkside, Brhel's roles have
usually been either lead or key
roles in the plays he has been in.
He has played a variety of roles,
playing a pair of twins in "Ring
round the Moon," a frustrated
author in "I Am A Camera" and
the comic, money-grubbing Harpagon
in the latest Parkside Main
Stage production.
The role he would most like to
play is Hamlet. "I always used to
get amused by every actor in the
world saying that he wanted to play
Hamlet.. Once I had read the play
and found out how similar I like to Andrew Brhel
think that I am to Hamlet, I wanted
to play him. It's certainly one of
Shakespeare's harder roles. He
(Hamlet) is a young man. Some
people say he's the most intelligent
character in literature."
One of the main attractions, for
Brhel, is the challenge.
In the future, Brhel hopes to act
on stage rather in movies. "The
style of acting is much different
than that of plays. The returns on
stage are very immediate and very
gratifying. I would prefer being on
stage."
Parents face responsibility
Over 50 percent of Parkside's
students fall in the category "older
than average." For many of you
that means balancing the responsibilities
of being a student, a parent
and sometimes an employee. Much
of the year that is difficult, but with
children out of sc hool for the summer
it becomes almost impossible.
One way student/parents adjust
is by ta king courses on a part-time
basis. One sure outcome, though, is
that the number of years needed to
graduate increases. To limit those
years as much as possible means
taking courses during summer
school.
For many parents, the demand
to be home more or provide more
activities for their kids increases
during the summer. Kids want or
need swimming lessons or other
day camp experiences. They want
more time with their parents.
The Wellness Grant has developed
a number of ways of integrating
parents' needs and kids' needs
during the summer. If you have
children ages two weeks to teenage,
and this dilemma is one you
face, call Mary Bassis, ext. 2366, or
Maureen Budowle, ext. 2227, or
visit the Student Health Center,
Molinaro D115. Mallory raps his poetry to music
by Rick Luehr
It's like a l ate to bed, a late to rise,
And when you wake up in the
morning you got red eyes,
You got to work, you look like a
jerk
Because the boss is waiting for you
with an angry smirk,
He s&ys you' re fired, not to be rehired,
Because the man is j ust so sick and
tired,
Of you coming late, you're leaving
early,
Don't you realize the man can always
surely
Replace you, then what would you
do,
You'll stand on the corner till your
life is through,
Or you'll waste your time or commit
a crime,
Just to bite, scratch, scrape a penny
or a dime,
Because the streets are cold, the
streets are dead,
You got to go to school to get
ahead,
In this age of technology and computers,
Stay away from crime and drug
abusers,
Because life moves fast, it won't
get slower,
And using your head is the way to
get over.
This is some of the rap of Brian
Mallory.
For those of you who aren't sure
exactly what rap is, it is bascially
poetry set to the beat of music, usually
up tempo. "But," says Mallory,
"those who rap are getting out of
the up tempo swing and getting
into more slowdown jazz."
Mallory, a 19 year old Parkside
freshman from Waterbury, Connecticut,
became interested in rapping
at the age of sixteen. "I got
started became a couple of f riends
and I went to New York and we
saw a couple of guys doing it. It
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was a kind of a way to get popular,
everybody had a lot of people surrounding
them when they were rapping.
And I said, 'Wow, that's pretty
good how t hey can attract people
to hear them rap like that.' So,
three friends and I got started and
we called ourselves The Chill Out
Bunch."
Mallory looks at rapping as a fun
hobby, "but if I ever get a chance
to be recorded, I'd jump at it. Our
group hasn't been together since
September, but if we were to get
together again, I think we could
really make a good record."
Rap stems from various sources,
said Mallory. "Most rappers ad lib
their raps, kind of impromptu.
They can just rap at you without
any preparation. My ra pping stems
from my poetry. When I write a
poem, if I think I can set it to the
beat of the music, then I can make
a rap out of i t."
Mallory has been writing poetry
since the third grade when one of
his teachers read some of his work
and encouraged him to keep writing.
He feels that his poetry and
rapping go together for him." I'm a
quiet person, and rapping helps me
to express myself and to tell about
things that are going on in the
world. I talk about a lot of social
problems when I'm rapping.
"Melly-Mel of Grandmaster
Flash and the Furious Five said it
best, 'Rapping is now becoming a
form of str eet poetry.' A lot of r apping
today talks about street life,
about drugs, about a lot of things
that go on. Now there's a rap about
Jesse Jackson, there's raps about
Reagan. Rapping is fun to do, but
when you take rapping seriously,
you've got to talk about things besides
going to parties, getting
drunk, etc. It's better to talk about
a good ,subjpct. Thafs what I like to
do," he said. * 1
Once Ober Easy
15 Thursday, May 10,1984
Time to say goodbye Periodicals: How
form is a bitch.
true. But re- SCENE:
Table:
The Goskin Breakfast
by Dick Oberbruner
winner of the coveted Oswald
The Time-of-Day Lady over the
telephone is a real woman confined
to a buoy floating in Lake Michigan.
Next time you call, listen for
the waves rocking the background
and how unsure she sounds when
speaking.
This unfortunate person is stuck
at a dead end job, so have pity
when she utters in a chilled voice:
"Courtesy of your telephone company..."
She doesn't have time to
talk, only a few moments to mention
the time and temperature. A
seasick woman with a phone, a digital
clock and a thermometer.
She tells it like it is: a moment in
time with no hype. Sure, there's a
plug for the telephone company,
but who isn't forced to patronize
the boss one in a while?
Give her a call and give a listen.
If she's not too responsive, remember,
it's very cold on the lake.
'Oswald' Night
steals banquet's
limelight by John Kovalic
winner (finally) of
the coveted Oswald
Once again the Student Awards
Banquet was overshadowed by the
glory of "Oswald Night."
The coveted Oswald, Parkside's
equivalent of the lesser-known
Oscar, probably marks the pinnacle
of a Ranger F eature Writer's career
at Parkside and for the many who
come away empty-handed on Oswald
night, the feeling is one of bitter
disappointment.
"I'm pissed," Ranger sports editor
Patricia Cumbie was reported
to have said. "I did 'Week at the
Park.' I did play reviews, and I'm a
good friend of John Kovalic."
Kovalic, who likes to be known
only as "The Academy" in the
weeks leading to the ceremony, is
responsible for selecting those
lucky few from the feature staff of
the Ranger to receive the coveted
award.
This year's winners included
Sarah Uhlig (Ace Reporter of the
Year); Rick Luehr, Dick Oberbruner
and Nick Thome (The Nick Dick
Rick Columnist of the Year
Award); 'Dr. Bill' Stougaard (The
Abigail Van Buren Malpractice
Award) and Chancellor Alan E.
G us kin (The 'Welcome to Miller
Time' Athelete of the Week
Award.)
"Well, I'll tell you," said Stougaard,
clutching his coveted Oswald
to his chest, "I'm really excited
about it. This is a real honor. Too
bad the award had to be tainted by
giving one to Thome.
"It's long overdue. I'm just glad
that the overwhelming public pressure
made Kovalic change his
tune," he added.
Dick Oberbruner, co-winner of
the Nick Dick Rick Award, was
equally surprised.
"I deserved a coveted Oswald,"
he said, in a fit ofmodesty the likes
of which the world may never see
until the second coming. "This entire
semester was geared towards an
award-winning ending.
"My coveted Oswald stands tall
on my window sill above the sink,
though I have had to (lust it already,
"he added quickly.
"As to tri-winners, rhyming is no
basis for celery-headed journalism.
I stand out like my coveted Oswald,
so please pass th e Lemon Pledge."
Nick Thome, another co-winner,
was reported to have sad, "Like
wow, man, I can't believe I won a
coveted Oswald.
"After years of striving for perfection,
I have achieved it. I don't
know what to do now. I think I'll
climb a tall building and impale
myself on a fire hydrant. Now that
I have got my Oswald, I have nothing
to live for."
Rick Luehr, on the other hand,
was quick with praise and generous
to a fault. "It's about $%*•&$*%
time!! I'm still made that I have to
share this sucker with those hacks
Thome and Oberbruner."
Luehr, who also referred to his
co-winners as "purveyors of the literary
twinkie," said, "This is so insulting
I think I'll slash my wrists."
Thome, who was within earshot
of Luehr's comments, added to his
quote before leaping at Luehr with
a large blunt object.
"Rick sure has a lot of nerve calling
me a hack. Him calling me and
Dick a couple of hacks is like John
Wayne Gacy calling Chuck Mansona
murderer. He hasn't written
an original article in years."
In a surprise ceremony held in
the local A&W, The Academy also
awarded a special coveted Oswald
to John Kovalic himself.
"Hell, I didn't want to be left out
of it. Anyway, I'm such a neat guy
with excellent ideas and all that,
well, I think you get the point."
Kovalic awarded hmself the
Demigod of the Year Award. (The
main Editor's wishes were disregarded.)
As Oswald night drew to a close,
muffled sobs could be heard from
the direction of Andy 'Pops' Buchanan,
Ranger's Business Manager,
who had failed to win a coveted
Oswald for the fifth year running.
"I've never been so happy in all
my life," he sobbed. .........
We all know about the Wisconsin
Dells. So what is a "dell?" Answer
in next issue.
• * * • * • • * • •
A scene from The Library Tragedy,
circa 508 BC.
Periodicals: My innards, they are
ripped!
Indexes: I, too, feel not quite
whole. Who are the scoundrels who
commit such atrocities?
Periodicals: Underclassmen!
They expore knowledge as a bulldozer
landscapes the garden.
Indexes: We must do something.
The washrooms have been shelled
by the eager hands of vandals.
What would spark such action?
Periodicals: The war at home:
make your bed and the like. They
seek an aggressive outlet.
Indexes: A rebellion under the
protection of accessibility.
Periodicals: Correct.
Indexes: But what of our brothers
and sisters among the shelves?
Periodicals: Protecting resources
is a contradiction in terms.
Indexes: And that cursed Graffiti:
a philosopher in the rancid ilk.
He must be banned, or alter his
content to intelligent perspectives.
••••••••••
55,000 residents have received
emission tests. So w atch what you
eat, or the Pedestrian Inspection
Commission will alter your diet to
conform to pollution standards.
••••••••••
A Student Meditation on a
Refrigerator
Full
Do not, Dear Roommate, dive
headfirst into the seemingly vast
array of groceries.
It is but an optical illusion to think
that we, two, can partake of it
immediately and have it,
somehow, multiply twice as we
crave for more.
Foodstuffs go quicker in
consumption than the mere
rotting of neglect.
Let us, then, enjoy the quality in
flavor of the comestibles we
share.
Rather than the quantity
we can put away.
For it will be Tuesday, and we shall
have vanquished our supply and
be forced to suck rocks
for nourishment.
Breakfast at the Chancellor's
Mr. Guskin: Why do you throw
your grapefruit rinds on the floor?
Are you angry with something?
Mrs. Guskin: They're for the
dog. I like to watch his lips pucker.
Mr. G.: Yes, but he has his own
food. We shouldn't spoil him.
Mrs. G.: Then why should we
have grapefruit? We're spoiled too.
Tell the maid to ship the crates
back to Florida.
Mr. G.: I certainly will not. We
have these new grapefruit spoons.
Let's not be costly. Now eat your
toast. It's getting cold.
Mrs. G.: They're already cold.
They were never toasted. You better
get a repairman to fix that
toaster before breakfast tomorrow.
Mr. G.: They fixed it once before.
I can't imagine what the problem
is.
Mrs. G.: Maybe they need a pay
raise. That oughtta toast the bread.
At least melt the butter a little.
Just look at this bread. Cold cereal
is warmer.
Mr. G.: Cold cereal is much easier
to deal with. One, pour cereal,
Two, pour milk. Add a spoon and
voila! instant breakfast. Toast, on
the other hand, has many preparations.
First, there is the-
Mre. G.: I know, I know. Please
don't be so analytical first thing in
the morning. You have the rest of
the day ahead of you.
MParkside SShhaakkeeddoowwnn
tSaturday, May 12 8 p.m. 'til close.
99* Strawberry and Regular
Margaritas
75* Tap Beers
50* Kamakazis and Root Beers
•••••MTU*****
Parkside and age I.D. required
JOIN US AT CHANCERY PUB
AND RESTAURANT
6430 Washington Ave.
Racine, Wl 53406
886-5600
RANGER
Psychobabble
Oswaldenlightened
by Rick Laehr
Winner of the Coveted Oswald
As I am sure all of you have
heard by now, I am one of the fortunate,
nay privileged persons honored
with the highest award in my
field.
This honor was bestowed on me
at the student awards banquet on
April 27, by t he one and only John
Kovalic.
Of c ourse, I am speaking of the
much ^coveted, highly desired, seldom
bestowed, Oswald.
Yes, I am one of a select few to
be given this highest token of journalistic
esteem. And it has turned
my life around.
Before the award, I was virtually
ignored in the halls of this great institute
of learning of which we are
all a part. Now that has all
changed. I cannot go 20 feet down
the corridor without being besieged
by autograph hounds and hangers
on. And my phone has been ringing
off the hook.
Offers of speaking engagements
and testimonial dinners have been
flowing in. And Ted Koppel just
won't leave me alone. He keeps
The Funny Paper Caper
MY FIRST CASE AFTER \ GOT OUT OF THE
HOSPITAL SOUNDED UKE A MUGGING
WHEN t HEARD THE FACTS—MAN LYING IN
AN ALLEY WITH A HAMBURGER BUN
STUFFED DOWN HIS THROAT, POCKETS EMPTY
llll
flVlE FACE RANG A BELL, BUT I
COULDN'T PLACE IT UNTIL S6T.
STRIPES FOUND THE MAWS WALLET
IN A DUMPSTER DOWN THE
by Paul Berge
RONZO GARBANZO*
I KNOW THI5 CLOWN'S NAfAE.
begging me to be on Nightline. I
have no time to myself anymore. I
am hounded day and night.
I can't take it! My life has become
a living hell! And it's all because
of you, Kovalic! You did this
to me! You couldn't leave me with
my blessed anonymity. No! You
had to screw it all up by giving me
that stupid award! Thanks loads,
buddy!
• • • * * * • * * *
This past Sunday, I experienced
one of the strangest events in my
life.
I went to a Brewers game with
the inimitable Parkside Association
of Com municators. Yes, one of the
most highly respected groups on
campus.
The tailgate party was heavily
BURGER KING
KING SAYS
GOOD
MORNING
IN A SPECIAL WAYJ
BREAKFAST
^ CROISSANTS What a delicious way to brighten up your day! Our new -
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Served Everyday from 6 AM-10:30 AM
Sundays from 7 AM-Noon
Breakfast Sandwiches
New! Croissant With:
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Sausage, Egg & Cheese..$1.29
Hamm, Egg & Cheese $1.29
Scrambled Egg Platter....$1.20'
W/Sausage Or Bacon ....41.60
4222 52nd St.,
Kenosha
French Toast $1.20
W/Saosage Or Bacon $1.60
Hash Browns 35(
Danish 50'
Croissant 50'
Orange Juice 50'
Hours: 6 AM-2:30 AM
Mon.-Sat.
7 AM-11 PM Sua.
bizzare. Music, dancing, drinking,
frisbees, drinking, food, drinking,
and to top it all off, drinking. Then
we went into the game. Well, most
of us d id. There were a few people,
who shall remain nameless, you
know who you are, you little
scamps, who didn't enter the stadium
until the ninth inning.
God only knows what they were
doing out in the parking lot for
eight innings, and He's not talking.
Anyway, it was an event to
remember.
I don't know what was more fun,
the game, the tailgate party, or the
getting stuck in County Stadium's
only elevator for twenty minutes
and making an enemy in the person
of the elevator operator. All in all,
it was something that I may never
forget. As har d as I may try.
* * * * * * * * * *
Seeing as how this is the last
column that I will write this semester,
I would like to mention some
very important people.
First, to Carol Kortendick, who
wrote a letter criticizing one of my
articles. No hard feelings Carol, I
mean, everyone is entitled to their
opinion, even if yours was wrong.
Next, to Carl Chernouski, thanks
for making my stuff look so good
by comparison.
Also, I would like to thank the
'Beaks' for confusing me no end. I
still say you do it with mirrors.
To Prof. Peter Martin: You
know all of those nasty things you
said all semester that I threatened
to print in the paper? Well I just
want to assure you that I haven't
forgotten them, I'm just saving
them until next year.
To Jennie: Good luck as editor.
P.S. I'm still willing to talk bribe.
To Joey, who always wanted me
to mention him in my column, I
just did.
Thanks to Patty, for just being
you.
A special thank you to the entire
Ranger staff.
Thanks to all of you out there
who read my articles and gave me
useful comments (both of you).
And last, but certainly least, to
John Kovalic, you can't fire me, I
quit.
Classifieds
Continued from Page 9
REEN: HAVE a great summer. I'll
miss you!! Joey.
JOHN KOVALIC: I'm gonna miss
you blind! Have a nice summer!
Joey.
DR. BILL: Have a great summer!
You're great! Joey.
DAVE: WHO'S going to feet
Phvhrt, Bettylou and Loretta over
the summer? Your fellow Divee.
BOOBY, BOBBY Bo Bobby, Banana
Wana wo-wobby, Fee-fi-fofobby.
Bobby!
ROBERT: CONGRATULATIONS
on your graduation. Love Lori.
HAPUfY BIRTHDAY, Jennifer
dearest. Your featured partner in
crime, J.K.
BIG JONZ at PARADISE NORTH
presents:
FULL HOUSE
(Top 40)
Friday, May 11
9:30 pm-1:30 pm
— AND —
Saturday, May 12
9:30 pm-1:30 am
NO COVER CHARGE
with UW-Parkside
I.D.
Wednesday, May 16
MAINSTREAM
Alabama Slammers 50* & S chnapps 50*
9:30 pm-10:30 pm
Tap Beer
632-0724
2915 Romayne Ave.
Off.RAPid* Dr.,
tjJlj J, onz
JOEY? WHAT will I do without
you all summer? Reen
KENT: I Can't wait until the end
of the semester!!! yes!!
PETER MARTIN: What was that
you said about the faculty? Watch
out for the Ranger expose next
semester. John K.
LARRY DUETSCH: looks kinda
like I won't be around to cut class
anymore. J.K.
KEN: WHAT can I say? Have a
great time and f-k the authority.
John.
RADIO RACHEL: Keep on rockin',
keep on rollin! See ya next year!!
Joey.
JOHN AND Kate and Patty and
Bob and Michael and Tony-look
out at Madison!
CATHERINE AND John - Hope
we'll still get to see you. We'll miss
those fun excursions with you. J
and J.
KEN AND Jill-may your love
bloom lik e the meadows and shine
like the stars!
STAFF 83-84 Big kisses to ya. It's
been fun. J.T.
FLASH: RESPIRATORY disease
hits Ranger office!! Phlegm at 11.
RANGER PEOPLE party with
"happy Jello" at county stadiumphlegm
at 11
PHVRHT, BETTY LOU and Loretta
can take care of themselvesthere's
all sorts o' critters running
around the tunnel.
PAT, CAT, J.K., Big Guy, Whit 'n
Herb: The Ranger finna miss all
y'all next year. O'McMacVanVonOvich,
owitz, d'sonsenski.
TO THE entire staff: thanks for
making my return a success. Big
Guy.
JENNIE: CONGRATS! You'll do a
good job-don't worry about it. Ken
DON'T FORGET Gus' birthday
party May 20. Wild time! Walk
there and fly away!
CALIFORNIA DREAMIN' once
again, eh Whit (h ope so!)
JILL: THANKS for everything. I
love you!
KEN? I love you, too! (FNE)
Heiring and Womeldorf honored
17 Thursday, May 10, 1984 •+
Parkside alumnus Jim Heiring,
who is a heavily favored hopeful for
the 1984 U.W. Olympic race-walking
team, will be inducted into the
NAIA Hall of Fame at a banquet on
Wednesday, May 23, at the University
of Charleston in West Virginia.
Heiring, a 1977 fine arts graduate
of Parkside and a Kenosha native,
is a six-time NAIA national racewalking
champion (three indoor
and three outdoor) and an eighttime
Ail-American in the two-mile
and 10-kilometer walks.
He is currently living at the
Olympic Training Center in Colorado
Springs, where he is training for
the Olympic Trials set for June. In
1980, Heiring made the U.S. Olympic
race-walking team by taking
first place in the 20-kilometer walk
in the Olympic Trials. The U.S.,
however, boycotted the 1980 Olympic
Games.
Heiring is heavily favored in the
upcoming Trials. He is considered
America's best in the 20-kilometer
walk, the shorter of two distances
contested in the Olympics.
Heiring becomes the fourth
Parkside athlete to be inducted into
the NAIA Hall of Fame. The others
are Lucian Rosa, track and field,
and wrestlers Bill West and Ken
Martin.
Earlier this year Heiring set a
world record while winning the
two-mile race walk at the U.S. Indoor
Championships in New York,
walking the distance in 12:11.21 to
break the old record of 12:13.3 3 set
by Ray Sharp, also a former Parkside
walker.
Last year he set the world indoor
record in the 1,500 meter walk and
in 1982 set the American record in
the 20-kilometer walk and was
named the United States Walker of
the Year.
A Bradford High School alumnus,
Heiring also will be inducted
into the newly-established Kenosha
Public Schools' Athletic Hall of
Fame on Saturday, May 5.
Spring fitness
St. Luke's run
Erik Womeldorf, a junior member
of Parkside's basketball team,
has been selected as a member of
the 1983-84 NAIA Academic All-
Emphasizing family, fun and fitness,
the 1984 S t. Luke's Blue and
Gold Lakeshore Family Run will
take walkers and runners on a course
through the hospital's beautiful
lakeshore neighborhood.
This year's run/walk will be held
on Saturday, May 12 at 8:30 a.m. in
observance of National Hospital
Week. The scenic route begins at
Gateway Technical Institute's lakeshore
parking lot at 11th Street
and finishes at East Park in front
of G ateway.
A five-mi le walk has been added
this year on the course, which includes
the picturesque DeKoven
Foundation along its route.
Also new are the comfortable
M.A.S.H.-like blue surgical scrub
tops guaranteed to all runners and
walkers who pre-register before
May 9. Registrations will be accepted
until 6 p.m. May 11 at the
St. Luke's main lobby.
Fees are 87 for adults; $4 for
children 11 and under.
Entry forms and waivers are
available at St. Luke's lobby, the
Auxiliary Gift Shop, sporting goods
stores, schools, health centers and
public libraries.
The Blue and Gold Lakeshore
Family Run will include a two-mile
run and walk, a five-mile run and
walk, a wheelchair division and
categories for all ages. Trophies are
given t o first place winners in each
category; ribbon awards are
presented to second and third place
runners and walkers.
Categories for race-walkers are
not s cheduled because of the limited
number of participants. v
In addition to encouraging all serious
runners to compete in Racine's
first spring running event, St.
Luke's run/walk organizers added
the longer five-mile course for the
brisk-paced walkers in the area.
The two-mile walk attracts others
with more limited stamina.
"Walking briskly is a highly recommended
form of exercise that
actively involves hundreds of people
in this area. Giving awards for
walkers as well as runners in our
unique family wellness event acknowledges
the value of this
healthy and fun form of physical
activity," said Luan Wells. St.
Luke's Community Services coor- -
dinator.
For more information, call 636-
2790 or 636-2810 during regular
weekday business hours.
Vet's Run
The second annual five-mile
"Fun Run," sponsored by Parkside's
student Veterans' Organization,
will be at 9 a.m. on Saturday,
May 19, starting under the bridge
linking Molinaro Hall and the
Union Building over Inner Loop
Road.
Entry in the run is 86 in advance
adn 87 the day of the event. Advance
registration deadline is Friday,
May 11. Cost includes a "Vets'
Fun Run" T-shirt, and two passes
for beverages.
Proceeds of the event will go to
the Muscular Dystrophy Association,
the Disabled Veterans of
American organization, the Parkside
Child Care Center, and Parkside
Vets' Organization.
Registration forms are available
at the Parkside Union Information
Center and at sports shops and
health spas in Kenosha, Racine and
Milwaukee.
The top three runners in both the
men's and women's (age 19 and
older) divisions will be awarded
trophies. The top two finishers in
the youth (15 to 18) and children's
division (14 and under) will receive
medals.
For more information call the
Parkside Veterans' Services office
at 553-2296 or Vets' Organization
president Rich Welbon at 554-1866
at 5 p.m.
American Basketball Team.
Womeldorf, a junior majoring in
business management and computer
science, has a 3.62 cummulative
gradepoint average on a 4.0 scale.
He was the only Wisconsin college
player named to the 30-member
team.
A 6-foot, eight-inch, 220 pound
center-forward, Womeldorf averaged
11.3 points and 7.2 rebounds per
game as a sophomore, an8 during
the 1983-84 season he averaged 12.3
points and 7.5 rebounds per game.
A native of Mound, Minn.,
Womeldorf has been named co-captain
of the squad by his teammates
for the 1984-85 season.
Womeldorf joins Laurie Hess
(volleyball) and Mike Muckerheide
(wrestling), both of Kenosha, as
Parkside athletes who have earned
Academic Ail-American status for
the 1983-84 school year.
Next year there will be an official
"Parkside Track and Social
Club." If you want to join this club
call Andy Serrano at the Phy-Ed
Building. The aim of the club is to
promote physical fitness through
running and social activities.
Scholarships
Continued from Page 6
Hohensee, Linda Jacob, Susan I.
Leih, Patricia Lenz, Patrick A.
Luchack, Kimberly A. McLeod,
Susan M. Miller, Elaine Pachal,
Steven J. Panizza, Janet Payne,
Steven Pfarr, Gail Pomeroy, Linda
Randelzhofer, Peggy Rasmussen,
Susan Sorenson, Anahid Soukeyasian,
Gregory A. Spencer, Barbara A.
Wallace, Elisa K. Weeks, Denise L.
Wilcox.
From other cities: Jeff Ashton,
Gurnee, 111.; Marguerite McClelland,
Waukegan, 111.; and Erik
Womeldorf, Mound, Minn.
I
with
SAY
LOVE YOU,
MOTHER
FLOWERS
miem SINCE 1908
637-6558
2,19, Sixth Street •.Downtown Racine
Med. Tech Bowl
Students from St. Luke's Hospital
Medical Technology Program
finished second to Marshfield St.
Joseph Hospital in the "Student
Bowl" competition sponsored by
the Wisconsin Assocition for Medical
Technology (WAMT).
St. Luke's team defeated a team
from the University of Wisconsin-
Madison in the semi-finals to advance
to the championship game.
The competition was held at the
state meeeting of the WAMT in
Eau Claire on April 27.
The Student Bowl is a questionand-
answer competition for students
in medical laboratory science
education programs. Twenty teams
from throughout the state entered
the competition. Preliminary
rounds were held April 7.
St. Luke's team members are all
University of Wisconsin-Parkside
seniors who will earn a B.S. degree
in Medical Technology upon completion
of the clinical program at
St. Luke's. Team members are:
Patricia Slater, Genoa City (Captain),
Sue Leih and Tim Helling,
Racine, Jenny Lowrance, Kenosha
and Cadie Lindstrand, Paddock
Lake.
Dona Driscoll fund
Senior Middle distance runner
Dona Driscoll has received an invitation
to join the U.S. National
Track Team, through the International
Sports Exchange, to run in
selected meets in West Germany
this summer.
She is leaving either in June or
the beginning of July. She needs financial
assistance to travel to Europe,
and she is looking for organizations
to help sponsor her, as well as
private donations from businesses
or citizens.
All sponsorship and donations
should be sent to:
UW-Parkside Athletic Department
c/o Dona Driscoll
Box 2000
Kenosha, WI 53241
All donations are tax-deductible.
ORCHARD
COURTS
STUDENT SPECIALS
FROM *120 PER MONTH*
MODERN 4 LO FT" APARTMENTS
• Appliances • Heat & Water
• Carpeting • Electricity
• Drapes • Parking
• Furniture • Laundry facilities
RESERVATIONS FOR FALL TERM
By contacting the manager, you
can actually be sure of meeting
your housing needs in advance
of t he fall semester.
SEPTEMBER 1, 1984 THRU
MAY 31, 1985
RENTAL OFFICE HOURS
Daily 1 pm to 5 pm
Sun. 1 pm to 4 pm
PHONE 553-900_|H
Professionally managed by
THE LANDLORD LTD.
•Based on Double Occupancy
18 Thursday, May 10, 1984 RANGER
Baseball
Men win championship
Spiegelhoff takes an inside pitch. In photo at right, Hoppe (catcher)
goes after the ball.
Monday May 7 was a big day for
the UW-P men's baseball team.
The Rangers beat Lakeland 10-5,
and in doing so became the WICA
Champions. On Saturday, May 12
they will play either UW-Stout or
River Falls for the District 14
Championship.
Joel Meier had the opportunity
to show his stuff by hitting 3 for 5,
two of them triples. Randy Speigelhoff,
batting 2 for 5, had the only
Parkside home run. Also hitting
well were Scott Brooks, Scott Brzenk,
Tom Weipert, and Brian
Hoppe, all hitting 2 for 4.
Sean Patterson was the winning
pitcher. In seven innings he struck
out seven Lakeland batters and had
a 2 earned run average.
On Saturday, May 5, the Rangers
held a slam fest beating Concordia
15-5. Tom Weipert and John Hyatt
both had home runs that day.
Duane McLean was 3 for 4, and
Dave Schwartz 3 for 5. Pitching for
the Rangers was Don Elverman.
>5
The Parkside Union
FINALS
WEEK
DINING ROOM- regular HOURS LSII^III^VJ nvvm. THRU MAY 17
CLOSED MAY 18
OPEN JUNE 18
r TT1
SEMESTER
BREAK
CLOSED
SUMMER
SCHOOL
7:30 a.m. - 6:00 p.m.
COFFEE SHOPPE : REGULAR HOURS REGULAR HOURS CLOSED
UNION SQ. GRILL: CLOSED CLOSED CLOSED
UNION SQ. BAR • REGULAR HOURS CLOSED 11 a.m.-5:30 p.m.
MON. THRU THURS.
11 a.m.-2 p.m.
FRIDAYS
DCP PCMTCD- REGULAR HOURS
KsEIV I Cn. MON. THRU FRI.
11 a.m. - 4 p.m. SAT.
CLOSED SUNDAY
CLOSED 7 p.m. - 10 p.m.
MON. THRU FRI.
CLOSED SAT.
& SU N.
SWEET SHOPPE I CLOSED CLOSED CLOSED
Tennis
closes in
winning
form
The Parkside men's tennis team
returned to winning form with two
match victories last week.
On May 2, Parkside traveled to
Gray's Lake, 111. to play Lake County
College. The matches were played
in 47 deg ree weather, but that
didn't bother UW-P at all. Parkside
took three out of six singles
matches and all three doubles
matches en route to a 6-3 match
victory.
The most interesting match of
the day was the one between Dan
Birch of UW-P and Tim Conners of
Lake County. The final score was 6-
0, 0-6, 6-2 in favor of Birch. Other
singles winners for Parkside were
Mike Roszkowski and Chris Walley.
The Rangers traveled north to
Mequon on May 3 to take on Concordia
College. This match was
played in cold, rainy conditions.
The heaviest rains held off until
after the singles matches, but all
three doubles matches were rained
out. The singles matches were dominated
by Parkside, as only one
man lost his match. All but one
match needed only two games. The
longest match of the day was the
one between Mike Roszkowski of
UW-P and Frank Menon of Concordia.
Roszkowski lost the first game
6-1, b ut came back to win the last
two games 6-3, 6-3.
As a result of these two wins,
Parkside's record stands at 6-7,
only one game below .500. A fter a
1-6 start, the Rangers have won five
of their last six team matches.
RANGER
Host Bi-district tournament
by Patricia Cumbie
Sports Editor
The women's softball team easily
won the District tournament in
Green Bay May 3-5. The games
against Green Bay were won 9-2
and 18-3. The women just out-hit
Green Bay.
The second game went only five
innings because if a team scores
over 10 runs in 5 innings the game
ends. The women had 17 hits for
18. They got one home run, two
triples and two doubles. The triples
were hit by Jackie Rittmer and
Renee Spear. Renee Spear also hit
a double and Ann Althaus hit one.
Janet Koenig was pitching that
game, and she hit one over the
fence for a home run, the first over
the fence home run Coach Linda
Draft has seen in her seven years as
coach.
"Weather-wise it was a great day
to play ball. We hit the ball very
well. It was one of our best days,"
Coach Draft commented.
Before the District tournament,
the team's luck was just good. They
played two double headers, one
against Valparaiso University and
one against Carthage.
They beat Valparaiso 4-0 and 11-
0, which also went only 5 innings
In the 4-0 game Michelle Martino
pitched and only gave up one hit. In
the second game Valpo was out hit
5 to 1. Draft said, "Our bats were
very hot, we just out hit them."
Carthage suffered the same fate
as Valparaiso University being out
hit 12-1 and 15-1. In the second
game the women had 17 hits and
Laurie Hall hit a triple.
The team will be spending this
week preparing for the Bi-District
championship being hosted by
Parkside. The games will be played
the best 2 out of 3. Whoever wins
two will be the winner of the
tournament and advance to nationals.
If Parkside wins the tournament
this will be the fourth year in a row
they have gone to nationals. Competing
with Parkside for this honor
Soccer program changes
by Robb Luehr
- ^ Parkside's soccer program was
dealt a severe blow last month
when coach Hal Henderson announced
that he was leaving Parkside
to take the head soccer coach
and trainer positions at St. Leo College
in St. Leo, Florida.
In his 12 years here, he has developed
the Rangers into one of the
best soccer teams in the Midwest.
They have been in the NAIA area
finals in each of the last five years
and have consistently been in the
top 10 nationally.
Now that Henderson is leaving,
there is a question of what will happen
to the soccer program at Parkside.
To answer that, Ranger spoke
to both Henderson and Athletic Director
Wayne Dannehl, as well as
some of the players themselves.
According to Dannehl, Parkside
has accepted "a lot" of applications
for the position of head trainer.
UW-P is also actively looking for a
coach for soccer. Dannehl also said
that the position will be a part-time
position, at least for the time being.
No mattter what the coaching situation
will be, Dannehl said, "We
expect the soccer program to continue
pretty much the way it has.
We will have the same basic schedule
as before." He also said that
Henderson has established a solid
base from which to work and this
will make transition easier.
"There is no reason why the
Mbcer program can't continue as it
is, depending on whether or not
they get a full-or part-time coach."
Henderson said. "A part-time orach
would not help the program. I
would be disappointed if they went
with a part-time man." Henderson
also stated that some of the new
players he recruited are going to
Florida with him, and a few are
coming to Parkside. There are several
players .whose futures are up in .
the air as of now, according to
Henderson. "I believe that Parksi- *
de will have a relatively strong
team, but the key to the season will
be a new coach."
Henderson would like to see the
university hire another man to do
the same jobs he has done, combination
trainer and coach. His ideal
choice as a successor would be a
former student of his, whom he
didn't name.
A few of the soccer players had
comments about the soccer situation.
Senior Don Theisen said this
could be "a good change, but it is
bad that he is leaving now. He built
us into a respectable team."
Don Matanowski, who has completed
his eligibility and is staying
as a student assistant trainer, said
the program "is being left at a dead
end. It would have been nicer if
Hal had said earlier that he was
leaving. There hasn't been much
recruiting for us."
Sophomore Jeff Fischer wasn't
sure of his status because of the
change. "It doesn't look good right
now; I'm not sure if I'll be back."
Junior Andy Buchanan stated
that the soccer program "has been
set back about five years." Without
Henderson the Rangers "won't be
competitive against Division I
teams as in the past."
Much of the Rangers' schedule
was against Division I schools
(Parkside is the only Division II
school in a collegiate soccer conference
consisting of five teams), and
because of the lack of competitiveness
against these schools, Parkside's
place in the team rankings
could be in jeopardy. In addition,
some of next year's schedule has
been cut. A few away games are
being dropped from the schedule.
The decision to leave is especially
dificult for underclassmen. They
have to choose between starting
over with a new way of doing
things and possibly going somewhere
else with, an established program
. or' leaving school altogether.-
(which no one has yet to achieve in
the league) is Carnegie State.
One of the teams expected to
give Parkside competition is
Winona. So far this season they
have a 21-5 record. They beat Parkside
last year on our home field.
This year we have the home field
advantage again. One of Winona's
strong points is a good hitting ball
club. They also have a better record
this year despite losing a key short
stop and second base player.
"We have more desire to beat
them. Last year we went extra innings.
We have a lot to prepare for,
we have a real challenge on our
hands," Coach Draft said.
The team is ready now. They are
close to their peak. Draft commented,
"I think we're there. The way
the bats are moving we should get
the points." The games will be
played at noon and 2 p.m. at Petrifying
Springs on Friday. "I hope
every one at Parkside will take advantage
of a nice day and come and
cheer us on," Draft said.
NAIA nationals
Ranger photo by Dave McEvoy
Track members qualify
by Patricia Cumbie
Sports Editor
This past weekend at the Chicago
Track Club a few more memberrs
of the men's track team qualified
for the outdoor NAIA nationals in
Kansas City, Kansas.
Fred Knock achieved a new personal
best in the 400 meters (quater
mile). He broke the 50 second
mark, a goal he's been working at
for a while. His newest time is 49.8
seconds. He will be able to be a
real competitor in the upcoming
national competitions.
Ted Miller qualified for the
NAIA national marathon. He broke
his personal best in the 10,000 meters
by 30 seconds. He is pleased
with his performance. He's also
broken personal best times in the
5000 meters. Miller is capable of
running at least a 2 hour 25 minute
marathon. He is expected to place
well at nationals. Coach Lucian
Rosa commented, "Right now Ted
is running very strong, he does well
in practice, and has been breaking
personal records." He will probably
compete against 30-35 runners.
George Kapheim and Marie Hunt
are also going to nationals. Both of
them qualified a few weeks earlier
at Northwestern. Both will run the
10,000 meter run (6.2 miles).
Kapheim will also be running in the
5,000 meter (3.1 mi.). "Both have
been running the second half of the
race very strong. They are mature
and have the experience for national
competition. Kapheim and Hunt
were at the NAIA indoor nationals
earlier this season. As of now they
are ranked 6th and 5th respectively.
At least three of the four race
walkers have qualified for the nationals
also. Qualifiers are Mark
Manning, Andy Kaestner and Rod
Condon. Also expected to qualify is
Mike Rohl.
The men are expected to run
well at nationals. Rosa is hoping for
a top ten position in the NAIA this
seeason. Next season should be
competitive with added maturity,
experience and depth. A tough
team is in the process of building.
ATHLETE OF THE WEEK
Senior Middle Distance Runner
DONA DRISCOLL
of Muskego had an excellent week. The 3-time NAIA All-
American won 3 races and took one second place.
At the Whitewater Invitational on Wed., April 25. Miss Driscoll
won the 800m run in her season's best of 2:21.6 and then
came back 45 minutes later to win the 3000m run in 10:52.3
The following Saturday at the Elmhurst College relays, she
continued her excellent work with another victory in the 800m
with a fine 2:17.7 time, and again came back in the 3000m
with a second place of 10:38.8. She was tied with her team
mate. Sarah Hiett, but Hiett was given the victory.
Over the next few weeks. Dona will be pointing for NAIA Nationals,
where she plans to run the 1500m and 3000m.
NOW OPEN
FOR THE
SUMMER
SEASON.
PARKSIDE UNION
CAMPING
RENTALS
• 2 MAN TENTS
• 4 MAN TENTS
• SLEEPING BAGS
• GROUND PADS
• GAS HEATERS
• GAS LANTERNS
• COOK STOVES
• COOKING KITS
• ICE CHESTS
• WATER JUGS
• CANTEENS
• VITTLE KITS
• CAMP SHOVELS
• BELT AXES
• HUNTING KNIVES
• POCKET KNIVES
• COMPASSES
• FIRST AID KITS
• FLASHLIGHTS
• CAMP STOOLS
• FISHING RODS
• FISHING NETS
• FISH BASKETS
ADVANCE
RESERVATIONS
NECESSARY .
' CALL: 553-2408 m
20 Thursday, May 10,1984 RANGER
STUDENT
LOAN
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Dublin Core
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Title
A name given to the resource
The Parkside Ranger, Volume 12, issue 30, May 10, 1984
Description
An account of the resource
Student newspaper of the University of Wisconsin-Parkside, Kenosha, Wis.
Date
A point or period of time associated with an event in the lifecycle of the resource
1984-05-10
Subject
The topic of the resource
College student newspapers and periodicals
Student publications
University of Wisconsin-Parkside--Newspapers
Format
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Newspaper
Language
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English
Coverage
The spatial or temporal topic of the resource, the spatial applicability of the resource, or the jurisdiction under which the resource is relevant
Kenosha, Wisconsin
Type
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Text
Publisher
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University of Wisconsin-Parkside
Rights
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The Board of Regents of the University Wisconsin System
commuter campus
ranger